Looking for a Blaine to play at dagaz

[somepartsbroken]

Look miss puppeteer, I know you think your doing good by your friend.

However, I am not about to switch my sexual orientation to fill the void in Kurt's heart. Nor will you force me. We both know you will not watch Glee, despite the rising interest, you wont watch Hannibal, you surely will not watch Glee.

What we need is a large box, some duct tape and a cattle prod. Stay with me on this. I have a point.

We will simply have to look through the multiverse for another version of Mr. Anderson to sweep our baby bird off his feet. With a new clone or version of Blaine, Kurt will be sad no more and we can return to our wacky adventures with everyone.

So, box, duct-tape and cattle prod. We find Blaine Anderson, trap him in the box, tape it closed and prod him if he tries to escape. Then deliver the box to Kurt!

Sound good? Yes? no?... what. Shut up. It's brilliant!

Comments

[rumchocolatesouffle]

You are one crazy crazy man. But I love you for it.

[somepartsbroken]

Well us Malkavians are not known for our sanity my dear friend. Though the feeling is mutual.

[rumchocolatesouffle]

It's so nice that you care so much about me.

[somepartsbroken]

Is that not what friends are for?

I am a terrible lover, but a fantastic friend so I like to think. So I will use my desire to keep our friendship strong to find you a lover.

[rumchocolatesouffle]

Well,you aren't exactly my type. We get along well as friends but we would be horrible together. Although I do think you need to consider one of your other friends a little more closely...

It sounds really strange to think of finding 'another' Blaine, but I suppose that's how it works around here isn't it?

CW; link is song that some may find triggery.

[somepartsbroken]

We have talked about this, my days courting are done. I have much more fun enjoying watching other people happy in the throes of young love. That is not to say I have ever watched anyone in any other type of throes... but I digress.

Yes, yes in deed.

[rumchocolatesouffle]

Right, right. I might have to start calling you an ostrich.

You have the most unique song choices.

[somepartsbroken]

....I do not get what you mean.

I know, is it not wonderful?

[rumchocolatesouffle]

You are putting your head in the sand and not seeing things around you, just like an ostrich does.

It is. I wouldn't have listened to a lot of things if it weren't for you.

[somepartsbroken]

My head is not in the sand, if it be anywhere it is the clouds.

Nor I you, I am always glad to give you more too.

[rumchocolatesouffle]

This is the one area I'll only argue with you for a while since I know you get real touchy about it.

[somepartsbroken]

Yes, but isn't that half the fun?

[rumchocolatesouffle]

It would be far more fun for me to actually argue till you see the error of your ways.

[somepartsbroken]

You find someone who catches my eye, then we'll see.

[rumchocolatesouffle]

That's kind of sad that you don't see her then.

[somepartsbroken]

You've lost me.

[rumchocolatesouffle]

Oh my god you can be dense sometimes. A woman likes you and I think you two would be great together but you're being a stubborn ass.

[somepartsbroken]

If you are talking about who I think then I have reasons, I would rather be friends with Devi then push the bounds to more. I am a terrible lover as I said.

[rumchocolatesouffle]

That's a real shame.

[somepartsbroken]

Jane and Devi are off the list Kurt, Devi is my greatest of female friends, and Jane simply pissed me off.

Anyone else I will consider.

[rumchocolatesouffle]

My dad always said the best person to marry was your best friend.

[somepartsbroken]

I bought my bride for 200 dollars and my father's best horse.

[rumchocolatesouffle]

[Sigh]

You know it was more than that. But if you want to look past something that could be really great, that's your choice.

[somepartsbroken]

Not at first, you missed my point or I didn't give enough context. Katherine and I were not love at first sight, hell she hated me for the first two months we knew one another. Which is to say love happens in strange ways Kurt.

If I do find love again I want it to be on my own terms.

[sortofnosferatu]

[There are times in every Scourge's unlife when all he can do is thank God this guy doesn't live in my city.]

