On being dusted off at entirely random intervals

[no_lollygaggin]

Suppose I should be glad you're not dragging me out of the barracks every day. Just wish I knew what got you to thinking of me again. Not like there's some emergency that needs me out in a hurry.

One of these days you might want to ask my name. Just an idea.

Comments

[issen]

[Don't mind the giant skeever mouse waddling by, he's just passing through.

WHAT DO, GUARD?]

[no_lollygaggin]

Kyne's breath, that thing is big!

[TO ARMS! DEFEND THE MEADERY CITIZENS!]

I'd better take care of this myself!

[issen]

[OH JEEZ, THERE'S A THING IN ARMOR ATTACKING HIM!

The mouse whirls, pulling a full-sized broadsword from the scabbard on his waist with his mouth. ARE YOU PREPARED TO FENCE WITH A RODENT?]

[no_lollygaggin]

[What the-? That stops him in his tracks, swearing to Shor and Talos.]

What was in that mead...?

[His blade wavers for a moment, then he steels himself. Hallucination or not, damnit, THIS IS ON.]

I don't know what Oblivion gate you came from, rodent. But I'm going to send you back there!

[issen]

[Honestly, Tachigami has no idea what the human is going on about, but if it's a duel he wants, it's a duel he'll get.

So he lunges, swinging the blade is if it were wielded by a master. Yes, it probably does look ridiculous, but it's self-defense!]

[no_lollygaggin]

Crawling in here was the last mistake you'll m- oof!

[He manages to deflect a blow with his shield and a grunt. Slight problem, here: this mouse-illusion... whatever is really good. And has a bigger sword.]

[You see, guard, this is why you should just take bribes. Like they do in Riften!]

[issen]

[In the opening created by the blowback, the mouse leaps into the air and... lands in the form of a small, white-haired child, the broadsword clutched in his hands like it weighs nothing.]

Enough! For what reason do you attack? I have done nothing to warrant such violence! [You act like giant rats are a bad thing or something.]

[no_lollygaggin]

Huh?

[He peers over his shield, and then lowers it slowly, utterly perplexed. He's surely not one to fight a child, but what child can carry a broadsword like that?]

What kind of magic is this? Who are you? [It's a cautious demand.]

[issen]

Irrelevant. You attacked me without provocation. Why? [He'd talk to you in mouse form, buuuut... Most humans can't seem to understand mouse.]

[no_lollygaggin]

Uh, well, I thought you must be some kind of giant skeever. Sorry about that.

[cheese_for_everyone]

Good to see you again.

[no_lollygaggin]

[ALL THE FACELESS STARING]

...

I'm warning you, Daedra, you'd better stay back. This sword's been blessed by a priest of Talos himself.

[Yes, he actually went to Heimskr. See what you've done to him?]

[cheese_for_everyone]

The blessing of Talos will only get you so far. Even the Dragonborn can't kill a Daedric prince.

[He'll just summon up a chair to sit in and one for the guard.]

But I'm not here to harm your mind, body or soul.

[no_lollygaggin]

Is that so? I've heard about you Daedra and your tricks.

[Don't mind if he pokes the chair with his sword, will you?]

[cheese_for_everyone]

[Not at all he would be sad if he didn't.]

Let me put it this way, if I wanted you dead you would be dead. If I wanted you insane you would be insane.

[no_lollygaggin]

[This is tricky to argue with.]

Then what do you want with me?

[He's got directions and justice, and he's all out of... well, neither, really.]

[cheese_for_everyone]

To talk.

Daedra have been known to have conversations that haven't lead to destruction of mortals you know.

[no_lollygaggin]

If you want to believe those tales. Maybe you're kind to the ones who worship you, but I ain't one of those.

[He's a good Nord. Stubborn as iron ore, especially when he's suspicious.]

[shieldbrother]

Whiterun? Where do you patrol.

[no_lollygaggin]

[He gives a respectful nod on recognising Farkas.]

Well, I'm mostly down in the Plains District, Companion. Especially for the night patrols. There's always work to be done there.

[shieldbrother]

Lots of work everywhere these days, looks like.

[no_lollygaggin]

I hear you. Wouldn't like to ask what kind of work there is in a place like this, though.

[damn_elves]

What is your name, Nord?

[no_lollygaggin]

[This is just his day, isn't it?]

What's it to you, Stormcloak?