I dunno. I just like him. Canon is Jackie Chan Adventures

[shendude]

Whilst it is jarring to be left with little chance of the vengeance I so dearly crave, I will admit to a certain interest in this little arrangement... A master not even in name, whose only commandment is 'be myself?' How delightfully open to interpretation. We shan't even have to discuss terms, will we?

I think I will enjoy myself immensely, even if I will have to forgo the flaying of my enemies. For now.

Comments

/live action pb'd valmont. Becuase the only jca caps I could get were nightmarishly bad...

[plz_gtfo_dragon]

Well, there goes the neighborhood.

I know, right? Thank goodness for Crackle, they've got the first three seasons in HD now.

[shendude]

Valmont. Your attempts to exercise wit you do not possess is much like a man trying to walk an empty leash.

and really, what other seasons could anyone possibly need?

[plz_gtfo_dragon]

Well, I suppose you'd be the expert on that, Shendu. By now the sound of children's laughter must be as familiar to you as an old friend.

Now now. Season five was worth it to see Valmont as a bus driver.

[shendude]

I am more closely acquainted with their screams, as I will be of yours soon enough.

Hey for all we know he could have been STEALING that bus! ~Criminal Mastermind!~

[plz_gtfo_dragon]

I'm afraid your new master has quite undersold the limitations that this life imposes upon you. Without the turn of their quill willing it, you'll do nothing at all.

[Says he, on the assumption that the kind of person who would want to write about a demon sorcerer would never want to write about a demon sorcerer tearing somebody limb from limb. Nah, definitely not.]

I never once thought of it like that. Maybe those women and children were his new enforcers.

[shendude]

You forget, Valmont. Whilst my motion is dictated by their attention, they cannot alter my nature. That sort of thing is...frowned upon. To put it in terms simple enough for even you to understand... I can write my own story.

That's why he ran when Jackie showed up! Couldn't let THE FUZZ mess up his bus smuggling ring!

[plz_gtfo_dragon]

Ah, but in order for you to write it successfully they'd have to be playing an AU in which you were actually competent. Of course you'll always want to make a pest of yourself, but I think you'll find they can beset you with misfortune, calamity, and your full compliment of usual ineptitudes if you try to act against their desires...

You know how much they pay for a bus in Cuba!? I dunno probably not a lot. But it's something.

[shendude]

You dare accuse me of incompetence when you have done nothing but fail me repeatedly when performing even the simplest of tasks! You are just a man common to many realms, but when I am free from the shackles that exist only on our world I will be invincible!

[Yeah, sure, that's how it works.]

excuse you buses are the new cocaine.

[plz_gtfo_dragon]

It's your archaic, nonsensical orders that were the problem! I was actually doing fairly well for myself after I got rid of you. Perhaps you've forgotten that I'd just gotten through kicking Jackie Chan off a cliff, when you decided to barge back into my body and get back to your usual business of ruining things!

[Because being able to kick a dude in the back is such a mark of what a great criminal mastermind he is.]

[whitescalesbigmouth]

[Wow a dragon wanting vengeance on someone, That isn't something Saft isn't too unfamiliar with.]

...As long as "being yourself" doesn't include harming completely innocent people and purposely being a jerk to people who don't deserve it, I don't see why that would be a bad thing.

[shendude]

I assure you whole heartily, they deserve it.

[Protip, no they don't.]

[whitescalesbigmouth]

...Pretty sure they don't.

It's guys like you that give the rest of us dragons a bad name. We don't exactly like being hunted you know.

[shendude]

[Oh yeah, hit the nail on the head there. It's very likely he's the reason there are no other living dragons in his world, save his freaky minion critters.]

Perhaps, little sister, the solution to that is to be more fearsome yourself.

[whitescalesbigmouth]

If we did that we'd be giving the humans who hate us every reason to be right about what they think about us.

...and I am not your little sister.

[Though she certainly has enough brattish traits to be labeled as one if need be.]

[shendude]

Right, wrong... What matters is the result. Should humans hunt us, we merely need to hunt them in return. And rather more vigorously then they. Listen to big brother.

[whitescalesbigmouth]

No!

How is there supposed to be any peace in the world if there's going to be constant bloodshed. Innocent members on both sides needlessly dying?! It's dumb! And you're dumb if you think that's any sort of way to live with the humans.

[Wow, someone here feels very strongly about this. Then again someone here isn't entirely dragon herself. Oops spoilers, Shendu.]

[shendude]

Watch your tongue little sister. We may be of the same race, but I suggest you show more respect lest you wish to spend the rest of your days as a toad.

[And that's not a bluff. Monkey magic for the animal transformations, super useful.]

Now then. Let us discuss this more courteously, as befits us. I have no particular desire to hunt humans. We could all live in peace... If they could learn their proper place.

[suicidoll]

I think free will in exchange for not obliterating others is a fair trade. You could certainly do much worse than that.

[shendude]

I made no promise not to destroy others... It's just that they are currently out of my reach.

[suicidoll]

Ah, so you have particular targets in mind. Good; I'd hate to end up on someone's hit list without explanation.

Still, there's no guarantee they may appear here, but that's no reason not to enjoy the company already present. As is turns out, there's quite the variety.

[shendude]

Only those that cross or defy me need fear my wrath... But I suggest some terror regardless, to be on the safe side.

Regardless of all that, I have been indulging in the diversity. Quite pleasant.

[suicidoll]

Of course. A reputation seldom travels with you across universes and as such, usually has to be rebuilt as you go along.

It is, isn't it? There's a certain appeal to learning of worlds beside your own. The potential differences in functionality, magic or even the dominant species are always interesting.

[shendude]

Not only interesting but... presenting opportunities.

[suicidoll]

More opportunities than one can count. I get the feeling you're considering several specific ones already.

[shendude]

[Oh what, like conquering a game and ruling it with an iron talon? Is he really that predictable? Yes. Yes he is.]

Perhaps, but as you have noted...there is an awful lot of variety. Who knows what will happen next?