What the hell am I doing here?

[stark_naked]

No, I'm serious. This is a legit question.
Why the hell am I here? I mean, yeah, I'm real thrilled you decided to dig me back up, but c'mon now. You're a little late to board the bandwagon here sweetheart. We split like two years ago?
Which was a brutal breakup. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I lost much sleep over it or anything, but damn.

Comments

[allfatherissues]

A little late? [Oh, it takes a lot to resist scoffing at that.] I'd daresay that you're just in time, all things considered.

[stark_naked]

[Hey. No scoffing. You stop that right now.]

Just in time for all the movie hype, probably. I'm sure this is all just a phase.

[allfatherissues]

[All the scoffing! ALL OF IT.]

Exactly. In fact, my mundane is rather hoping it brings more of your kind [read: silly Avenger people] to the situation I've been so-graciously tossed in.

My own feelings on the matter are not quite so enthusiastic.

[stark_naked]

[No! I said no dammit! Stoppit with your face!]

Oh? Well aren't you in luck, you just so happened to stumble across the best of the best. [cue smartass smirk] Although, I was expecting a much more curvy friendly welcoming party.

But I guess you'll do.

[allfatherissues]

The best? Or the most arrogant? [Fine, no scoffing. But have instead the most condescending smile ever.]

Though I am truly sorry to have disappointed.

[stark_naked]

[I'm not that arrogant. Maybe just a little.] ..both?

[Your face. Just stop. Although this is a little bit more tolerable.]

Eh, I'm resourceful.[shrug] I can make do with that I've got.

[allfatherissues]

We'll see how confident you are, then, when your mundane tosses you into some ridiculous circumstance beyond your control. For your own sake, you should hope that you escape their attentions soon.

[stark_naked]

Phfft

Oh c'mon. I'll admit, shit can get pretty crazy, but you don't have to cry about it. It can't be that bad. [Tony has no sympathy it seems] you gotta learn to lighten up, y'know? Live in the moment or whatever. Make the best of it no mater how much it sucks.

Unless...well, unless it really does suck that bad. Then you might be screwed.

[doyoufondue]

I don't think it's ever too late for bandwagons.

[stark_naked]

Coming from you.. I guess that's understandable.

[doyoufondue]

...I'm sure I'm not the only one that thinks so.

[stark_naked]

Yea, well I don't really care what anyone else thinks. That's besides the point.

I don't like it. I hate having to play catch up.

[doyoufondue]

Maybe you should a little.

You don't even have that long to catch up on. A guy like you could be up to speed real quick.

[stark_naked]

[siiigh] But that's all unnecessary work that I shouldn't have to concern myself over. I've got better stuff to do then stupid research.

And it's hardly even research at that. All it is, is just sitting around and watching movies for the most part. I swear it's giving me migraines.

[doyoufondue]

I would have thought you'd like watching movies about yourself.

[stark_naked]

Oh I do, don't get me wrong. I look amazing on screen.
But.. I gotta admit, I can only look at myself for so long.


...So I started watching you instead, y'know, for a little bit of something new.

[doyoufondue]

...Me? I don't know if that counts as 'new.'

[stark_naked]

Well, no.. I guess not.
But everyone can appreciate the classics.

[doyoufondue]

Even with the ridiculous musical number? Don't laugh.

[stark_naked]

[so trying not to snicker right now...]

[stark_naked]

CKmon, you gotta admit...it's kinda catchy.

[doyoufondue]

Tony, hold that laugh in.

You're right though. It is catchy.

[stark_naked]

[He's trying, okay? Give him a litle credit at least.]

Look, I may have to take your orders out in the field, but during off duty time.. I think I'm entitled to laugh. [Tony just cracks a smile at that.]

[doyoufondue]

[ Okay. He'll let you off the hook. ]

Alright, alright.

[stark_naked]

Phffft~

[At leat he isn't falling over and laughing. Tony knows how to keep himself fairly composed.]

I'll admit though, those girls were pretty hot. I mean, like..smokin' hot, even for old timey chicks.

[doyoufondue]

[ The composure is appreciated. Steve's trying not to look embarrassed. ]

Oh. Yes. They were very lovely ladies.

[stark_naked]

[You're not trying very hard there Steve.]

Lovely doesn't quite cut it. That's like.. I don't even know, flowers are lovely. Ladies are hot.

[doyoufondue]

[ What if he turns his head and looks elsewhere so you can't see embarrassed face? Is this trying harder? ]

Ladies are stunning.

[stark_naked]

[Better, but it's not helping. It's kinda cute when you get all bashful like that.]

Alright, I can let you slide with that one I guess.
I'm going to have to seriously break you in and update that vocabulary of yours. You're over due for a tune-up.

[doyoufondue]

There's nothing wrong with my vocabulary.

[stark_naked]

Well, no...except that it's in desperate need for an update.

It's like..trying to run a program on a system that still uses Windows95 or something.

[doyoufondue]

Windows? What's-- ...Never mind. Computer thing, right?

Maybe it's a little out-dated.

[stark_naked]

...Seriously, I wonder just how it is that people ever managed to live without the advancements of technology.

[doyoufondue]

Perfectly fine and dandy.

[stark_naked]

Dandy.

See, that's exactly what I'm talking about.

[doyoufondue]

What? That's not fair. Dandy is a fine word.

[stark_naked]

Fine for the fifties, yeah.

Look, I'm not picking on you or anything. [Maybe just a little bit, but it's just too easy.] I'm just trying to help you out, that's all. To make it easier for you to fit in better.

[doyoufondue]

It died out in the fifties?

[ sigh ] Alright. You're helping then. Give me some words.