dear_mun | (no subject)

Is it really that bad?

No, but it's just been a while since she played me, and she has ideas now, and they make me worried.

Shit man. I'm sorry.

Funny how fickle people can be, isn't it?

My mun just has issues since last season, and even more so now.

It can't be that bad, Blainey.

It was terrible, Coop. Terrible!

I know you've been going through a hard time, Blaine. You can talk to me.

How could someone not be interested in you, Blaine?

Because I'm just me? [Blaine offered Sebastian a small smile.]

You're far too modest, Blaine.

You're flawless.

[Blaine doesn't feel flawless right now. Actually, he feels the exact opposite of flawless. This isn't modesty talking.]

I'm hardly flawless. I'm about as far from flawless as you can get. I don't deserve that pedestal.

[Nothing Blaine could do would take him off that pedestal for Sebastian. Nothing.]

Oh? and why don't you think that, Blaine?

Because I'm a terrible person.

[He doesn't add more than that. He can't. What else is there to say about it?]

Why?

[he's genuinely concerned.]

[Blaine glanced at Sebastian, debating internally. They were friends of sorts, right? He could talk to him. And here, Sebastian, have it all in a frenzied rush because Blaine needs to say this all out loud:]

I cheated on Kurt. I hurt him, and I've spent months wanting him back, and being miserable and pining for him, but when I saw him a few days ago, I realized. That. [Deep breath.] We work better as friends. And I don't want him back.

[Though the first comment shocked him, the second one made his day.]

You don't want him back? Thought he was your soulmate, Anderson?

He is my soul mate. He'll be my soul mate until we both die. There's no one that understands me better than him. He is my other half.

[He could spend days spouting off romantic cliches about Kurt, but that didn't answer his question, did it?]

It took months being apart and 10 minutes on an ice rink to realize that I love him, but I stopped being in love with him the moment I said yes to a random hook-up. I just didn't realize that until then. And that makes me scum, and the reason why flawless will never be in my vocabulary.

[He shut his mouth. He had to learn about overtalking his stay.]

[Glad he stopped talking about how much he loved Kurt. Because. Ew.]

You know what? Falling out of love with someone isn't that abnormal, Blaine. I know tons of people that happens to. You can't keep blaming yourself for it. Your heart wants what it wants, and if it doesn't want Kurt anymore, well... it doesn't. There's nothing you can do about it.

Move on

Yeah, I know. Moving on is just hard. I was thinking about applying to NYADA, but I think I'm just sticking to my original NYU plan. Or UCLA. What do you think?

[Have a bad attempt at a subject change.]

I'm actually headed to Julliard for music. Focusing on Voice and piano. Why don't you apply there? You have the talent to get in that's for sure.

[He doesn't care. He's talking to Blaine. That's all that matters.]

[He looked at Sebastian with a little bit of surprise.]

I didn't know you played piano. What other secret talents do you have I should want to know about?

Oh yeah. I play piano, cello, and clarinet. I also know ninjitsu, and I can dance ballet, jazz, and tap.

[Blaine's impressed, he can't help but be. He's grinning widely now. Because wow.]

I am suitably impressed, Bas. May I ask to listen to you play or dance sometime?

[He's got a lot of secrets, Blainers. You just need to let him share.]

Of course you can, Blaine. Name a time and a place, and I'm all yours.

[And the nickname gives him butterflies]

And please, never stop calling me Bas.

[He gave Sebastian a sideways glance at the comment, but the smile doesn't dim.]

Sometime during break? I think I could fit you in my incredibly busy schedule~

[Total lie. Blaine has no life these days. Glee, and then back home, moping. But maybe it was time to change that now. Try and make new friends. Or in this case, make them better friends.]

You feel like 'Bas' to me. Don't you think?

That smile is so perfect, Blaine. It lights up a room.

And I'm yours whatever day you want me.

[Bas doesn't either. He rehearses, works out, plays lacrosse and sleeps. Seriously. He needs a life.]

