homeless, not looking, voice-testing

[totallynotbatman]

Are you sure this is a good idea? You haven't even seen the most recent movie, how do you even expect to accurately portray me?


Don't you have other things you could be doing with your time? I have things I need to do. I don't have time to play to your whims.

Comments

[manofiron]

I don't think it's accuracy they're worried about.

[totallynotbatman]

Ah. [Of course. It's you. Ignore the eye-narrow, Bruce just has a thing.]

What are they worried about, then?

[manofiron]

[ Of course it's him!

Wait. What did he do now? ]

Nothing. That's the problem. If they were worried, they might actually stop and leave us alone at some point.

[totallynotbatman]

[Bruce is generally weary of Tony Stark since that one time at that benefit with the canapes and champagne. He doesn't like to talk about it.]

I guess you're right. That's why you're the genius, huh?

[manofiron]

[ That's the price of being a billionaire, Bruce. Sometimes benefits get a little rough. ]

You got it. Also, that name? Not fooling anyone. Just FYI.

[totallynotbatman]

[He still has scars.]

What name? I don't know what you're talking about.

[manofiron]

[ Battle scars, Bruce. Battle scars. ]

Bit of advice? Playing dumb never works. Even when you think it will.

[totallynotbatman]

[Not the kind of battle he enjoys.]

Maybe not for you, Stark.

[leftthenest]

But you're totally not Batman, so you have more time to be here than he would, right?

[totallynotbatman]

Yes. But I am a very busy man. I don't know if you've heard of Wayne Enterprises, but it's kind of my thing. I own it. And, therefore, run it.

Doesn't leave much time for dilly-dallying.

[leftthenest]

You're not the only one running it: it'll function without you for awhile. Besides what happens here doesn't affect anything back home. Including the passage of time.

[totallynotbatman]

Like Narnia?

Sounds magical.

[leftthenest]

I had no idea you were a Chronicles of Narnia fan.

[totallynotbatman]

Everyone's read The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.

[leftthenest]

Not everyone. I'm sure some people only read the SparkNotes version.

[totallynotbatman]

You're talking about yourself, aren't you?

[leftthenest]

Please. Like I'd ever be allowed to slack. I meant my classmates.

[totallynotbatman]

Of course.

[holyroleplaybatman]

Hey Bruce. I heard the new movie wasn't so great, anyway.

[totallynotbatman]

Well, that's....comforting, I suppose.

[holyroleplaybatman]

I just know people keep telling me not to see it. So we're probably not missing anything, you know?

[totallynotbatman]

Hopefully not.

[holyroleplaybatman]

Glad I could help, Bruce. Say, we should go see a movie! That'd be swell.

[totallynotbatman]

Not much time for movies, unfortunately.

[holyroleplaybatman]

Don't I know it. But Bruce, maybe I meant... see a movie. You know. Like how we're always going fishing?

If you'll allow. He read the name.

[laughingalltheway]

... Why would you be the Batman? That wouldn't be funny at all.

[totallynotbatman]

I can't help but agree.

[laughingalltheway]

Hm, well, see, you still have your uses, of course. I'd even go so far as to call you just as famous, hm? That party of yours was certainly a blast to be at, a shame I didn't see you. Do you hide, hm? Do you cower? No, you don't strike me as the type, perhaps you're hosting parties and not attending? Awfully cold of you, hm? Why, we should shake hands sometime, as, hah... hee hee...

[ He laughs for a few moments before speaking again. ]

Old and new owners of Gotham?

[totallynotbatman]

I was otherwise occupied.

And I'd rather not.

[laughingalltheway]

Hm.

No wonder you're falling so fast in the popularity polls, such a dry, bland fellow you are. I'm not certain if the city is more entertaining with or without people like you. I suppose that's something to, ah, think about.