dear_mun | reserved at exitvoid.

They don't really listen to us.

[ This is Jesse. This is Jesse's head in his hands. ]

Yeah. Yeaaaaaah. [ The words come out smushed. ] Tell me something I don't already know.

I wish I could tell you that place you're going to isn't that bad.

It kind of is. [ She sounds pretty resigned about it. ]

Don't tell me you're already on the psycho axe murderer Love Boat. [ Jesse groans. ] You're s'posed to make me feel better, man. Not tell me I'm gonna die.

[ A beat, then miserably: ] Am I gonna die?

I can't really say. It really depends on how unlucky you get.

[ She makes a face. ] That's still not very reassuring. I guess the reassuring part is you're not alone. There's plenty of friends and allies going through it, too. We all tend to band together well.

[ Jesse scrunches up his face. ] Yeah, well—

I'm not really rolling in the useful skills department, y'know what I'm saying? [ Except for maybe cooking meth. Which doesn't really seem to be the sort of thing to do on a horror boat. ]

Edited 2013-03-13 22:30 (UTC)

[ Maybe for escapism? Just kidding that seems like a bad idea... ]

There are people willing to train others? [ She shrugs. ] Or you could just focus on surviving by avoiding bad things for as long as possible.

Training. [ Which immediately makes Jesse think about discipline. Which, for the record, he really doesn't have a lot of. ] Awesome. [ Which is to say: ]

I am totally boned.

Well, at least you're optimistic.

[ natasha. ]

Edited 2013-03-14 00:36 (UTC)

You don't have to deal with her all the time, alright? It gets kinda old after a while.

[ drier than sheets fresh from the laundry: ]

I can't possibly imagine.

What's the worst you've got to deal with, anyway? What, like a little blue goop in your hair's gonna throw off your feng shui or whatever?

[ Jesse...that word doesn't actually mean what you think it means, honey. ]

No, but another epidemic might.

[ not to mention losing an eye or being crushed by gravity. though, granted, neither of those things have actually happened to her. ~~yet, but she just got back in.~~ ]

I'm not trying to make this a competition, just pointing out that you're hardly the first to be dissatisfied with what your typists decide to do with you.

[ Pardon Jesse while he gets hung up on the word 'epidemic'. (Somebody watches a little too much late-night Discovery Channel. ]

What, like — ebola?

Dude.

More like yellow fever, except blue.

[ still want to tease her about that goop? ]

[ Jesse thinks about this for a moment but — nope, hasn't seen a program on yellow fever. ]

Do your guts end up sliding out your ass with that one too?

No, but your vomit eventually turns black due to intestinal bleeding.

[ also, you turn blue. ]

[ It's a good thing Natasha leaves out the turning blue part. Jesse would otherwise have difficulty taking this particular epidemic seriously. ]

That is some seriously fucked up goo.

[ she wouldn't exactly be able to fault him for that; it'd sound ridiculous to her if she hadn't lived through it. ]

Yeah. [ she shrugs. ] But things have been worse.

Worse? How the fuck—

[ Natasha, now you're just showing off. ]

Define 'worse'.

Didn't I say this wasn't a competition?

Hey, you started it. [ Actually...no she didn't. ] I'm just letting the conversation take its natural course.

No, you asked questions and I answered them.

[ and 'defining worse' is not something she's about to do. she could come up with a convincing lie, but that would likely just bring up more questions and it's not worth the effort. ]

...Really? Just like that?

Dude, G. [ Finally, a friendly face. ] Help a brother out, yo.

How, exactly? You want to try convincing this one to drag me down with you?

[ ~~shh, gretel, you'll ruin the surprise!~~ ]

Edited 2013-03-14 00:51 (UTC)

Yes!

[ Is it bad that he's completely stoked by the prospect? ]

Totally, yes.

[ ugh. ] You're a true friend. [ probably, but she was kind of expecting him to be. ]

I'm pretty sure she's still intent on not taking me anywhere. [ but she's less convinced of that than she sounds. ]

Real friends stick their necks out for one another. Sometimes that means ending up on a Texas Chainsaw Massacre pleasure cruise, like battle zombie demons for the last can of spam. Y'know — take one for the team.

I mean, it's not like you can't totally handle yourself. [ Unlike some people here. ] I don't get why she'd want to keep you cooped up, anyway. You'd totally kick ass wherever.

First of all, you lost me on about half those references, and second, I don't recall ever signing up for this team.

