Shaky voice test

[owenbloodyharper]

That's Doctor Owen Bloody Harper, sweetheart. I may spend more time cutting apart aliens than I do doctoring the sick, but I've still got my license, so you'd best remember the title.

Now that that's out of the way, how about you find me a pub? Preferably one filled with loose women looking for a one night stand. Hell, at this point I'll even settle for a bloke, if he's pretty enough.

Comments

[captboetied]

And all this time I didn't think you were the type.

[owenbloodyharper]

Yeah, well, it's not something I advertize around The Hub. Wouldn't want you or Tea-Boy to get any ideas.

[captboetied]

Oh, but our ideas are so good. There's this one, where I make Ianto where a UNIT cap...

[owenbloodyharper]

Oi! That's enough right there. I don't want to know the specifics of what you and Tea Boy get up to. I've enough nightmares, thanks much.

[ofdrumsthesound]

Oh great, it's Jack's jerk.

[owenbloodyharper]

First of all, it's Doctor Jerk, to you. And second---never use the words Jack and "jerk" in the same sentence ever again. Put's nasty images in my brain, and no amount of scotch will ever make them go away.

[breakingmyheart]

Discerning tastes as ever, Owen.

[ofdrumsthesound]

. . . alright, point.

[owenbloodyharper]

You know me. Unlike our darling captain, I've got standards.

[owenbloodyharper]

Eh, it's not like I wasn't going to drown myself it scotch anyway. Horrific mental images or no, my kidneys are gonna suffer.

[breakingmyheart]

Oh, absolutely. 'Loose' or 'pretty', so that's two. I suppose 'human' counts as a standard.

[ofdrumsthesound]

Your liver, too, I imagine.

Shame, that. I like liver.

[sadandsingle]

Nice to see you've got your priorities straight, as always.

[owenbloodyharper]

Yeah, well, you'd best stay far the hell away from mine. I'm rather attached to it, y'see, and I'd like it to stay attached for the foreseeable future.

[owenbloodyharper]

It does in this business. Out of the lot of us, I think I'm the only one who sticks to his own species.

[breakingmyheart]

That always surprised me. Out of all of us, you'd need to be the least drunk to start making eyes at a Weevil.

[a_very_neat_monster]

Cutting up aliens, you say?

My, doesn't that sound interesting.

[ofdrumsthesound]

It would be a bit difficult not to be attached to your own liver.

But fine, fine. No snacking on your vital organs, promise.

[owenbloodyharper]

Ey, now. I think you've gotten me confused with Captain Anything-that-moves.

[owenbloodyharper]

What's the matter, Tosh? You upset I didn't go asking about finding my canon-mates, first? I swear that was the third thing on my list, after booze and sex.

[sadandsingle]

A distant third, I expect.

[owenbloodyharper]

No snacking on my non-vital organs either. Or any other parts of me. I don't fancy being anyone's dinner.

[ofdrumsthesound]

Not even a finger or two?

Kidding, kidding. Although I don't see why that's worse than anything else.

[owenbloodyharper]

It's not like I had to go asking in the first place. I knew the moment I showed my handsome face you'd all come running. Flocking like vultures, really.

[owenbloodyharper]

Yeah, but it looses it's appeal after a while.

Why so interested in the cutting bit, anyway? You the sort like likes dissecting things for science, or are you just a morbid sod?