andy dwyer. (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
brothernature) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
dear_mun2012-01-15 05:34 pm
brothernature) wrote in dear_mun2012-01-15 05:34 pm
Entry tags:
homeless but considering changing that. ( canon is parks and rec. )
Okay, so. Space. Let's talk about space. Why do you want to talk about space, Andy Dwyer? --is what you would totally ask me, so I'll tell you, keyboard... typing... head... lady-person.
I want to talk about space because I want to go to space. And take a tour of the moon, and then a trip to Ur-- [ OKAY HALF HOUR LAUGHTER BREAK. ] Uranus. I would like to take a tour of Uranus.
...But not really, that's a joke. Because a Uranus is a butt. Get it? But I don't really want to touch your butt. That's because I'm married, and you can't touch other people's butts anymore after you marry. There's like a law? Or a force field. Unless you're a butt doctor, then it's cool because it's your job, but only if you're in your office touching the butts. Otherwise: bam, butt force field. I read that on the internet once.
What were we talking about? Right, okay. Space. You should send me and April to space, because we'd be awesome at it. She's smart, and I could fight aliens. Or space bears, if they should happen to exist, which I don't know if I believe. Yet. Because no one can prove them.
[ give andy a moment to address a now non-existent camera crew. look, they should be on this adventure too-- now they're here in spirit. plus, it's kind of a habit now? ]
They totally exist, by the way. People laugh, but if you can't disprove space bears then it's really kind of unfair to say they're not real, you know? They have feelings. I think, maybe. I know they have claws and teeth and they're like forty miles tall, and they're out there. Waiting for the right person to fight them. Waiting for me.
Andy Dwyer: Space Bear Vanquishing...erer. Er. It's got a nice ring to it.
[ AND NOW LIKE HE NEVER PAUSED. ]
So, heretofore in... malum prohibitous... Latining, you should send me, Andy Dwyer, and my wife April to space. [ ...there should be more. ] Vote Andy!
I want to talk about space because I want to go to space. And take a tour of the moon, and then a trip to Ur-- [ OKAY HALF HOUR LAUGHTER BREAK. ] Uranus. I would like to take a tour of Uranus.
...But not really, that's a joke. Because a Uranus is a butt. Get it? But I don't really want to touch your butt. That's because I'm married, and you can't touch other people's butts anymore after you marry. There's like a law? Or a force field. Unless you're a butt doctor, then it's cool because it's your job, but only if you're in your office touching the butts. Otherwise: bam, butt force field. I read that on the internet once.
What were we talking about? Right, okay. Space. You should send me and April to space, because we'd be awesome at it. She's smart, and I could fight aliens. Or space bears, if they should happen to exist, which I don't know if I believe. Yet. Because no one can prove them.
[ give andy a moment to address a now non-existent camera crew. look, they should be on this adventure too-- now they're here in spirit. plus, it's kind of a habit now? ]
They totally exist, by the way. People laugh, but if you can't disprove space bears then it's really kind of unfair to say they're not real, you know? They have feelings. I think, maybe. I know they have claws and teeth and they're like forty miles tall, and they're out there. Waiting for the right person to fight them. Waiting for me.
Andy Dwyer: Space Bear Vanquishing...erer. Er. It's got a nice ring to it.
[ AND NOW LIKE HE NEVER PAUSED. ]
So, heretofore in... malum prohibitous... Latining, you should send me, Andy Dwyer, and my wife April to space. [ ...there should be more. ] Vote Andy!