Guess who's turning 30 todaaay?

[inordertobelieve]

 Miss Mundane, 

Thank you for your nice wishes and the time you spent on me today. All the jokes about 'middle aged' were not called for though.
No, I'm not being sensitive, this is just a matter of basic consideration. In life, you will always need to be able to differentiate which kind of relation allows which kind of informality. 

I'm fine without any further celebration, don't trouble yourself. It's a day as any other in the end.

-Teru Mikami

Comments

[endlessdark]

[It's the little things that catch Sayu so woefully unprepared. Light had never reached middle-age. In some respects, maybe it's better that way - her brother had never seemed particularly happy about anything and despite teasing him about getting married and settling down, she can't really imagine him starting a family. Settling down. Living a menial life.

She bites her lower lip. The unexpected pang this causes her is... unbelievably silly of her. All she wanted to do was wish this man a happy birthday, and she can't even do that like a normal human being. What's wrong with her? IIrritation bleeds into grief, leading to a complicated brew of emotions, but she puts on her best smile to hide behind.]

An ordinary day, but happy birthday all the same.

[inordertobelieve]

Thank you.

[ It takes him a moment to recognize her. The last and only time he saw her, she had been 14 years old at the Manor. Yagami Sayu. God's younger sister. He gives her a polite nod and even something like a smile. It pains him a bit to see her, but at the same time he's glad. After losing God yet again, coming in contact with his relative was like a blessing. ]

In the end it's only a formality, a change of a number.

[ He knows, in this realm at least, that he should never have reached this number. But it doesn't really matter, he told himself. ]

[endlessdark]

You make it sound so boring.

[You make it sound like something oniichan would say, she thinks privately. The attitude shouldn't make her angry as it isn't any of her business, but would it really hurt this man to let other people fuss over him just one day out of the year? She's projecting, of course. She's really furious with herself because she, and her parents, had simply gone along with Light's minimalistic approach to birthday celebrating and now he won't ever have one again.]

Why don't you let people spoil you just this once?

[inordertobelieve]

[ The simple questions sparks very far-away memories. Long-buried and forgotten, birthday cakes and candles. It had never been 'spoiling'. For spoiling there wasn't any money. They weren't poor, but not wealthy either and there were only so many new glasses a single parent could afford in a year without going back on something else. He never minded. Even then, making a fuss on an otherwise normal day irritated him. Maybe back then more than today. He'd been unstable, even if he'd never have admitted it to himself, and the routine break would have been too much to take. He just wanted this last bit he could cling to.
And nowadays more than ever, he couldn't be bothered to care. There was no logical reason to. Getting older was a natural process and celebrating a birthday was mostly a 'congratulations you've made it this far'. Even if Mikami more than anybody needed this, more than anybody had struggled to get to this point without breaking, he still considered it nothing more than his duty as a human being. There was nothing worthy of cheering about it. ]

Usually there is nobody to do the act of spoiling. [ He pays attention to make it sound neutral and non-worry-inducing, but it's still a bit distant. ] So there is no way I could be used to it. By now, I've set my own routine.

[endlessdark]

[She falls silent immediately, guiltily shifting her eyes away from Mikami's face. His comment gets her to stop thinking from within her own perspective. No one there to do the spoiling? She hadn't meant to be so callous, and naive about this man's situation, and she feels even worse for bringing up the subject in the first place. How could she have been so narrow minded?]

I- I'm sorry, I shouldn't have pried. That was very rude of me. [She bows deeply, clearly apologetic.] I didn't mean to offend...

...Ah, would you excuse me for a moment?

[inordertobelieve]

[ Mikami shakes his head. ]

I'm not offended. I don't feel bad about this matter and there is no way you could have known. Don't trouble yourself.

[ It's what he means. Even if he might actually still have hurt in a corner of his heart somewhere, Mikami has efficiently convinced himself to leave every bit of past behind him. ]

And of course. [ He has no idea what she would do but he'd not stop her. ]

[endlessdark]

[And yet, in Sayu's mind, it is her fault. If she hadn't been agonizing over her brother, perhaps she would have picked up on cues that she otherwise missed. The reassurances don't do much to change that. She does smile, however, before turning to leave.

It occurs to her that maybe this is still being selfish on her part. Maybe what she ought to be doing is respecting the man's wishes to have an unrecognized birthday, but at the end of the day, it's just a cupcake. She couldn't even do that much for her brother.

And because it's dear mun, she returns with a cupcake fairly quickly. She hands it to Teru with a smile.]

For an ordinary day.

[inordertobelieve]

[ For a moment Mikami just looks really lost. His social competence was perfect in all business areas, he was always smooth and calm... But if there was a thing he was not used to then it was friendliness like this. It's gotten better after the Manor, but he keeps on being startled nevertheless.

This is God's sister, a good girl, too. And even if he can't properly appreciate the gesture, he can appreciate the thought. After the shock second, Mikami even manages a notable smile. It feels bittersweet, in many ways. ]

You needn't have done anything like this, but thank you very much.

[endlessdark]

[She needn't have, true, but this is an action that simply felt right. Moreover, she wouldn't have been able to forgive herself if she didn't. Sayu is tired of looking back on her life and feeling regret. She wants, more than anything else, to be able to look forward. She and Mikami have that much in common.]

It was no trouble, but you're very welcome.