what am i doing.

[icouldbe]

This whole mystical spirit adventure with you, and me, and you, and more importantly me heading down the wacky crazy Internet blackhole of roleplaying and pocket universes and not having superpowers?

Yeah, let's just not and say we did, right? I'm thinking that's the best option and it's behind door number three. How do I know that, you ask? Well, I'm psychic. Door number two is a one way ticket to nope and door number one is a trip to hell no with a side of creepy.

[Stiles is clearly a clever witty genius.]

Comments

[beautifuleverything]

How pessimistic of you, Stiles. You never know, could be fun. I hear there's even one with superheroes.

Even if it's more likely you'd end up somewhere with man eating monsters. Kind of your luck, isn't it?

[icouldbe]

You mean I'm not already somewhere with a bunch of man-eating monsters? Have you looked at where we live? It's kind of a normal everyday occurrence to find someone eaten by something really seriously definitely not human.

[Stiles is pretty sure he's the only normal person at their school, actually, but he won't say that. But he's thinking it.]

[beautifuleverything]

Are you afraid we're going to eat you?

[And that smile says all kinds of horrible things.]

1/2

[icouldbe]

You don't have to say it like eating me is this big insult.

[JEEZ.]

I'm probably better tasting than whatever you guys are --

[icouldbe]

[stiles stop talking]

On second thought, yeah, totally. Terrified.

Keep eating a diet free of Stiles.

[bingsearch]

Don't forget to check the hidden doggy door.

[icouldbe]

The doggy doors I've got aren't hidden. In fact, they're boarded up, with nails and Gorilla Glue and a lot of steel reinforcements.

[bingsearch]

Yeesh. What have dogs ever done to you?

[hotashale]

[Did somebody say creepy~]

You're never willing to just live a little, Stiles. That's not really healthy for a boy your age.

[icouldbe]

Hey, man, you look lost. The creepy stalker that lives underneath the beds of small children registration line is over there, FYI.

[hotashale]

Ouch. [He puts a hand to his chest and for a moment, does look like he's been hurt. Of course, the face drops a second later with a dramatic head tilt.] And after everything I've done for you.

CRASHES and burns wow i have no icons anymore SUP

[freezerburned]

[Eyeroll]

You're such a drama queen.

LMFAO THAT USERNAME IST HE BEST THING I CAN'T

[icouldbe]

I'm a drama queen?

[The most indignant of Stiles. Right here. In front of your werewolf face.]

I think speaking up about the huge problem we're in isn't being dramatic, it's being smart. Unless no one else has a problem with this or thinks it's weird, which wouldn't be the first time someone's been all 'shut up Stiles you're being a drama queen while someone's trying to eat your face'.

I like my face. I don't want it to be eaten, especially not in some weird alternate universe where I might be assaulted by Catwoman or the Borg.

I'M BASICALLY THE WORST PERSON EVER

[freezerburned]

And here I thought you'd welcome a chance to be whipped by Catwoman.

[He smirks, enjoying this.]

Besides which, most places- like the one I've been to- have death clauses. You can't actually die there, idiot.

NO IT'S A STROKE OF GENIUS

[icouldbe]

Voluntarily whipped by Catwoman isn't the same thing as getting your ass kicked.

[Duh, Isaac, stop being dumb.]

And newsflash, not being able to die doesn't change the fact that that's screwed up, dumbass. I'm cool with you guys being the furry escapade and running around not killing me and shit, but I'm not down with being bitten by the crazy train.

weeps into hands

[freezerburned]

You mean you're not used to getting your ass handed to you by now?

[I mean, it happens so often...]

It's more than we get back home. Death is pretty permanent there, and it's not exactly going to be an unlikely event in the near future.

[icouldbe]

Way to be a Debbie Downer.

[With a groan and a slump of his shoulders.]

And just because I get my ass handed to me on a bi-weekly basis doesn't mean I have to enjoy it. Or want it to happen.

[freezerburned]

Just saying, it shouldn't really be a cause for complaint if it's going to happen anyway.

[Gosh Stiles, Isaac is just so rational.]

[icouldbe]

Dude. Haven't enough people died? Why do you even want to think about any other option but no one else dying?

[Stiles' tone takes on that odd strangled pitch, whenever he wants to make a point but no one is listening.]

I'll give you my therapist's card. Go talk about your feelings. Get some ice cream. Buy a massage or get a hot girlfriend or whatever makes you feel better.

[freezerburned]

[That makes him snort in laughter. Way to go.]

Since when have you cared? Besides which, as Scott just loves to point out, I was given a choice. I don't regret this.

[icouldbe]

I don't care about much else but hot girls and my car not breaking down. I'm just pointing out what a Morbid Mary you are and how I already have to put up with Scott and his star-crossed romance and Derek being a dickweed and Lydia being herself and let's not even get into the freakfest that's the rest of our student population.

[Pause.]

-- and seriously? You're going to go all pro-choice this is the change we've been waiting for on me?

[freezerburned]

Look, I don't like it either.

[He's getting a little agitated at this point. Stiles just- talks way too damn much.]

What I'm saying is that you really don't have an option. You go wherever the hell she wants you to, so you'd best stop being a moron and get used to it.

[icouldbe]

There's always an option, no matter what's in front of you. So I think I'll settle for just not. Rah, rah, fight the power man.

[And Stiles surveys Isaac for a long moment before huffing out a sigh in irritation.]

So... besides the supernatural weirdness, sup.

[freezerburned]

[Isaac cocks an eyebrow at him in exchange.]

Just was part of a fucked up post-apocalyptic rebellion for a few months. With Scott and Erica and- you, actually.

[icouldbe]

[ -- huh.]

How cool was I, on a scale of one to ten?

[freezerburned]

Zero. You crapped out before the air raid.

[icouldbe]

Hi-larious. And you're full of shit.

[Somewhat airily.]

I score at least a six point five on a good day.

[freezerburned]

[Isaac just makes a face.]

Then you must have been having a lot of bad days. You were about as useful as- well, you are normally.

[icouldbe]

I need to warm up before I transform into the ultimate symbol of badassery, dude. I can't just wolf out and piss on a fire hydrant and call it a day. It's a process.

[freezerburned]

So how long have you been warming up? Sixteen years?

[icouldbe]

Longer. In utereo.

[No one can make fun of Stiles like Stiles.]

[freezerburned]

Thought so.

[Smug Isaac is smug.]

[icouldbe]

That's supposed to be the part where you go 'No, Stiles, you have at least a ten percent chance of getting laid this year', not where you're a complete jackass with a complete and utter lack of regard for my self-esteem.

I'm wounded. Forever downgraded to the bottom of the pile because I don't growl when I eat.

[CAN YOU HEAR THE COMPLETE WOE IN HIS TONE can you]

[freezerburned]

That would require me actually caring about your self-esteem.

[And he totally doesn't okay. Sure, Scott isn't... a total dick, but Stiles is still pretty far out there on the 'annoying self righteous good guy' brigade.]

Sorry to disappoint.

[icouldbe]

I'll cry myself to sleep every night knowing you and Derek don't tape Doctor Phil for me. Seriously. Wounded. Stabbed through the heart. Bleeding out on the ground as we speak.

Is the sarcasm getting through or should I lay it on a little thicker.

[freezerburned]

[Eyeroll.]

Good luck getting butchered.

[icouldbe]

Good luck having to deal with me haunting your ass for the rest of eternity because you jinxed it, bro.

[freezerburned]

The fact that you'd choose haunting me over the girl's locker room...

[TSK TSK STILES.]

[ex_notathreat982]

I would wish you luck but I'm already learning it doesn't exactly work that way.