Voicetesting (or, Oh God, What Am I Doing?)

[theraggedydoctor]

What's that you have there? Is that for me? Is that an application?

Oh, yes - yes, this is good.

This is very good.

Well, no, it's complete rubbish. Well, not the application. I can't tell if it's rubbish. You've hardly written a word. The idea, though, the idea is just terrible. Look, you can't send me to a Lovecraftian horror city. Okay, I'll admit it sounds very interesting - all those beasties hiding in the fog.

But you can't send me there! For one thing, look at the rules! They say 'nothing bigger than a refrigerator'. What am I going to do with the old girl? She's bigger - much bigger - than a refrigerator, particularly on the inside. I can't just leave her. If I don't bring my box along, I can't tell people I'm a madman with a box, now can I? I'll just be a madman with a bowtie, and that's not nearly as impressive.

Oh, but they don't say what kind of refrigerator, though, do they? No. Maybe they mean a large walk-in deep freezer or the refrigerated compartment of a cargo ship. Maybe one of those long refrigerators you see in the supermarket, where they keep frozen peas.

Now, think. How do those moderators feel about loopholes? Well, not loopholes. Subjecting rules to interpretation. Technicalities. Except that's what loopholes are, aren't they? Right. Yes. Good.

Where was I?

Comments

[toldastory]

I agree, the idea is a bit rubbish. I can't imagine you here really. Of course it'd be brilliant to see you again.

[praystosanta]

Is it like not wanting to do your homework? Not wanting to do an application I mean. I never like doing my homework. Well, most of the time.

[itsadrugbust]

...This is the part where my writer says you ought to follow the rules but more...


[Looks right. Looks left.]

More might get done with interpretation of the rules so to speak. Also why is she shouting "It's Amazing" over and over again?

[timesbureaucrat]

How like a renegade, always looking for ways to break the rules.

[thenightsurgeon]

There are no facts, only interpretation.

[championoftime]

I've always been a fan of creating loopholes, myself, but knowing me you've always known that.

[theraggedydoctor]

Knowing you knowing me, I knew you knew I knew that.

[theraggedydoctor]

Martha Jones! Oh, but it isn't Martha Jones anymore, is it? Except it is, here and there. Except it isn't where I'm going.

You've been busy.

[theraggedydoctor]

The difference is she can't claim her dog ate it. Not unless she said the dog ate her entire laptop, which would be brilliant except - except - that would be very bad for the dog. Well, that, and she hasn't got a dog.

[praystosanta]

She could say that the internet ate it. That's what I'd say if I were her. A dog eating a laptop would be rubbish. Maybe chewing on the cord?

[toldastory]

Well, it's been a long time since I last saw you. A girl's got to have a life.

[kindnesskiller]

Don't do so well without your TARDIS, do you? Might do you good to see how the rest of us live, Doctor.

[championoftime]

Of course you did, I've always been a bit brilliant like that. I can't expect not to be in the future.

[in_the_tardis]

[smirk]

No TARDIS?

Oh, I wouldn't worry, Spaceman. I'm sure there'll be some nice bus service that'll get you 'round wherever it is your mun's sendin' you.

[just teasing. forever]

[theraggedydoctor]

And what a life it is. You're going to tell me all about it over tea. Oh yes, tea, and those little lemon biscuits.

No, not those.

Brownies. Yes, brownies. I have it on very good authority you've gone on the offensive with baking.

[theraggedydoctor]

Best to let her get on with writing it before anything eats it.

[theraggedydoctor]

No idea. Is she still shouting it? Try giving her a little prod with something long.

[theraggedydoctor]

Not breaking rules. Just bending them out of shape a bit.

Oh - I know you. I think I know you. Do I know you? Maybe not. No.

[theraggedydoctor]

I've seen how the rest of you live. I'm a nine-hundred year old Time Lord. I've seen how everyone lives. Well, not everyone. Mostly everyone. A lot of people. A very vast majority.

Oh, all right, a sampling of people, but that's beside the point. Where's Rory?

[theraggedydoctor]

Donna! It's Donna!

- Oh. Bus service. Yes. No. It's a train, actually. You know the Underground? Well, forget it. That comparison would be rubbish. Have you ever been on a monorail? Nevermind if you haven't. It's not like that, either.

[toldastory]

I've gotten better at the cooking. Well, where you're going I have. But in general it's one of my failings.

Now, are you actually going to be fond of them or are you going to fake eat them as well?

[theraggedydoctor]

I don't know if I like brownies. My mundane doesn't know, either. Canon reviewing, that's what we need - oh, but something called 'Meta information' says I like donuts. Well, my actor likes donuts. Except he's me. Well, except he isn't. But he is.

Do I like donuts? Yes. Donuts. The kind with the cream filling. Right. Don't keep giving him brownies if he's fake-eating them. That's a waste of a perfectly good brownie, Dr. Jones.

[toldastory]

Your actor is just a bit like a nine year old, really. It's adorable but worrisome.

And I'm not baking very much at the moment so I'm not giving them to him at the moment.

[kindnesskiller]

Yes, but you haven't experienced it. You can't just go watchin' people scurry about like ants in a farm and say you get it.

[A beat of silence follows his question.] I left him with you, if you recall.

[theraggedydoctor]

You're not Amy. But you are Amy. You're the other Amy. This is very, very -

[Awkward. He's going to do the most sensible thing and start shouting for:]

Rory!