(no subject)

Hey, buddy, at lest your mun knows the guy voicing you. My mun has no clue who the guy playing me is- hasn't seen a single thing he's done.

[ So "Yes!" for going in blind. ]

Well, to be fair, she doesn't know that guy either.

All I'm saying is that they could have at least got someone with an accent! Is it really that flarkin' hard??

Voice coaching? They did it for Patty Duke; if they wanted to, this guy could pull it off.

But just imagine- you'll be in Hangover crossovers now.

I gues--

[And there go the eyes narrowing.]

You take that back, Pete, right now!

[ He offers Rocky a nice ol' smirk. ]

What? It could be fun- from what I hear, Vegas is a fun place by human standards.

I swear to flarkin'--

I'm going to shoot you, Pete. Keep talkin' and you'll see what happens!

Okay, okay- calm down. But looking at the state of the net, I'm just saying- be ready.

My mun's already waiting for us to be written in fan-fiction for some show called Parks and Recreation.

[Insert grumble about hating the internet here.]

I have no clue what that is but I don't think I want to know, mate. At all.

[ You and me both, buddy. ]

You don't. Trust me, things are much better in space. With Thanos. And the Phalanx. And all of their kind.

[ He doesn't have much of a kind view of the planet, does he? ]

You know it's bad when we'd rather be spending time with someone like Thanos than dealing with Earth.

[It's okay; Rocket doesn't either.]

At least you weren't born there. Took me more than twenty years to get off the d'ast rock.

I'm still not flarkin' sure how you managed as long as you did on Earth as it is.

I'd take being stuck on Half World any day, mate.

Thick head and being a natural survivor? [ That actually got him into more trouble than out of it. ]

Hey, if it made a guy like you, it can't be half-bad.

I'll definitely give you the thick head bit, mate.

[Natural survivor though? More like insane luck.]

You're flarkin' right it's not half-ba--...were you trying to be witty there?

[ Shh, let him believe he has some talent. ]

Heh. That one actually slipped past me until you said something.

[Oh you have talent, Pete. Just..weird talent. It's what makes you such a quirky individual.]

You're losing your touch, mate.

At least your team gets a movie. The last time my team showed up they killed us off in Marvel Zombies.

...Yeah, that's a bit rough, mate.

Honestly, I'm still waiting for the flarkin' higher ups to pull the 'Just kidding!' card on us.

Hey, at least you guys mess with that crazy guy Thanos right?

Yeah. And let me tell you how much I'm looking forward to that, mate.

Yeah, I'd rather sit at the bar and let someone else handle that one.

A drink is sounding real good right now, mate.

I'll take a crazy ☠☠☠☠ raccoon over broccoli men and Dirk Anger any day.

It's settled then.

We just need to flarkin' find a bar and forget about everything else going on.

[ ...Sounds legit. And kind. He likes you. ]

Wait, wait- So, what's the general consensus there? Glass half-full or glass half-empty?

Sounds like a good plan.

The Avengers are just going to take care of it anyways, so what's the point of getting our ☠☠☠☠ kicked just to make them look better?

[Aw, you're going to make him blush.]

.....My mun's telling me to say half-full, 'cause she thinks it's going to be okay.

But I'm not so flarkin' sure.

I knew you were smart, mate. As much as I hate to let those ☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠ have the glory, I'm not too flarkin' keen on anymore fighting at the moment.

Not when I can get some drinks instead.

[ Oh, good thing Pete can't see that under the fur, Rocky. He'd tease so hard. ]

Half-full's a good way to go. I mean, hey- gotta be some good out there if we ended up on the same team.

[Don't give him another reason to shoot you in the leg, Pete.]

Exactly! And we keep ending up together along with the others so clearly we're doing something right.