Yes but hearing that story again would be unBEARable I hear.

[chompedcleanoff]

Awwwwwww that's mah favorite part an' ye just go an' put it there. Now how am I s'posed ta tell the story of th' demon bear.

Well get on wi' it then. What do ye want?

Comments

[myownhand]

Dad!

[ARE YOU READY FOR THE HUG TRAIN FERGUS!? WE MAKE NO STOPS]

[gotawarrent]

I'M NOT A BEAR, OKAY?

I'm a bunny! A bunny!

[gunslingerguy]

....demon bear?

Fergus is awesome, and you're awesome for bringing him out

[wallcrawler]

Call me crazy, but I'm pretty sure there's a lot of people around here unfamiliar with that particular story. And demon bears in general.

[Do bears come in demon flavor? Does that mean there's angel bears?]

[dunbrochqueen]

-oh really? you're going to take this attitude towards your wife?-

[chompedcleanoff]

Merida! There you are lass.

[Of course he is.]

[chompedcleanoff]

Aye, that's easy enough ta see.

[Give it a moment that you're a giant talking bunny.]

Och, th' biggest bunny i've ever seen. Did it jist gab?

[chompedcleanoff]

Aye. Mor'Du. Biggest bear you've ever seen. Fifteen feet tall, wit' razor claws.

[gunslingerguy]

I'll have to take your word for it. We don't have bears where I'm from.

Thank you.

[chompedcleanoff]

It starts when Merida was jist a wee lass, an we were celebratin' her birthday. From nowhere, the biggest bear you've ever seen! It stood fifteen feet tall with razor claws and sharp teeth. Its hide littered with the weapons of fallen warriors. Its face scarred with one dead eye.

[Of course he motions to emphasize this.]

I drew my sword, ready to fell the beast, when with one swipe my sword shattered.

[chompedcleanoff]

-He wasn't talkin about you. It was Mor'Du! Still have a hearty laugh and a hug.-

Elinor!

[chompedcleanoff]

Don't hae bears? Count yer stars then, savage monsters they can be.

[gunslingerguy]

I've only seen pictures of them. I'm too far south to ever get a chance to see the real thing. But we have a lot of snakes, and alligators, so I figure it balances out.

...I take it the bear did some damage to you. [It's obvious, but it's an awkward topic. With all the craziness of magic in his life, Jaeris has never considered animals and the threat they could represent.]

[dunbrochqueen]

Fergus!

-it's definitely fond and she hugs him back-

[chompedcleanoff]

How hae ya been luv? I'd heard awful things 'bout this place.

[chompedcleanoff]

Aye, took my leg clean off with a single chomp of his jaw. [See the knobby peg of a leg he gestures to.]

[dunbrochqueen]

Awful things? What awful things?

[chompedcleanoff]

Talkin animals, an' all kin' ay magic an' pish. Even tales ay folk taken awa' tae strange lands. I'd thought the worse.

[dunbrochqueen]

Aye? Don't tell me that scares you.

-she chuckles and pinches his side to tease him-

[gunslingerguy]

How did you make it out alive?

[chompedcleanoff]

Ay course nae! At least nae th' talkin' animals or magic. I was jus' thinkin' about ye an' Merida an' the boys.

-After all he was the fearless bear king-

[chompedcleanoff]

Mah sword hud shattered, so all 'at was left was mah bare hands. Ah beat th' bear back 'til it wen' runnin' back ta the woods.

[dunbrochqueen]

Merida isn't. She's a strong enough lass to look after herself and I'm no helpless maiden either.

-but the boys, she gasps-

Have you seen the boys?

[gunslingerguy]

But how did you not bleed to death? That kind of wound shouldn't be survivable.

[chompedcleanoff]

A piece ay metal, red hot, was taken tae it tae close th' wound. Somethin' loch 'at will wake ye in th' morn lad. Ah don't remeber, since I'd drank quite a bit afair they did it.