[Homeless][Once Upon a Time AU] Cogsworth isn't happy he's been put in the headspace corner.

[servesnopurpose]

 If I wanted to gather dust, I would go back to being a clock. And yes, 'alternate universe' nonsense or not, I do remember now! And I'm not pleased by that one teensy bit.

I'm perfectly fine remaining as the head of La Rose Enchantée or to be put to use around this 'Dreamwidth' facility.

And no more jail memes! One was quite frankly enough for my lifetime, and neither Lumiere or I should need to sacrifice anything to get me out of false abuse charges.

Comments

[burningamour]

Dust I am not so certain of. Spiders, however... I see you have grown well acquainted with them.

Do you always carry three at one time?

[servesnopurpose]

I- S- Spiders?! [... what. Lumiere. no. what?]

[burningamour]

Come now, Cogsworth. Surely you must have noticed the one on your head by now.

[servesnopurpose]

[He's going to clam up now and stay very still.

Count down the seconds 'til launch:

1...

2...

Perfectly on time, the man frantically pats at his head in a fashion that would usually be seen being done by little girls.]

Get it off of me, Lumiere!

[burningamour]

Just the one? That hardly seems fair when you consider the others, don't you think?

[servesnopurpose]

Get them all off of me! [His voice has gotten significantly louder.]

[burningamour]

[He draws a sigh. You never were much fun - although this has proven amusing enough. Lumiere pretends to brush the non existent spiders off.]

I see your dislike of spiders lives on but what of the queen? She is responsible for... everything, is she not?

[servesnopurpose]

[He pauses for a moment, stiff as a plank, lips pursed tightly.

And then when he's sure they're all gone, he loosens up and sighs, brushing himself off just in case.]

Personally, I prefer her over Gold. Perhaps it may have flown over your empty brain, but the Queen is the reason we're human again.

[burningamour]

But at what cost? Perhaps your lack of heart has made you forget what so many others have lost.

[Lumiere looks at his hands thoughtfully.] Could it somehow fix things... I would settle for wax.

[servesnopurpose]

You- You'd rather-

[He's astounded and confused.]

We lost everything, Lumiere! We were practically deceased.

[burningamour]

I know!

... I know. But for the others, it is but a small price to pay.

[servesnopurpose]

Yes, well... That choice is never going to happen; we shouldn't dwell on it.

[Truthfully, Cogsworth quite liked his new life in Storybrooke. Yes he wasn't a butler, but he managed a restaurant and he just about got the same amount of respect- if not more. He liked the pace and not having to manage such a large estate... He liked being human again.

He just wasn't sure he'd make the right choice if ever offered it, even though he knew it was right. He felt bad, but he wasn't about to show it over a metaphorical matter.]

Will we change back is likely the better question.

[burningamour]

Should we stay here I cannot tell. This world, she is unlike our own. The most mysterious deviant I have met yet... [They should be definitely cautious.]

You wish to stay at the restaurant? [Cogsworth needn't mention it for Lumiere to know he's happy in Storybrooke.]

[servesnopurpose]

No, no, of course not...

[And then he pauses. Who is he kidding? Now isn't the time to be lying to friends.]

You had all of the women, the looks, everything... You have a reason to wish to go back.

[burningamour]

Not without a friend, mon ami.

[servesnopurpose]

Not without a- I- well.

[He's a little flustered at the dedication.]

You should be lucky that you have Babette, or Mrs. Potts.

[burningamour]

Who would that leave for you?

[servesnopurpose]

I'm sure it won't be hard to find some better staff, hm?

[He's joking, obviously. As much as you flirt with other and you cause some trouble, Lumiere, he knows you're damn good at your job.]

[burningamour]

[Only because you hound him.]

I am telling Chef Bouche you said that about him.

[servesnopurpose]

... Now now, we don't need to be so rash.

[Heh. please don't.]

[burningamour]

So then it is agreed, we are staying.

[servesnopurpose]

[A nod.]

If the others wish to also, then we are staying.

[He knows he did something right to have a friend like you.]

[burningamour]

[Funny, he could say the very same about you, you arrogant bastard.]

I believe we have a service to tend to, non?