[Canon: Seven Psychopaths] Thinking of heading to lastvoyages

[1and7]

Honey, do you want some help? You've got a bad case of being a crazy fucking bitch. It's nothing to worry about, I mean, I hear Doctors can, like, fucking lobotomise you and shit. Yeah. That sounds good. We'll get you a lobotomy and fix you right up so you're not such a psycho-bitch.

Hey, never say I do nothing for ya.

Comments

COME TO OUR SPACESHIP! WE HAVE...COOKIES! AND VAMPIRES!

[likeamonster]

I really don't think lobotomies work that way, but hey, what do I know.

DO YOU HAS GUNS?

[1and7]

You sure about that, man? A needle through the fucking eyeball and into the brain would fuck you up pretty bad, so it'd probably knock the bitch right outta somebody. Even if it didn't, I've never heard of a vegetable that's a psycho bitch.

WE HAS A GODDAMN SHOOTING GALLERY

[likeamonster]

Got a point there. But these writers can be pretty determined.

WHEE~! BILLY'S GONNA PARTY!

[1and7]

Yeah, but not as determined as me.

As I.

Ugh. Fuck grammar, man. Bunch of bullshit.

OH. SWEET. GOD. YES.

[keepsthemsafe]

The fuck is my writer so excited to see you. [Shane is annoyed by this. Very much so]

I LITERALLY ONLY JUST SAW THE MOVIE AND AM ULTRA RUSTY AND YEP.

[1and7]

[Don't be jealous, Shane. Billy's still got a limp motherfuck, if you know what I mean.]

Beats me, man. Maybe they wanna blow me, or something. And hey, it ain't my fault they think I'm hot, so don't get mad at me. I'm a victim here.

These two need to be bros. You must come.

[keepsthemsafe]

[Grim] don't you fuckin' talk to her like that.

[He's in your face dude] She doesn't think you're hot.

[Yes she does]

They can hold hands and shoot things~

[1and7]

What? You fucking her or something?

[Billy snickers, beaming like he just shot ever mafia don and yakuza boss in the country.]

Dude, don't get so attached to a chick. Your cock'll fall off.

I need this friendship in my life. N E E D.

[keepsthemsafe]

[Shane's face screws up into something vaguely similar to Kermit the frog's unhappy face and he takes a deep breath.]

She's gettin' me what I need. That's enough for you to know. What about yours?

[espanola]

That's a little primitive. You wouldn't prefer something more elaborate?

[1and7]

How the fuck is that primitive?! It's goddamn surgery?! I can't shoot lasers out of my cock, kid, so give me a fucking break, here.

[espanola]

It's old surgery. Catch up a few decades; there are new techniques.

. . . That sounds like it would be incredibly painful.

[1and7]

I've got better things to do.

Heh. Yeah. It'd probably be like passing a kidney stone.

[espanola]

Such as?

Yes, except very, very quickly.

[1and7]

Like... uh... I dunno. But I'm sure I've got something to do.

Not in that game, but had to comment because THIS MOVIE!

[soyed]

So you want her to go retard? You do realize that without a brain you're just going to be floating around without a voice right?

IT WAS SO GOOD!

[1and7]

But that'd be pretty fucking cool. I'd be like a ghost, or something.