canon is moon. spoilers in comments, if you haven't seen the movie (which you should).

[profitableboron]

I...I don't follow.

You found a bunch of pictures of me and made them small, you make a mildly-scientific joke, put my name off to the side, and here I am. Here, whe-wherever here is, neither on Earth or the moon, and...what for? Where's Gerty?

[...]

N-No Gerty, huh? Fuck. I guess I could have it worse, like...well, I don't know what's worse, since everything happened and my contract "ran out," or whatever the real issue is, but...hey, I had a good run.

Let me rest, okay? It's cold, all right. It's really cold, and without Gerty to get me a hot cup of coffee, it's going to be cold for good.

So just leave me a-alone.

Comments

[just_jack]

Where else did we come but heaven, the domain of the holy of holies?

[profitableboron]

[Someone needs Gerty to cut their hair.]

...right.

[just_jack]

[Tis blasphemy, good man.]

Fret not, my child. All shall be right with the world, for the time has come for the end. My alpha and omega, as prophesied in the book of revelation!

[profitableboron]

[Who let you on base anyway?]

I ain't your kid, man.

[just_jack]

[God is everywhere, don't question it, bro.]

All the trees, the wasps, the grass, and all humankind in it's plenty and multitude are my children~

[profitableboron]

[If you're God, hell must be a bunch of shaved people.]

Who the fuck are you?

[just_jack]

[Seating himself like a patient little monk, he smiles oh-so-jovial.]

You know me. I'm the son of god, the baby in the manger.

[--oh wait, we're standing back up. Someone's a little manic today.]

Jesus Christ!

[profitableboron]

[...three years is a good time for clones to die. Real good. Sam's clearly having hallucinations right now.]

You make coffee, Mister Christ?

[just_jack]

[You wouldn't be the only one with delusions. Jack begins pacing the floor, it gives room for his ranting.]

I make many things--for example, the sunlight of the dewy morning. Everyday, just before the sunrise, I tell the sun to position itself just right so that it's beams may tickle the fancy of many a reposing sleeper, so they may desire the elixir of coffee~

...so yes, in a way, coffee is made as a result of my actions.

[I'm sorry, did you want a clear answer?]

[profitableboron]

[Jesus.

He's not making meth in that room, what the hell?]

Can you make coffee right now?

[just_jack]

[Stops in his tracks.]

No, I can not.

[profitableboron]

[Whaaaat.]

Then you can't be Jesus.

[just_jack]

Of course I am. All of creation, all of life, the light of the universe--it fills me, surrounds me! Vroom! Vroom! Over and over again, my mind races past the speed of light until it EXPLODES with love, love, love...

[profitableboron]

I feel like I'm listening to a Beatles playlist.

[emoticons]

Hello, Sam.

1/2 o. m. g.

[profitableboron]

[No...no. He was in the rover.

He was going to die, he was going to watch his other self go home, to save the new Sam.

This isn't right.]

[profitableboron]

...Gerty?

[A pause.]

Hey, bro. Got some coffee for me?

♥!

[emoticons]

[ If machines can be glad—and they can—then he is most certainly glad to see you're okay, Sam. Especially considering the state he last saw you in. ]

Of course. Your usual?

2012 is a great year already ♥ Does he still have the kick me sign? :o

[profitableboron]

[He relaxes a bit, hesitatingly putting a dirty hand out to touch the smiling e-face he's had as his only companion for the last three years. Now, briefly, he's wondering how the next Sam will treat Gerty.

And he's already realized that the only person that ever loved him, the clone that he is and will die as, is this smiling little AI that tended to his every want and desire.]

Yeah, bro. That'd be the best thing to happen to me right now.

dfglks yes! to both things! C:

[emoticons]

[ He's one algorithm away from a sadface, but Sam's fingers on his display screen (—he can't feel it, but he can see it) keeps him smiling. Even if there has been more than one Sam, he has never changed; as much as Sam needs Gerty, the opposite is also true. ]

All right, Sam. It will take five minutes.

[ For the purposes of this meta, the coffee machine in an adjacent room begins to brew; one of Gerty's arms prepares the mug. In the meantime: ]

Would you like a blanket while you wait?

I loved the wild mass guessing about these to on TV Tropes (if you have read it!)

[profitableboron]

No thanks, man, don't need a blanket.

[He'll follow him, leaning against the threshold, though not with the same presence Sam 2 displayed. Not the same level of pigmentation, still pasty and ready to talk about supposed crushes between plants and fight over a model that he can't remember making most of...but there. He's still there, and that's all that matters, right?]

...did I put that "kick me" sticky on you, or did another Sam?

[If he even knows it's there, that is.]

sob oh my god yes i have. i love them so much negl ;A; ( 1/3 )

[emoticons]

( 2/3 )

[emoticons]

( 3/3! )

[emoticons]

You did, Sam.

[ It's true. For a given definition of "true", that is. ]

Gerty is seriously the best AI bot bro ever.

[profitableboron]

Me? Huh...I don't remember that.

[He stretches an arm out to take the coffee before Gerty can get to it. As much as he listened (as best he could) to the bot when he was in the Infirmary with busted eye and worst, he could still do things on his own. And as much as there may have been other Gerty-s on other bases, taking care of other clones or even just other crews, fuck. Gerty was the only thing he had ever had in his life to count on.

He had to give him a break, for all the brief conflict they had had. He'd never seen him "cry," as it were, before he told him...]

Thanks, Gerty. So...how are you here? And where've you been? I hear about "games" and other things.

and (all) sam(s) is/are the best human bro(s) ever! dflkjdk moon y u so plural. and derp i can read

[emoticons]

You're welcome.

[ How he's been? How he got here? ] I don't know how I arrived, but I've missed you.

[ He watches Sam take the coffee, cataloguing his responses, his actions, the way he looks compared to the healthy model. There's not much he can do but answer, so that's what he does. Taking care of Sam has always been his priority—along with the lunar base, but Gerty can't run the place without him. ]

I have heard about the games too, but I've never participated. It seems certain circumstances must be met before artificial intelligences are allowed to engage.


My kingdom for an edit button!

[profitableboron]

[At the confession of missing Sam, he jerks his head a little, wondering if the new Sam was killed off, if all the clone Sams were burned or something...what if Sam 2 failed and they both were met by the "rescue team"? God, he has so many questions that he doesn't feel like ever voicing.] Me either, bro.

Yeah, but there's that other me there, right? You can run all those tests on him...us...and it'll be like I'm there, but. [But did Gerty know about the plan between him and the other Sam? He had been so tired, and so cold, and so sickly...he couldn't keep things straight. But he knew, he knew he'd seen that pod go zooming past. He'd insist that til his voice was hoarse and all his teeth fell out.] What? Like you gotta be human or something?

[original_fine]

That's no way to approach this. You have a chance--while it's true these writers, so-called, feel they can do what they want, we can try to make the best of things.

[profitableboron]

[If only Kirk knew the extent of Sam's issues with doing what people wanted...]

Yeah, we can. We. I mean, others. I guess. I'm not...well. It's c-com-complicated.

And that sounds really lame.

[original_fine]

Making the best of things?

Do you have another solution?

[profitableboron]

U-Uh, well.

...

No, not on hand.

[original_fine]

Here's the thing--I never stop looking for way out. I'm always put into pretty terrible situations--on purpose, you know--and I never stop fighting.

At the same time, I've met people I never would have known, otherwise. And I have a sort of life that is, I think, better than being forgotten.