rule 63!howard u/////u

[strictmachine]

Couldn't be satisfied with just one me, could you? Oh no, instead you have to make sure I'm around, too.

You know, Doll, there's a reason I dress like a man and act like a man and it sure isn't because it's easier. Pretty sure the only reason I get away with it is because I'm too filthy rich for anyone to do anything about it. Well, that and Steve punching out the last idiot who gave me trouble. Not that I couldn't have handled it, but it's nice to have back-up.

Oh yeah, and? --Not really thrilled about your ideas for how I wind up having Tony, either.

Comments

[hellhathno]

Easier is relative.

Good to see you out and about.

[strictmachine]

Well, apparently I don't have a choice about it. Nevermind that I have about a billion things that I could be doing right now.

You're surprisingly hot with boobs. Am I allowed to say that? I'm allowed, I think.

[hellhathno]

You think you're allowed to do anything.

[But she's not objecting at the moment.]

[strictmachine]

Naturally, I'm a Stark. Besides, who ever actually complains when I get the job done so well?

[hellhathno]

Next time, I'll forward them to you.

[strictmachine]

Or my.. kid, apparently.

[fbitchesgtmoney]

(wat)

[strictmachine]

[ the most wary stare. ]

So. Uh. Hey.

[fbitchesgtmoney]

(wat) I've officially had too much to drink. I didn't think it was possible.

[strictmachine]

Not possible. I've tried to drink myself into hallucinating Steve into a girl, it didn't work. Not gonna' argue if you want to share, though.

[fbitchesgtmoney]

Why would you want to hallucinate Steve into a girl? (wait is my Dad a lesbian? Wait. What. Brain breaking in 3...2...1) I can share.

[strictmachine]

Uh, isn't it obvious? I mean, if he's that good looking as a guy, imagine how he'd look as a dame. [ yes, yes your dad!mom..dad? is a lesbian, tony, enjoy! ] --Then bring it here, I can't deal with all this alternate universe nonsense sober.

[fbitchesgtmoney]

Yeah, but he's. And you're. And Mom. (he needs to go find alcohol. multiple bottles. brb. here - have some vodka) So am I your daughter?

[strictmachine]

[ oh thank god. she drinks right out of the bottle, mouth thinning. ]

Nope. Son. 'S complicated, and-- you know, forties, right? I should be-- marrying some guy, settling down, being a happy home-maker or something. That's what people think. Some people, I mean.

[ she lifts a finger, pointing at him. ]

Anyway, this is shit you don't-- You're my kid. You don't need to know this stuff. About me.

[fbitchesgtmoney]

(He's drinking scotch. out of the bottle. Because it's that awkward moment when your dad's your mom and attractive)

If you just married a guy to appease the general public it's not really complicated at all. (okay, he doesn't mean to be snarky. He's frowning though)

I think I should have the right to know. It's not like you tell me anything when you're old. And male.

[strictmachine]

I live like a man in public. I'm not going to marry a guy.

[ she turns the bottle between her palms, frowning. ]

But, you know, there are always people that know, people I work with, that sort of thing. [ she grimaces, takes another long drink, leaning against the edge of a desk. ] And there's always going to be people that want to fix me, like I'm one of my projects.

[fbitchesgtmoney]

Huh. This is...strange. Unexpected. Kind of fucked up. Sorry.

(Another drink. He's trying to not be too weirded out? Because it's a parent. And he doesn't want to be a dick)

Yeah, that's still around. That being gay or transgendered or whatever is wrong. It's more concentrated to religious freaks now. And people who were born in your time. (another drink) What does Steve say?

[strictmachine]

[ S H R U G. ]

Whatever, I'm not exactly the sensitive type, so it's not like I'm traumatized or anything.

[ her mouth quirks at the mention of steve. ]

It threw him off a little at first, but-- Steve's Steve. Thinks he has to protect me, now, or something.

[fbitchesgtmoney]

There's the dear old Dad I know. (why didn't you love me? 8()

You know. I'm not sure what I'm more disturbed about right now. You being a chick, or being in love with Steve.

[strictmachine]

[ she chokes a little on her next swallow, startled, before bursting into laughter. ]

In love with Steve? You're kidding, right?

[fbitchesgtmoney]

(curious look)

Alright, fine. I'll rephrase. You want to fuck him. If he was a chick. However that works.

[strictmachine]

Sure. I mean, you wouldn't? Peggy would kill me, though. Bucky might, too.

[fbitchesgtmoney]

I have.

(rubbing his eyes now) That's a bit awkward.

[strictmachine]

Lucky bastard. I guess at least one of us got the chance.

[fbitchesgtmoney]

So tell me more about you.

[strictmachine]

[ a wary glance again. are we about to get mushy, tony. ]

What's to tell? I'm an asshole who just happens to be a genius alcoholic. Actually, I hear you're a lot like me. .. Just with, you know, different equipment.

[fbitchesgtmoney]

(Of course not. Tony Stark doesn't do mushy)

Yeah, you kind of are an asshole. The you I know. Knew. Was an asshole. A little? My colouring is after you. (shrug~)

[strictmachine]

Well, I didn't exactly have the best role models, myself. So. Uh. Sorry I was so.. bad at it?

[ she reaches up, patting his cheek. ]

I can't make any promises, but I'll.. try to be a better-- whatever I'll be. Dad. Mom. Parent.

[fbitchesgtmoney]

Yeah. You were kind of horrible.

(And then he's eying the hand. And having a drink after]

Pretty bad. That's probably one of the first affectionate things you've ever done for me.

[strictmachine]

Hey, well I never claimed to be parent material.

.. Huh. [ there is not enough alcohol in the world for this conversation. ] I don't, uh. Really know how to be affectionate.