Clutching, clinging...

[paddra_nsu_yeul]

Your interest is appreciated, but we both know this can't last. Even so, in the midst of this respite, what would you have of me? Who might I see?

[Yeul can't allow her hope to die. She clings to it with all her strength even when it is determined to desert her.]

Comments

[paradoxically]

Even if it only last for a little while, it might be worth it.

[Any time they get to spend together is worth it in his opinion.]

[paddra_nsu_yeul]

Noel! [She reaches out to brush her fingers against his cheek.] The time I spend with you is worth the sacrifice. Any sacrifice.

[paradoxically]

[The touch makes him smile softly, and he leans into it just a little.]

Hey, don't go making too many sacrifices on my account. What matters most is that you're alright.

[paddra_nsu_yeul]

[Yeul mirrors his expression, love shining in her eyes.]

I will be. You don't need to worry. [She gets so few chances to reassure him; she is taking this opportunity.] Are you safe?

[paradoxically]

[He'll worry for her anyway. No matter how much she reassures him.]

Yeah. [His smile brightens a little and he moves towards her, reaching out to cup her chin gently with his hand.] But I'm better now that you're here.

[paddra_nsu_yeul]

[She will never fully understand how she has earned such loyalty. But she also knows she would be miserable without it; without him. And she has been.]

I'm not good at protecting you. [She tries in those short moments they can be together.] I can't even take away your memories. You would be more content.

[paradoxically]

[All she ever had to do was be her for him to fall for her so completely. To want to give her everything; his loyalty included.]

Yuel. [He takes both of her hands in his, squeezes them gently.] Without my memories, without you, I would be lost. I don't want them taken away. You are worth remembering.

[paddra_nsu_yeul]

[Tears fill her eyes, but they are more happy than sad. She can't forget the lifetime she spent with Noel. He is the one who woke Yeul's heart and made her long for more than being a Seer.]

I can't forget you. No matter how many times I am reborn. [All of her incarnations have a voice, but her voice is loudest. Her hands tighten around his, her gaze determined.] I will make my way back to you.

[paradoxically]

[It pains him, right down to the core, right down to the center of his heart to see her tears. And his hands lift to cup her face ever so gently, running his thumbs beneath her eyes to wipe them away.]

I know you will. [His smile brightens, if for no other reason than to comfort her, to ease her own pain.] We'll be together again. And this time, I'll keep you safe.

[paddra_nsu_yeul]

It wasn't your fault. [Her voice catches despite her fighting to appear strong. Finally being near him becomes too much and she gives into a special longing of hers. Yeul embraces Noel, resting her cheek against his chest.]

You won't need to keep me safe. When we're together again, the fighting will be over.

[paradoxically]

[Having her so close makes his breath catch. But he opens his arms the moment she moves forward, wrapping her tightly in his embrace, softly resting his cheek upon her head.]

It doesn't matter. I should have - [What should he have done? What could he have done?] Then I'll wait for you. Even if it takes forever.

[paddra_nsu_yeul]

[He is warm and welcoming; it breaks her heart that she has caused him even a moment's pain. But the Yeuls have never agreed seamlessly on anything other than preserving the timeline. If all descends into chaos, what chance is there for life and happiness? Even if the happiness can never be hers.]

How many times have I willingly gone to my death? I cannot count them. Each time I live fourteen to seventeen years. That's all.

[She gives him a small smile.]

I want to see myself as a full adult with you, Noel.

[paradoxically]

[They were both still so young, but only one of them had time left before them. In the end, he would spend more of his life without her. It was a heartbreaking thought.]

I want that too, Yuel. [He wanted to spend his life with her. Grow old with her. But this was what came from loving a Seeress. And still he would do it all over, just to be by her side for that much longer.] Just don't give up hope, alright? I'll find some way for us to be together.

[paddra_nsu_yeul]

[That won't always be so. Yeul brushes back his hair with gentle fingers, grinning as she imagines him with grey or even white in his hair.]

It's not entirely in your hands. [The grin fades and she is once more her solemn self, green eyes fixed on his chest.] The choices are endless, but with everyone working together, we could be happy. I could live one full life.

[paradoxically]

[It's not entirely in his hands and that's frustrating and terrifying all at once. If even one thing goes wrong, if they don't put the timeline back together exactly right, then that possibility will never occur.]

No matter what, I'll keep trying for that future. For our future. [He had to believe it was possible. Had to.] Will you be alright?