Regarding competition between different series incarnations of a certain consulting detective...

[womanwhobeatyou]

Come now, dear, you know it would be incredibly amusing to set all of these variations on Mr. Holmes against each other. See them try to prove which one of them was the most clever, the quickest in their deductions. And yes, I do mean all of them, including that young American man with the pineapple and the limping doctor. Though perhaps not the talking cucumber.

No, I don't suppose you have the wherewithal to make it happen, but I would certainly enjoy watching. And perhaps the good Doctors Watson would take a bet on which one of them murders each other with a violin bow first.

Comments

[formersurgeon]

...pineapple?

[womanwhobeatyou]

Yes. I believe there is an American man whose talents are quite like those of Mr. Holmes, but rather prefers masquerading as a false police psychic with his deductive abilities. And there is always a pineapple somewhere in the vicinity of their adventures.

I expect that's no less absurd than the version of yourself that is a talking tomato, Miss Watson.

[solvescases]

[interested hum and smirk]

Boredom?

[Is that what incited this plan?]

[formersurgeon]

As I understand it, my mun has young children and is quite familiar with the vegetable adaptation. I think she'd prefer this pineapple person too.

[thetruthismine]

The ones in waistcoats, too?

[womanwhobeatyou]

[Smirks back.]

Curiosity. The ones I've had the pleasure of meeting have been quite...impressive.

[Is she trying to suggest they might be better than you, Sherlock? Maybe.]

[solvescases]

[He hits a sour note on plucking his violin with a frown. Now that was diabolical.]

Impressive? How do you mean? [NOT JEALOUS]

[womanwhobeatyou]

No doubt. I have it on somewhat dubious authority from the dear Miss Mundane that Mr. Shawn Spencer is entertaining, as is his friend Mr. Guster. No doubt you and the latter would have quite the afternoon commiserating.

[i_favour_you]

You know, you only have seven days left.

Then we'll have another face with your name. And a whole new realm of innuendo to put to you.

[womanwhobeatyou]

How clever is the mind behind the waistcoat?

[womanwhobeatyou]

[SO SMUG.]

Make a deduction, Mr. Holmes.

[thetruthismine]

Obviously not very, if it's behind the waistcoat instead of above it.

[/is something of a troll]

[womanwhobeatyou]

Oh but we both know you'll still see me when you're desperate and pining inside your own head, Sherlock.

[i_favour_you]

No. No, I imagine I'll see both of you in various horizontal positions.

[womanwhobeatyou]

Indeed. And without imagination either, it would seem.

[Come on now, Patrick Jane, trolling Sherlock Holmes in all his forms is what she does]

[thetruthismine]

[This is true. It's why he likes her.]

I'm sure I can imagine plenty of things.

[womanwhobeatyou]

Rather hard to see anything blindfolded, even in your imagination.

[solvescases]

[Now a sharp look. Confound you, woman.]

[i_favour_you]

Oh, adding layers to the fantasy now. Just how I prefer it. I imagine I'd also be bound.

You wouldn't be so cruel as to block up my ears, would you?

[womanwhobeatyou]

What is it the Americans enjoy saying? That talk is very very cheap.

[womanwhobeatyou]

[This look.]

Can't? Or won't?

[thetruthismine]

Challenge me, then. Tell me to imagine something.

[solvescases]

Hmph.

I take it you are supposedly the impartial judge in these fantasy fights between universes?

[Ha.]

[womanwhobeatyou]

You'd enjoy that far too much. I'd have you in a cage.

[womanwhobeatyou]

If you have to be instructed on what to imagine, that's hardly imagination now, is it?