(no subject)

[like_a_lion]

That is not canon and you know it, milady. I would never say such things to Irisviel nor would I harbor such feelings either. Your mind has been polluted by fouls thoughts and whatever those "meme" events you seem so keen on entering me in. Please refrain from such action in the future, as my master you should hold yourself to a higher standard of conduct.

Comments

[maguskiller]

...

[Should he ask?]

[like_a_lion]

To put it simply, she had me confessing to your wife that I was in love with her.

[maguskiller]

[Sadly, nothing can truly make Kiritsugu respond.]

[But let it go on record that this merits it.]

[puppy_lancer]

The hell did she make you say?

[like_a_lion]

The words forced upon me were "I love you" in particular it was said to my former master's wife.

[puppy_lancer]

[He gives her a big grin and two thumbs up.]

Did you go all the way and sleep with her too? If so, then SCORE!

[...He obviously has a different moral standard.]

[like_a_lion]

Of course not. My mun has at least enough common sense to not inflict such things upon me... Though she did have us bathing together.

Why do I sense that he will soon get an Excalibur to the face?

[puppy_lancer]

[He laughs and pats her on the shoulder.]

Don't be disappointed. You're getting there, aren't you?

xD

[like_a_lion]

How dare you speak of Irisviel in such a manner! She would never do such a thing.

Oh just keep on sticking your figurative tail into the figurative electric socket, Lancer

[puppy_lancer]

You know, that's what all the other guys in Emain Macha said about their wives...and they still all slept with me when I asked them politely enough. So don't worry about it--all you gotta do is wait until your Master isn't home and then you can bag her! I'll even buy you a drink to celebrate!

[Half of this is just friendly teasing. Or, at least, what he considers friendly teasing.]

Re: Oh just keep on sticking your figurative tail into the figurative electric socket, Lancer

[like_a_lion]

Please cease such speech. Even if I did desire Irisviel I would never break the convent of marriage she holds with her husband.

Re: Oh just keep on sticking your figurative tail into the figurative electric socket, Lancer

[puppy_lancer]

[His expression turns just a bit more serious.]

...So it's one of those things, huh? Love someone enough not to jump into bed with them. Well, then that just leaves one question--who does she like better? You or her husband. Because if she likes you more, elope with her. Your Master never ordered you not to elope with his wife, so you should be able to do that, right?

[like_a_lion]

No matter how cold and distant her husband may have been, I have no doubt her feelings for him are stronger then anything she and I share.

can we be E-rank romantic luck buddies?

[puppy_lancer]

...

[There's a slight pause...and then he bend over guffawing.]

Man, this is awesome.

[He gets up, gasping for and clapping her hard on the back.]

You're just like me! I can't properly score with any chicks that I love either!

[Sure, he had no problems jumping into bed with one-night-stands, but when he actually ran into girls that he had some emotional connection to...]

lol till she met shirou saber did have crappy luck with relationships

[like_a_lion]

Though I don't believe our circumstances are similar, I do miss my dear Irisviel greatly. She deserved better then the world gave to her.

Re: lol till she met shirou saber did have crappy luck with relationships

[puppy_lancer]

...You think it wasn't worse with Emer or Scathach?

[Emer...definitely deserved a better husband than him. Even if he had loved her more than any other woman, he had still neglected her all the way up until his death. Meanwhile, Scathach was probably still wasting away in her land of the dead...]

And Misaya...she only lived to be 16.

[Sometimes, he found himself jealous of his counterpart. No matter how bad that other Lancer's luck had been, at least he had been able to save Rin Tohsaka.]

Shit, let's just say this world likes screwing good women over.

[like_a_lion]

Sadly it seems you are correct. Irisviel was born for the sole reason of carrying out the Holy Grail War.

[puppy_lancer]

Damn. And I thought it couldn't get any worse than Misaya.

[His Master had been cursed to die should she not acquire the Grail, but to be born just to become a grail vessel...]

If you ever need any help beating up her bastard parents...

[Ever since Misaya's death, parents who abused or abandoned their children had become a berserk button for him.]