from a canon AU where George Washington was king instead of president

[historicalinaccuracy]

[Here stands George Washington himself, gripping a mysterious shining orb on a staff. But he may not be as your history texts remember...]

Pledge your loyalty to my cause for freedom under my absolute rule, Mun. Leave this power in my hand, so I may stamp out those who oppose the force of liberty and hold my rightful sovereignty. Then we will see if I abide by your control over where I may preside.

Comments

[chokingchildren]

"Absolute rule"? "Rightful sovereignty"? Those hardly sound like the words of a man fighting for freedom and liberty.

[ and oh how he would like to give a giant fuck you to everyone who thought this guy was a better choice for commander in chief than him. ]

[historicalinaccuracy]

Hehehh. I am not surprised that you envy me. I never could depend on your loyalty, Lee. How difficult is it to summon those traitorous words when this symbol of my power shines before you?

[chokingchildren]

I am loyal to those who deserve my loyalty. This "symbol of power" of yours is all the proof needed to say that you are not deserving of it. You depend on that far too much and without it you are still the incompetent fool I always knew you were. My loyalty is better left with men who do not rely on the supernatural to accomplish anything.

[historicalinaccuracy]

It is my tool for rightful conquest. It has shown me the true path to liberty, one that only I may achieve. No one fights wars without weapons.

Perhaps you need encouragement to see the err of your folly tongue. What will it be, Lee? Will you gaze upon its light, or would you prefer to die? I can grant either. I am in a generous mood.

[chokingchildren]

No one believes that a man who speaks of absolute rule has any interest in liberty, either. [ Washington is starting to sound like a Templar, in all honesty. it's kind of funny. it still doesn't make Charles like him, though. ]

How fortunate for me to find you in such a generous mood. I am afraid I will have to decline both offers. I will neither die by your hand nor will I gaze upon the light of that thing. Perhaps, when you have acquired the strength to do anything on your own, I might take you seriously.

[packalpha]

Washington, you must stop this! Do not spread your madness here as well.

[Hey King W, guess who's still alive after... How many times did you shoot and stab him?]

[historicalinaccuracy]

...Remarkable. I thought for sure I had put you out of your miserable existence.

[packalpha]

No. I am more alive than I have ever been. And I will continue to pursue you until you listen to me -- to reason.

[historicalinaccuracy]

An amusing fantasy of yours. The only ones who need listen to reason are the ones who oppose my reign.

Perhaps this time I will separate your head from your shoulders. I doubt you will be pursuing me any further in that condition.

[packalpha]

You speak of reason, and yet your words are a hypocrite's. How can you fail to realise you have become what you sought to oppose?!

[historicalinaccuracy]

The path to liberty has never been clearer before me. A fist of iron is the only way. But why waste my time trying to convince you? You will soon be dead, I will make sure of that this time.

[packalpha]

...And so the colonies pass from one King George to another, and nothing changes, save that the violence continues worse than ever. You are mad with power, you and your backers.

[He spits at Washington's feet.]

Here is my tribute to your reign and your false liberty. You have taken enough from me -- you will take no more.

[idkworldruler]

Autocratic Washington? I can dig...kind of.

[oneitalyunderme]

Interesting tactic. You offer both freedom and tyranny at the same time. I doubt anybody will fall for it, but you certainly deserve credit for trying.

[hoorayformcnuggets]

Wow. How stupid do you think we are, man?

[unfetter]

Absolute? Non, monsieur. These are not the ideals that will forge a nation where any may live in peace.

[red_fox]

[ Have a very heartbroken looking Thomas Jefferson, staring wordlessly in response. ]