dean said yes au

[premeditated]

So we're back here again. For all that you've done with me, all that you've tried to break me of, it was always meant to be. It's in your nature to want to believe it.

It's the only way to do what is right, what has always meant to be.

Comments

[apalerider]

[ El, give or take a few time gaps, you and Mot have been together since you both existed. If anyone was going to understand you and what you wanted, it'd damn well better be him.

Now, whether or not Mot wants to actually give you what you want can be another matter entirely sometimes. But he knows you, and you know him. Of course it tastes like vinegar on the edge of his tongue to actually say it, but you're his best friend. More than that, you're his counterpart, Creation to his Destruction. Obviously, it follows that he feels rather obligated to represent you where you can't represent yourself, in a way you can't present yourself. You might think yourself to be someone that can put your foot down when you need to, but when it comes to your bratty boys, you really can't, and you won't.

Mot disapproves of it. He think you should have stuck around a little bit longer and maybe explained the concept of free will before you handed out the final exam, because clearly you tossed the angels into the deep end of the pool before you taught them how to swim. Most of them have sank. You should have left a damn note on the table before you ran away from Heaven, at least with little hints about what the challenge was, because all the angels are frothing at the damned mouth about it.

Mot's got plenty of things that he doesn't like about how you went about all this, but... he's supported them all anyway. That's just the kind of team player he is.

Which is why he's kind of miffed Michael recently implied he's tried to insert himself into the angel family, like it's some sort of Kool Kids Club with membership jacket. Not to be creepy or anything, bro, but he had you first. Fucking dibs. ]

Ugh, I feel like you should be given an award for putting up with all my typos.

[godsprophet]

[He was never denying that Mot didn't understand him. They might as well be able to read each other's minds for how well the two of them can understand each other sometimes. But after living as prophet, and seeing Michael and Lucifer and Raphael and Gabriel struggle with the concept of free will so hard and still not getting it when the answer is staring them in the face? Being around Mot, who understands, is like a breath of fresh air.

Which, come to think about it, is very strange terminology to use around Death, but there you have it.

But there in lies the beauty of meta, is that they don't have to actually say any of it. Because Mot truly is his oldest, longest and dearest friend. He does care about what Mot thinks, and Mot's opinions are just as important as his own. And if Mot where to ever, for any reason, abandon Earth for another solar system, it is very likely that El, sooner or later, would end up following after him like a lost puppy. Because living on Earth, as a human, alone, can be very lonely. Mot is his one constant in the universe, as different as they may be. If Mot left, the loneliness would become truly unbearing.

And he is well aware of what Mot, and everyone else, thinks about how he raised his kids. And sure, maybe he raised them wrong. Maybe he made them too flawed to begin with. Maybe he should have scrapped them and started over. But he'd thought they could change, that they could learn. And he still does. The magic words are free and will and he still believes in them.

But, he hadn't wanted them to get free will because he ordered them too. After all, what was the point of free will if you had no choice? No, he wanted them to have free will because they wanted it. And anything he could have said at that point would have been taken as an order. Everything else had.]