dear_mun | (no subject)

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Yes, I know you're bored, but there's hardly anything I can do about it is there? Why don't you go and work on some of those applications, that'll keep you busy.

[It's sort of impressive how he can sound so condescending without taking his eyes off the wiring.]

Look, I'm terribly sorry but I've got my hands full at the moment. This temporal transponder won't fix itself.

[SIGH.]

If you insist on being a bother, go and fetch us some tea will you? There's a good girl.

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Now there's a face I haven't seen in ages.

I'm sorry, who are - oh. Oh it's you. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised to see you, considering the sorts of places this young lady frequents.

[Have a once-over, Master. It is you isn't it?]

What on earth have you done to your hair?

Don't take that tone, Doctor. Just because I'm crazy and dangerous doesn't mean we can't still be friends.

And I quite like my hair this way, so don't knock it.

If I recall, it was crazy and dangerous that caused our differences in the first place. Still, it is quite refreshing to see you acknowledge it.

[Eyebrow raaaaiise.]

Although less refreshing to see you participate in outdated Earth slang. 'Knock it'? What does this regeneration think it is?

Don't get used to it, the Master in your time is still ages from admitting it even to myself.

The sort of person who enjoys maniacal laughter, among other things.

Why don't you ask nicely, Doctor? 'Please can I have a cup of tea' works much better than 'fetch us some tea'.

Yes, I do wonder if my inability to communicate that concept has led to some of our more ... disastrous misunderstandings.

Which other things, in particular? A good chuckle has never been quite beyond you. Have you perhaps decided to turn your hand to reformation?

Now Jo, I understand the sentiment, but really, you haven't met this girl. Up all hours, knocking things about all over the place, can't make up her mind, always interupting right in the middle of something important -

[OH WAIT THIS SOUNDS A BIT LIKE SOMEONE ELSE WHO HE ACTUALLY QUITE LIKES WHOOPS.]

[Have a sheepish smile because he has missed you so much Jo.]

On the other hand, I suppose it doesn't do to be rude. Although it should be 'Please may I have a cup of tea', Jo, don't forget those A-levels of yours.

Maybe, maybe.

Perhaps a bit. *He sighs.* I'm crazy enough now that it may not be possible, but at least I'm going after people who deserve it when I can.

[She giggles]

Oh, I didn't do English.

Your mun isn't sending you somewhere you'll be stuck, is she?

People who deserve it? No one deserves your methods of 'going after'. If your attempts at reform are at all sincere surely you can see that.

[Oh man but this is awkward. He very much does not approve, but he can't help noticing that you're trying.]

Come on now, buck up. It can't be all that bad. After all, if you can recognise your errors, you might even end up doing a lot of good. [And the clumsy patronising is why people find you annoying Doctor.]

Yes, well, I'm not sure it would have made much difference. [But it is very affectionate teasing.]

To be honest I'm not sure what she intends to do with me, Jo. One moment it's the sandbox, the next she's looking at games that, well. Frankly, I don't think they're appropriate at all.

[He leans down and grins at her because he doesn't want to make Jo worried at all.]

Now, how about yourself? Is your mun treating you all right?

No, but it's better than killing innocents. Which is really my only other choice, these days.

*So very awkward, yeah.*

In my own strange sort of way, yes.

Only choice? Are you mad? [Oh.] Well, yes, you answered that didn't you, no point in belabouring it.

Still. There is no good reason to kill. How can you possibly claim to have reformed with an absurd attitude like that?

Oh, yes. I don't think anyone would dare treat me badly.

There are lots of games that I think would be inappropriate. Tell your mun from me not to consider them if you won't like them.

I am trying to reform. I am also insane enough that it's very difficult to do it.

And there are very good reasons to kill. The main one being that the damned High Council edited my history to win the Last Great Time War, and ir hurts if I don't kill often enough now.

And quite right, too.

I shall pass that along, Jo. It seems she might even take it on board, for all that the wretched girl enjoys bothering me. Apparently she holds you in quite high regard.

I don't suppose you have any alternative suggestions at all? At the moment she's considering a labyrinth, and she simply won't listen when I tell her that you and I have done that already! [He chuckles. Fond memories.]

What?! No - surely they wouldn't be fool enough to - but that's utter madness! Tampering with the Web of Time like that, the harm they could do is unimaginable!

[la la la, ignoring 'last great time war' in favour of being outraged. also ignoring the fact that crossed timelines make all his outrage useless.]

I shall send word to the President at once! To overreact at my own trial is bad enough, but this sort of punishment? Even for a renegade of your status, it's an abomination. There must be a rogue element behind this. Surely they must see that they're doing more harm than good?

Well labyrinth in a lifetime is quite enough.

I don't have any good suggestions at all. Everywhere I know where you can come and go as you please already has you. Several yous in some cases.

Several mes? All in the same place at the same time? Oh no, that won't do at all. As for being stuck in one place all over again - well. I think we can both agree that's not going to work.

No, best to avoid all that nonsense. Stick it out here and get the TARDIS in a bang-up condition myself, I think.

What about you, Jo? The mun very much appreciated your input. Would you fancy another trip, when the old girl's back on her feet?

One of you at a time is quite enough. You argue with yourself too much.

I would love another trip. How long's it going to take you to fix the TARDIS? Can I help?

It was a war between us and the Daleks, Doctor. I'm sure the Council didn't just do it to me anyway.

And it was a majority vote. They made me into the key for a Time Lock, and now my mind is filled with war drums. They get louder and louder until I kill people just to make the noise lessen and the pain stop.

That's because I'm always right.

And, well, you know how these things go. She's a bit temperamental, but we're on the right track.

[Awkward neck rubbing. Definitely wants your company Jo, a tiny bit afraid you might break something.]

Erm... well... yes. Yes I'd love for you to lend a hand. If it's not too much trouble, of course. Hm. Yes, I know. I don't suppose you could - sorry. What was it you recommended again? Oh yes.

Please may I have a cup of tea? [All the grinning forever.]

War with the Daleks? Innocent Time Lords [yes in the face of this larger crime the Master is practically expunged of guilt in the Doctor's eyes] sacrificed in the name of protection! Of all the pig-headed, beauracratic ridiculousness I expected from those baboons on Gallifrey, this goes too far.

This injustice cannot be allowed to stand. [And hanging delicately in the air the Doctor is definitely not asking where he stood in regards to this monstrosity. Because if he was ok with it he may just commit suicide. Seven times or so.]

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omg Joooooooooooooooooo 1/2

oooooooooooooooooooo 2/2

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and now to beddd. sorry he's such a terrible friend!

and bed now. poor messed up master.