dear_mun | (no subject)

[Kronk was all kinds of cute when he was little! And very, very small.]

They're like boy scouts, but you also learn how to talk to chipmunks! And how to get in shape and stuff. [Someone took 'exercise whenever you have time' very literally.]

Oh! Okay, I'm aware of the boy scouts.

You mean, you actually speak with them? In English? The chipmunks?

[Are they by any chance named Alvin, Simon, and Theodore?]

Hah, no! That'd be silly. I speak to THEM in chipmunk.

[And then, it happened.] Squeak... squeaky... squeakums?

[Blink. Blink. Blink blink blink.]

That's...quite the talent you have.

Thanks, pal! I'm not JUST handsome. [Kronk was usually more modest, but he never got this many compliments! It got to his head a little.]

I like to think of myself as...uh. ALSO handsome. And fluent in chipmunk. I don't wanna brag but that's a rare combination!

It is a rare combination! Especially with a talent as rare as yours.

[And the thing is? Alan's not even being at all sarcastic.]

Does the chipmunk thing come in handy?

Don't worry bud, you're a good looking guy too. [Probably not good with chipmunks though. But then, if Kronk where a superhero he would definitely join the bad guys if they offered him like... half a cookie. Or a cake pop.]

Oh yeah, when I want to talk to a chipmunk it's the most useful thing there is!

Well, thank you. I appreciate that compliment.

[Probably a good thing he's not a superhero, then. Although, maybe he'd switch sides again for a dozen cake pops?]

Do you speak to chipmunks frequently?

No problem! I'm...uh. Confident in my manliness.

[Kronk would go back and forth, if each side kept offering more cake pops. He regret nothing.]

Whenever I see a little chipmunk. [Headtilt.] You...uh. You don't think that's dumb, right?

Dumb? No, not at all.

I mean, I was just having a full blown conversation with a bright green flame a fe days ago.

There is very little that is dumb or weird to me, anymore.

[Kronk did this. For five minutes straight.] I'M NOT DUMB!

[If only Yzma was around to hear this!] Yzma's just... just saying that I'm a big, dumb, stupid idiot. [Wibble.] I wonder why she's saying it if it's not true?

You seem to be a lot of things to me - full of life is the first that comes to mind - but I promise. I wouldn't call you dumb.

As for Yzma...well. I don't know her. But if she's so mean to you, why do you let her stay in your life?

[Kronk fidgetted with his oven mitts for a bit longer. So many nice compliments! Always made him a little shy.] That's real nice of you to say that, buddy!

I got to stay with Yzma. She's my boss and...uhhhhh. Stuff. [How to explain that one? Even Kronk himself didn't really know! They where secretly kind of together.]

...Stuff? [Alan knows about stuff.] I see.

Stuff. You know, I think I should show you Yzma's picture! That'll explain it better and stuff. [Poor, poor Alan.]

Do you have a picture handy?

[He's actually intrigued by this Yzma.]

Oh... yeah! Always got it with me. [Kronk took THIS out of his little skirt pocket.]

I...uhh. I hope you won't make fun of me and Yzma. [Everyone else did!]

[Alan looks at the picture for a long moment before handing it back.] A lot of people fear anything that's slightly out of the norm - things that they normally don't understand. They tend to criticize it or worse.

She's...well. She's something.

As long as you're happy...well, why worry what everyone else has to say?

[That was probably really unexpected! From looking at Kronk, you'd probably expect another young, colorfully dressed native. Instead, there was... Yzma in all her horrorfying, ancient glory. They couldn't be more different.]

Yeah! No one else looks like Yzma. [Kronk laughed, before shrugging.] It just kinda happened. I still dunno why she hired ME. I was just walking around the village and then she had everyone lined up and she picked me out of all those other guys!

[Oh, that's putting it lightly! But Alan was trying so very hard not to judge. Even if he didn't get it. Her eyelashes were terrifying! Like spider legs stuck to her lash line.]

No, I don't suspect that a lot of people do.

It might have something to do with the fact that you're a very tall, strapping young man.

[Kronk knew that they where fake eyelashes made out of spider legs! And her 'hair' was fake too. She looked like an actual corpse, during the night. Itwasawful.]

Gee, I wonder if that has something to do with it! That explains a lot. Because...uhhh. I was no one important or anything and then suddenly I got to work for the second most important person in the whole empire!

My papa didn't even trust me to count his llamas.

[Poor Kronk!]

Everyone is someone important. Maybe not to the whole world, but...

[Except, now Alan was important to the whole world. The green flame wanted him to take Superman's place now that Superman was gone. The hell?]

How does your dad feel now that you're the first line of support to Yzma. I'm sure he's proud. Or jealous, maybe. ...would Yzma have been his type?

[Realistically, was Yzma anyone's type?]

Hah... I dunno. [Kronk shrugged his big shoulders, before beaming at him.]

Oh yeah, he was real proud that I got to work at the palace! I dunno what my job really is. Just everything Yzma... that's my job! She rides around on my back, all that stuff. [Good times!]

Are you important? Is that...uh. That why you got those fancy green pants, buddy?

Well, at least she seems light. Physically.

...I...suppose I am important now. I'm not really sure how everything is going to play out yet. I only just acquired the fancy green pants.

Yzma weights nothing! That part's easy.

[Big, vacant smile.] You know pal, that kinda reminds me of when I first got these clothes! I was all excited because I never had new clothes before.

I think Yzma forgot how I'm all... big, though. They're kinda small for me! [Kronk was very innocent.]

(no subject)

greenguardian - 2012-07-21 01:44 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

squeak_squeaker - 2012-07-21 01:51 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

no subject

no subject

no subject

Kronk is so precious!

<33333

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

(no subject)

(no subject)