Blaine, you can call me anything you want.

[Blaine ducked his head. Here Sebastian, have some more of that 'bashful schoolboy' you enjoyed so much before.]

I, uh, thanks, Bas.

I'll txt you later about which day works best?

[He can't handle it. He just can't!]

Still adorable.

Sounds good. I hope this isn't the last time we talk before then though.

[His face turned curious.]

What's adorable? And no, we can talk before then. If you want to, I mean. I like talking to you.

Your bashful schoolboy thing, that you still do. Adorable.

I'd love to talk to you before then, Blaine. I enjoy talking to you as well.

Oh.. I don't mean to. I never meant to in the first place.

There's always text!

[With a grin, Blaine fished out his phone from his pocket and sent Sebastian a txt: how does friday night sound]

It's still cute. And super hot.

Text? really Blai-

[looks at his phone, shaking his head. Txt: That sounds perfect.]

[Blaine still wasn't used to someone bluntly calling him cute, and 'super hot,' and as much as he knows Kurt thought he looked good, he hadn't said it as freely as Sebastian did. It was a new feeling. Definitely not a bad feeling.]

Thank you for distracting me, by the way. I appreciate it. You made me feel better.

[Sebastian will always tell Blaine how he looks. And how Blaine makes him feel.]

Anything for you, Handsome.

[Now you have him flustered, and he leaned over, touching a hand to his shoulder. Innocent gesture of thanks, honest!]

Well, thanks. If you ever need anything...

[Flustered Blaine is the cutest Blaine.]

You too. Any time. My phone is always on, Blaine. Call or text, got it?

[Blaine slowly nodded. He could do that. Making a promise like that felt too easy. Something about Sebastian wanted to make him trust him. Grinning, he glanced down at his phone, typing out a second txt: day or night, you promise?]

[txt: I promise. Cross my heart and hope to die, Blaine. And he truly means it. His crush on Blaine runs quite deep.]

[Blaine believes it. Blaine couldn't lie -- he's missed talking to Sebastian. It was mostly his fault, Blaine knew that -- distance seemed like a better idea, but... It was kind of dumb, wasn't it? Impulsively, he leaned over and wrapped his arms around Sebastian and hugged him.]

[Sebastian was slightly shocked. Blaine had never hugged him before. The only physical contact they'd had were shoulder touches, and those were quite rare as it was. But a hug... it felt nice. The taller Warbler returned the hug, a huge smile on his face.]

Edited 2012-12-17 21:31 (UTC)

Thank you.

[The words were muffled against him, and Blaine didn't want to move. He took a breath, and let it out slowly. He should have done this sooner. Sebastian was a good hugger.]

Anytime.

[Sebastian wasn't planning on letting go any time soon. He was hugging Blaine, and this was something he wanted to enjoy.]

[Was there such thing as hugging someone for too long before it became inappropriate? Blaine didn't know, but he finally decided to pull away from him, just in case.]

So... I'll txt you later then?

[Smiling, though somewhat sad the hug ended.]

Definitely.

Well. Thank you. Again.

[He stepped back to leave, smiling, not taking his eyes off Sebastian. He didn't actually want to say goodbye to him.]

You're quite welcome, Blaine.

[Catching his eyes, Sebastian walked over to Blaine. He was single. So he could do this.

Bringing a hand to Blaine's cheek, he cupped it, and closed the distance between the two of them, kissing the shorter Warbler.]

Bas, I--

[Blaine's words cut off when Sebastian kissed him, and he froze, momentarily surprised. He only let himself think about it for seconds before kissing back, slowly, and leaning into the hand on his cheek. ]

[Sebastian wrapped his other arm around Blaine's waist, pulling him closer, deepening the kiss. He'd waited a long time to be able to do that. And it was well worth the wait.]

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Hi I love you~

I can see that. Paid account. What. why? And... why else?

Because you are awesome~

You're amazing and I love you.

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so.many.icons

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