(no subject)

[conspiracytheories]

Hey Lady?

Look if you're some kind of Fed - I didn't do anything. Nothing to justify being left here anyway. If I wanted to hide out somewhere I'd go to Monday. I mean you have aliens in here, real aliens. Fine, maybe if they were closer to the Close Encounters kind it wouldn't be so bad but they've both got really sharp swords. No amount of late night movies on SyFy can prepare anyone for that.

And let's be completely honest here - you don't have the time. Sure, you kid yourself but we both know better. So why don't you just take a break, kick back with something that isn't two dollar bottles of wine (for which you should be ashamed of yourself for even having in your house) and just leave me be?

Seriously, it'll work out for the benefit of both of us.

- Mozzie

Comments

[wallets]

Two dollar bottles of wine? Ouch.

[conspiracytheories]

It is truly one of the greatest crimes of our generation.

[conspiracytheories]

I take that back - boxed wine is the greatest. Then the two dollar bottles. Did you know they're packaged in plastic?

[wallets]

Are there even corks at that price? I think you have to pay more than two dollars for corks.

[conspiracytheories]

Screw tops. Like I said - travesty.

[wallets]

Yeah, I don't know how you're going to survive that one, Moz. What if you're forced to drink it?

[conspiracytheories]

You're not supposed to say things like that, Neal. What if she gets ideas? Now that we're actually in their heads there's no place that's safe.

[wallets]

I guess it's a good thing mine belongs to a wine club, then.

[no okay but seriously:]

You'll be fine.

[conspiracytheories]

That's just not fair. How come you get every good deal and I'm stuck with the short end of the stick even here?

( mozzie is always serious. )

The thought's appreciated, really. Best I can do is go into hiding and hope this strange urge of her's passes quick. How long do we want to give it?

[wallets]

Some people just have good luck.

What, are we taking bets, now?

[conspiracytheories]

It's your hair, isn't it? I still can't believe you talked me out of wearing a toupee.

Call it a friendly wager. We can put a bottle of your wine at stake, seeing as you have plenty and I have none. You could be Robin Hood - helping out those less fortunate than yourself.

[wallets]

Mozzie, I'm going to be honest with you because we're friends, and I care about you - but that toupee looked like a rat died on your head.

But, fine, alright. One bottle of wine, your choice, if she gives up within the month, Little John. Or is it Friar Tuck?

surprise 2/3

[wallets]

No, definitely Friar Tuck.

[wallets]

Either way, I still didn't catch what you're putting on the table. I am pretty sure I don't want to win a bottle of her corkless wine, thanks.

[conspiracytheories]

I had more than one!

[conspiracytheories]

And I'll have you know that I came third in quarterstaves at the local Renaissance Faire.

[conspiracytheories]

Name your own price then, and she'll agree to it. She's not completely unreasonable, just a little sadistic now and then.

[wallets]

I had no idea about you and Faire. It's like I'm seeing this whole, other, ye olde side of you. Not sure if I'm feeling it.

As for the price, I have an idea, but I'll get back to you on it. I still have at least the month, right?

[conspiracytheories]

We all have our secrets, Neal. I'll respect yours if you respect mine.

Right. I'd be open to extending it further into September but I don't think that'll be necessary. But now you've got me concerned - she and I both like to know what we're getting into before we get into it.

[wallets]

What's that you were just saying about secrets?

[conspiracytheories]

This isn't a secret, it's more of a business detail.

[wallets]

This is pretty out in the open for a business deal.

[conspiracytheories]

You're trying to be a straighter man. It comes with the territory my friend.

[wallets]

You're not.

Okay, okay, just tell her she has something I want. She'll understand.

[conspiracytheories]

Never. I feel like I'm being corrupted just taking money from the Feds after I help them on a case.

That, she says, is agreeable.