[ he has a point there, and her mouth tightens before she pushes a sigh through her lips. ]

She's been going back and forth on whether or not to send me somewhere for a while. I think she's worried about how I'll fare without my brother.

[ because the two of them are ridiculously codependent. ]

Ah. Yeah. Totally.

[ For all of Jesse's earlier enthusiasm, he gets why trying to push this particular point would qualify as straight up douche territory. ]

I mean, it's not like you're not totally convincing either. Bet you could snag one like that.

Yeah.

[ she's quiet for a long while, then shrugs. ]

I don't know. It's possible. I have, technically, but I can't exactly make him follow me wherever I end up.

[ A slight smile. Lightly: ]

Do you always give up that easily?

[ Jesse frantically holds up three of his fingers and waves them around in the air between the both of them. ]

Three times, okay? I've asked her three times to cut me some slack, but no. I got nada. And I wasn't even a total dick the first time.

Well, they do say third time's the charm. Obviously, it didn't quite work out this time. [ She tips her head to one side, as if soliciting his opinion on this. ]

[ Jesse's expression reads pretty easily and what it says is: it never works out. In fact, as if that isn't obvious enough, he gives a rueful sort of snort, rubbing his shaved head with a hand. ]

Yeah, well no surprise here: my luck's not actually the greatest.

[ Truth is, Emily doesn't believe in luck much herself. You make your own luck, she might say, except that she doesn't believe that much either. So then this: you make the things you want happen or you don't. Luck has no part in it.

Not a flicker of that shows on her face, though. ]

Maybe a change of scenery is just what you need, then.

[ Seriously.

Seriously? ]

When folks say shit like that, they usually don't mean a horror boat, lady. No offense or nothing, but you must be new around here.

[ She shrugs. It's the kind of shrug that accepts the truth of what he's saying while not seeming particularly bothered by it. ]

New-ish. But new or not, I'm not usually the naive, overly-trusting type. I've got a pretty good sixth sense for bad situations.

[ To his credit, Jesse's got a pretty good sense for bad situations too. He's just not particularly good at avoiding them, when everything's said and done. ]

The whole set-up's bad news. You, me, us, here. [ By here, he means the spiritual green room to the next jamjar. ] It's not really a bullet you can dodge anymore, man. She's got you, dead cold.

You just make it sound so dire. [ Emily crosses her arms over her stomach in a gesture that's half-hug and half-determination, an uneasy mix comforting and stubbornness. ] There aren't that many obstacles in life that are really impossible to overcome.

[ There's something about what she says that twinges Jesse in a weird way. ]

Yeah, and the next thing I know, you're gonna start telling me to apply myself. [ Which, for the record, is a way more complicated ping than how Jesse makes it sound. ]

[ Emily blinks, apparently surprised, and then her surprise gives way to smiling confusion. Meanwhile, this reaction -- an interesting and potentially pertinent piece of information -- is filed away for later consideration. ]

Don't get me wrong. I think there's a lot to be said for applying yourself generally. [ She holds up both her hands. ] But I make a point of not going around sticking my nose into other people's business.

[ Jesse spreads his hands wide, like a shit-eating expression of enjoy without the usual satisfaction that comes with it. ]

Too late, lady. You're already here.

I didn't say I was very good at it, [ Emily says with another shrug and a smile that says she know she's been caught out. ] Can I at least get an A for effort?

I take my eyes off you for one second...

[ Both hands in the air like an innocent man. Cause that's totally what Jesse is in this scenario.

Yup. ]

Wasn't me, V. For once. I swear to fucking god.

reserved at exitvoid.

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brb doubletap, part one

an embarrassment of riches c':

showering upon you c:

you spoil me :'3

because ilu

don't make me go all kawaii on your ass carlee

if you're gonna you'd better BRING IT

i have a collection of emojis ok

i'll counteract with gifs or some shit

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED

WELCOME TO THUNDERDOME

WOW NOW I'VE GOT A TINA TURNER SONG STUCK IN MY HEAD THANKS A LOT

YOU'RE WELCOME

slow motion nooooo

evil laughter

and two!

gurrrrrl <3__<3

hay babby *-:

we need to seriously just set up a proper verse for these two losers

yesyesyes pls!!!

because gretel obvs doesn't have enough boneheads to keep in line

between him and ben she should get a friggin' medal

all the awards

she'd put them on a mantle IF SHE HAD ONE

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