Voice testing because I haven't played him IN FOREVER.

[agentm0thman]

Look, mun, I know this is really hard for you, having played a grown version of me for a while, but I'm pretty sure you aren't going to screw me up! I mean, he's still me, right? Essentially?

Okay so look mun, I'm sure I'm not nearly as rusty as you think I am! Look! All my joints work just fine! And my mouth still works too! And my brain still thinks... words... to speak things with? Okay so maybe I suck at that, not you.

See? No problem. Just drop me on in there, mun. You can do this! You...


You don't have the vaguest idea what to do with me now that you've got me, do you.

Great.

Comments

[madethefiresbetter]

[smarmiest of asshole grins over here, pal]

I can tell your filthy mun what to do with you.

[agentm0thman]

[OH YEAH? HOW ABOUT SOME NOPE FOR THAT SHIT EATING GRIN OF YOURS.]

I don't think they listen to alien jerks like you, Zim.

[madethefiresbetter]

[how about some FUCK YOU]

Pity! I have quite a few ideas for you, Dib-stink! Most of them involve explosions.

[agentm0thman]

You wouldn't get away with it, you know.

[Maybe. Dib's not sure how this whole pan-universal thingy works. But he's SURE there's somebody around to get mad about kids exploding! But hey look, aloof Dib is suddenly aloof.]

But that's just as well, I guess. I know what your mun can do with you. It involves industrial barrels full of radioactive waste. The kind that doesn't mutate you.

[madethefiresbetter]

What good is radioactive waste if it doesn't mutate you!?

[agentm0thman]

Hideous melty burns. It dissolves even bone and metal!

[AND EVIL GRIN GOES HERE]

And I just so happen to know where to get some of that stuff! You'll be a puddle of goo before you can even figure out how to explode me!

[madethefiresbetter]

My pak has lasers, y'know. I could explode you right HERE AND NOW if I felt so inclined! Do you think I don't know where to get radioactive waste!?

[agentm0thman]

Yeah, well, your PAK is useless when I have an electromagnetic pulse generator that can short it out!

[Hey what's that Dib has in his jacket pocket? Could it be? IT IS! IT'S... what looks like a pen.]

I dare you to come anywhere near me, space chimp!

[madethefiresbetter]

[Zim sees your "pen" and snorts defiantly]

What're you gonna do with that? Get ink on my shirt!? PATHETIC!

[Okay so maybe calling Dib's bluff wasn't the smartest thing ever but Zim's an asshole so what do you expect. Zim steps forward as if DARING the little mutant to try anything]

[agentm0thman]

[Dib clicks the top of the pen and tosses it towards Zim the moment after the stupid alien walks ahead, and sure enough, it's giving one heck of an electromagnetic pulse out. Nothing deadly, just really, really annoying though. Aaaand he's stepping back from it, himself.]

YEAH! HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT?

[madethefiresbetter]

[FUCK Zim wasn't expecting the thing to ACTUALLY WORK. Zim's PAK brain thingy goes fuzzy for a moment and he stumbles backwards and falls on his little green ass. It takes him a second to recover, but once he DOES, he snarls and glares at his large headed nemesis]

I DON'T LIKE THAT! I DON'T LIKE THAT AT ALL!!

[well at least he was honest.]

[agentm0thman]

HA! good. That's only a taste of what I've got back at home! I've completely surrounded my entire home in a bubble of the stuff! I mean sure, we can't get any reception on the TV anymore and it makes me feel like I'm always being watched, BUT THAT'S A SMALL PRICE TO PAY!

[All of the smug.]

[madethefiresbetter]

I... don't have any reason to go to your house, though. Why would you do that? If I want to destroy you, I can just do it at skool!

[Fat lot of good all that smugness is going to do you against a zim that is too confused to give a fuck!]

[agentm0thman]

[The pen device stops giving off EMP after a certain time, and Dib walks up to collect it and put it back in his jacket.] Which is why I have this to protect me! Just think. Its range is exactly fifteen feet. It's silent, undetectable, and you sit only ten feet away from me. I could just... grab the wrong pen while doing a test!

[Dib WANTS you to start living in fear, Zim. Just like you have done to him time and again. It's your comeuppance or... something.]

[madethefiresbetter]

You think that thing would kill Ms. Bitters? I'm pretty sure half of her organs are artificial. Do you really want to risk destroying one of your fellow human pig-smellies? Is that what you want, Dib!?

[Don't be silly Dib, Zim is too stupid to fear anything.

Except like Foorcourtia]

[agentm0thman]

Actually, I'm pretty sure she's a demon, but that's beside the point.

[madethefiresbetter]

[GASP]

That explains SO MANY THINGS! I think I saw her head turn all the way around once! Human heads aren't supposed to do that, right!?

[well Zim's stuck on the wrong subject now]

[agentm0thman]

[More like THE RIGHT SUBJECT because anything gets put on the back burner for PARANORMAL STUFF!]

No! And she literally levitates. And I've heard stories that she's been teaching at our skool for at least fifty years. And she's always been old! I looked at old yearbooks and every single year, she looks just the same!

Yeah, I'm banking on demon. Or she's a lamia. Those prey on children and are said to be half serpent. She's kinda snakey, I've seen her bifurcated tongue once!

[ex_shadowstep567]

Agent Mothman?

Wasn't mothman a giant monster movie from japan?

[agentm0thman]

You're thinking of Mothra. No, the Mothman is a cryptid which was sighted in West Virginia in the mid-1960s! He was supposedly larger than a human, with glowing red eyes and a gigantic wingspan! The story is, that he was a portent of a really bad disaster that would befall the city in which he was seen. Only a few weeks after they saw him, the only bridge into the city collapsed!

[He really loves that one. It's neat.]

[madethefiresbetter]

[yes good YAMMER AWAY ABOUT NONSENSE, LITTLE DIB]

Yes, humans do have pitifully short life spans, don't they? Hey, what about those...chupathingies. Maybe she's one of those.

[You know Zim's just waiting for Dib to be distracted enough for him to do something evil YOU KNOW IT.

[agentm0thman]

[And Dib is playing RIIIIGHT into it.]

Chupacabras don't exist! They're only mangey dogs. Seriously, if you look back at the evidence provided, as well as the history of the legend, it only dates back to 1992, to a town that had a problem with wild dogs with mange! Honestly, I'm surprised that El Chupacabra is still even a thing people talk about.

[madethefiresbetter]

Don't exist, huh? Then what about the one RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!?

[SUDDENLY ZIM POINTS PAST DIB. QUICK DIB TURN AROUND AND LEAVE YOURSELF VULNERABLE CHECK IT OUT!!]

[agentm0thman]

[OH PLEASE.]

I'm not falling for that again.

[madethefiresbetter]

[Zim's still pointing

and looking around a little nervously

DAMMIT THAT USUALLY WORKS]

Anyway.