Still getting creeped out by his mun.

[awesomeintheory]

[Annoyed theoretician is highly annoyed.]

Look, can I just get back to worrying about Swerve? This mess has him all torn up, you know, and I could be looking after him instead of listening to your crazy exposition.

Yeah, I know I'm a theoretician. That doesn't mean I have to like everything you come up with based on the titbits you pick up in every new issue. We went into this figuring you'd just learn about me as I learnt about me, not that you'd take off with these wild ideas every time something new turned up.

Now this thing with my gun. And The Institute. Look, if there's an Institute involved, I probably don't remember it. And if it's anything like what you're dreaming up, I don't want to remember it. With a mind like yours, you should be playing with those DJD guys. [He really means that.]

And stop it with the Firefly talk. Seriously. I'm not River. I'm not even remotely like River. [He's pretty sure. Just because they both have amnesia and surreal combat skills doesn't make them that much alike, right? Right.] You make me want to just fill all the gaps with silica and leave it lie.

Comments

[shutthehellup]

Yeah, you're definitely a far cry from a weird naked human in a box, that's for sure.

[Just gonna...try and ignore what's happened and cope with joking, yeah. Yeeeeeeeeah.

Though someone worrying is kind of nice.]

[awesomeintheory]

Gee, thanks for noticing.

[Pause. He's not good at being comforting, is he? He isn't sure. He's never tried to talk it out. He was kind of a jerk to Eyebrows that one time in the air ducts. Will a hand on the shoulder work again?]

[shutthehellup]

Hey, hey, that's a good thing! I gather that the River person is badass, but given that she's...well, a human, I think she would've had some trouble with those big nasty guys that were following you.

[It's a little weird, but, hey, it'll work. Sort of.]

[awesomeintheory]

Yeah, those guys….

[Subject change, mofo.]

How's it going getting the bar back up and running?

[shutthehellup]

I, uh... Dunno yet. I think I've still got rivet duty... Maybe.

[officer_ocd]

[Ah, yes. Just what the Lost Light needs. Not only another dangerous, recently-revived mech with a gun, but a dangerous, recently-revived mech who has lost his gun.]

[He blames Rodimus.]

Is there a problem here.

[He means the gun, but, well....you. In general.]

[awesomeintheory]

[Skids isn't revived! He would've had to be in a coma to be revived, and he wasn't in a coma.

Probably not. Bots in comas don't etch messages into the ceilings of their shuttles with torches. Or he's pretty sure they don't.]

Sure, Magnus. With my creepy, sadistic mun.

[officer_ocd]

[Hairsplitting! Bah! And the only hairsplitting Ultra Magnus approves of is about semicolons, not semi-consciousness.]

...Magnus.

[Are we buddies? When did that happen? Ultra Magnus did not get the memo that we were buddies, Skids.]

You mean gun. [Here. He fixed that for you.]

[awesomeintheory]

[Hey, Skids remembers a time when you smiled and cracked jokes, Magnus.]

What? No, no, my mun. With an M. The one trying to write really unsettling speculative fic about how I wound up like this.

do not even note the meta-irony here

[officer_ocd]

[Lies, damn lies and you likely have a head injury, Skids.]

I see.

You are upset about....fiction.

far too busy LOLing to note

[awesomeintheory]

More like… [Headscratch here.] More like it bugs me the mun's taking off with these ideas instead of just waiting for me to figure things out like it was supposed to go at first. Y'know?

move along, nothing to see here

[officer_ocd]

So.

Envy, in short. Of this imaginary 'mun' person.

[awesomeintheory]

…What? Envy? How d'you figure that?

[officer_ocd]

[Leave the scowling to the professional, Skids.]

Because this mun is attempting to put pieces together, to make progress, while you have....not.

[awesomeintheory]

[Hey, Skids is great at scowling and he doesn't even have a licence for it.]

What, just because I'm fine leaving it to the writers? [And not at all because the ideas his mun has terrify him. The worst part is what if they turn out to be true? Nope, not at all.]

[officer_ocd]

[That's another thing for a later time, Skids: unlicensed frowning.]

And why is that, Skids? Why aren't you trying to figure it out?

What are you hiding?

[awesomeintheory]

I don't know if I'm hiding anything. And it isn't like all that creepy stuff my mun thinks up solves that problem.

[Stop making him think about this, Magnus. It leads to dark, dark places. He was happier with the pointless slashfic.]

[officer_ocd]

That's it. Exactly. You subconsciously know, so you are actively trying not to know.

[He may not be Rung but he knows The Criminal Mind.]

So you prefer ignorance to the Truth. [Tsk. Wrong answer, Skids.]

[Do not talk to him about pointless slashfic. Please. Do not even go there.]

[awesomeintheory]

I prefer finding the truth in my own time, dammit.

[Too much Rodimus-tries-to-get-Magnus-to-unwind?]

[officer_ocd]

And what if someone dies in the interim. Because of your...issues.

[Rodimus, Drift, being interrupted at a little light reading--it's been a rough few months for Ultra Magnus's dignity.]

[awesomeintheory]

Given that I'm in a back seat right now while we get the DJD and a monster in the basement, I'll deal with that when we come to it.

[But don't think his mun hasn't contemplated a couple dozen ways the things he can't remember could come back to haunt the Lost Light. Connections between fragments of information he sincerely hopes are just in the mun's head.]

[idle_time]

Now see here, ya chowderhead, that's no way to talk to your mun! You just wait 'till your father gets home!

[awesomeintheory]

…What.

[idle_time]

Do they speak Cybertronian on What?!

[awesomeintheory]

You know, I dunno. Never been there.

[idle_time]

Well then, Autobot-o-kemosabe, do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth?

[awesomeintheory]

I'm hearing the words, but they aren't making sense strung together like that. [For one, he doesn't have a father.]

[idle_time]

*Wreck-Gar looks curious for a second, then perks up*

Lightbulb!

There are those that call me... Wreck-Gar! Leader of the Junkions! We talk TV!

[awesomeintheory]

… [Nope, Skids still can't make heads or tails of this.]

Wait. If you talk TV, why'd you ask me about Cybertronian? No, on second thought, never mind that. [He's on the fast track to a headache here, between his mun and Magnus and Wreck-Gar.]

[idle_time]

*head tilt*

You mean you've never heard of television? My God, man! What do you watch?!

[awesomeintheory]

…The other bots in the bar?

[idle_time]

Is it a place where everybody knows your name? And you're always glad you came?

[awesomeintheory]

Well. Uh. Yeah, actually.

[idle_time]

Well then, party on, dude!

[awesomeintheory]

Sure thing. [Why does he feel like something has happened here but he doesn't know what?]