Excuse me, but...don't you have Dominate? Obfuscate? Means of making the process a bit more...subtle?

This is going to end up on the evening news, I'm certain of it.

[somepartsbroken]

I do indeed have Obfuscate, I lack dominate however. I could easily handle this by such manners, but at the end of the day, where is the fun in that? I ask you, why waste time burning blood when one can simply deploy wit and skill and trap a sturdy young gentlemen to woo my baby bird.

[sortofnosferatu]

[The corner of his eye is now twitching.]

Kidnapping people and shipping them to their friends with a concussion is your idea of "wit and skill"?

...how many frenzies does your Prince have in a given week because of you? On average? [His question is as dry and deadpan as only a Nosferatu can manage. Meanwhile he's hoping said unfortunate Prince is not a Gangrel, or he probably currently looks like someone threw a zoo into a blender.]

[somepartsbroken]

Mayhaps it is a bit barbaric, but is it not a better choice then enslave the mind or give unneeded blood bonds? And I never said he would be harmed while in the box. Simply if he tries to escape.

There is no prince, we have been whisked away to a magical temple in another realm to be married off to a prince which is not like the princes of our world. Though I am told this is a ruse that there is more at play.

And before you ask, the prince in the town I lived had no issues with me. At home I had taken a self subjected vow of silence the past two decades. He was pleased to have a silent Malkavian in his court.

[sortofnosferatu]

I am not suggesting enslavement. I am suggesting that you take a page from the Toreadors' book and go talk to the man like a person. A bit of a nudge here and there would help make your argument more persuasive.

Also, human brains are extremely delicate, and many a misguided Kindred has permanently damaged them with a clop on the head. Will your friend be happy if his new love has violent seizures and can't remember anything from one minute to the next? Let's not even talk about the trauma of being kidnapped and shipped somewhere with someone ready to whap you again if you try to escape.

[His eyebrows rise at the description.] This "multiverse" thing proves more insane all the time. You must enjoy it greatly.

[He looks dubious about silent Malkavians being the best sort.] Your point of view and that of your Clan should not be silenced. But I really think you should treat your gift to your friend better.

mun gave into watching hannibal. do not resist it.

[sempiternally]

Use a stun gun instead of a cattle prod. They're legal for citizens to have in my state and probably in a lot of states. Only thing is you gotta pass the requirement list. But they're really not that hard to own if you don't have any checks against you.

Stun guns keep people paralyzed longer. It's better than the cattle prod by far. And if you don't believe me than go watch a youtube video- or whatever of them in action.

I know of you, your friends with a friend~!

[somepartsbroken]

Oh but you see the cattle prod would scare them more so that I would not actually have to bring harm too them. I do not wish to injury the boy by any means. He must be fit to court my baby bird once he arrives. Boyfriends do not come prepackaged so I must make sure he is not damaged in shipping.

However, I will look into that if only for the laugh of seeing people shocked.

i don't know if to be excited or creeped out (:

[sempiternally]

Not everyone freaks out at the sight of a cattle prod. You're gonna have to use that thing to hurt someone when the object of fear isn't working out.

But from what you're saying, it doesn't seem like it'll take much effort to get this guy into that box. The object of fear does work on him and I doubt you'd have to use that prod to shock him. You probably wouldn't even have to hit him once.

I'm a friend of Ramens~ (I stalk Paul's threads)

[somepartsbroken]

I do wonder if I could just scare him into the box without use of any weapon. Fangs are quite the motivator after all.

You have a fair point.

Oh!! So you were witness to that lovely night in the cave then.

[sempiternally]

Fangs huh. Are they real?

[cordelisse]

[Zoey can't help but laugh]

You're a sweetheart, Dorian.

[somepartsbroken]

[ Sound sounds proud when he responds.]

Someone has to cheer the boy up, and I feel I am equipped to get the job done. It might make up for all of my mistakes.