It's someone's birthday!

[divineviolinist]

Happy Bloody Birthday, you bastard.

Wait, let me change that. Your mother is an admirable woman, I'd not want to taint her name.

Happy Bloody Birthday, you despicable idiot.

In case you were wondering, you're not getting a gift.

- Nicolas

Comments

[the_wolfkiller]

The fact you remembered is gift enough. Think you, Darling Nicki.

And yes, I'm sure Gabrielle is pleased you didn't run her name in the dirt.

[divineviolinist]

Go fuck yourself.

I doubt she'd be too bothered, but she's been harmed enough with your incestuous song lyrics.

[the_wolfkiller]

You would enjoy that, wouldn't you?

AS if that would stop her from ever loving me.

[divineviolinist]

I enjoy very little in relation to you.

Oh, nothing would stop her from loving you, no one is without flaw.

Not that you'd know where she is, mind.

[the_wolfkiller]

Your so cruel Nicki, why are you being mean to me on my birthday?

[divineviolinist]

Because I don't bother talking to you most other days.

[the_wolfkiller]

I am still glad to hear from you today, Nicki.

[divineviolinist]

If you say so. Are you going to stop talking to me before I can make you take those words back?

[knowsit]

I don't know, it could work in our favour if we got him the gift of beginner music lessons.

And maybe a writing class.

[divineviolinist]

Tanning studio gift card.

Too harsh?

[knowsit]

Never too harsh.

We could send him on holiday to somewhere sunny with very little shade.

[divineviolinist]

You have the nicest ideas.

By the way, I've never been one for gifts, I hope you're not expecting anything. Ever.

[knowsit]

I have no sodding clue when my birthday is so I'll let you off on that one.

But no gifts for Christmas? Or Valentines day? Tight fisted twat. Tis the season and all that, get me something.

[divineviolinist]

How about no one gets anyone something and we don't pretend it'd romantic if we did?

[knowsit]

How about stop whining and get me something decent for Christmas this year. Like a big screen TV with digital recording and surround sound. Telly is always romantic.

[divineviolinist]

That does sound like something I'd do.

Valentine's day though? Saint Valentine was beaten with clubs and beheaded, maybe we can do something around that theme.

[knowsit]

You're not beheading me or clubbing me, that's not romantic. Doing it to others? Depends.

We could go club Lestat for a few hours? Or Peaches. Or both, really make the most of the day.

[divineviolinist]

Finally you're getting in the spirit of things. Gifts should be less about making someone happy, it can be about making others miserable. Much like life.

[knowsit]

I can't argue with that kind of logic. Fine, you get away with not giving me anything I fancy on Valentines day but what about Christmas?

[divineviolinist]

I'm undecided.

But I'll crucify you for Easter, if you'd like. Crucify, spread-eagle, whichever.

[knowsit]

Fine but I better get an egg as well. And not some American rot, the proper stuff. Get me a cadbury's egg, I can drink my blood out of the shell.

Then you can crucify me.

[divineviolinist]

You want to drink your blood out of the shell of a cadbury's egg? This might actually get you a gift.

I love when you're macabre.

[knowsit]

What? You've never done it? God, it's bloody marvellous. I'll show you if you provide me an egg.

Don't get many chances to do it these days but when I do, I do it well.

[divineviolinist]

You know it likely wouldn't work for me. But I'll watch you gladly. And taste the chocolate indirectly.

The effort is appreciated.

[knowsit]

I'll drink from the egg, you drink from me. Works for booze, it'll work for chocolate.

For Christmas we could just get completely wankered on cheap booze. That seems very in spirit.

[divineviolinist]

At the very least it's worth a try. I'll taste it in your mouth at least.

Certainly. It's also what we do almost every other day, but I can play Christmas songs.

[knowsit]

That just means you'll have to keep on kissing me.

Like the old fashioned ones, the good ones or are we talking like sodding Cliff Richard or that Nancy boy McCartney.

[divineviolinist]

There are worse fates and I've made it through those too. Kissing you, I can bear.

...who do you think you're talking to?

[knowsit]

I don't know, you surprise me sometimes. You listen to music non-stop, you know more bands than me these days. And all you ever hear in December is bloody Christmas music.

[divineviolinist]

All you ever hear in December is bloody Christmas music. I don't go out unless I have to or unless I know what music I'll have to listen to.

[knowsit]

I suppose you escape most of the worst of life because you usually refuse to acknowledge what's happening around you. Lucky bugger.

[divineviolinist]

Antisocial nonconformist since day one. You wish you could be me, but at least you get to be with me.

[knowsit]

Better to shag the bloke who's everything you want than try to be everything you want. More fun that way.

[divineviolinist]

Works out better than I'd have ever thought.

[atwisteddoll]

You only encourage him.

[divineviolinist]

It really doesn't make a difference either way, chérie, there is nothing that doesn't encourage Lestat.

[atwisteddoll]

True, but if you gave him less attention it would be a start.

[divineviolinist]

A start of what? It wouldn't make the world stop paying attention. At the very least I can aggravate him. There is some satisfaction in causing him anguish, however short-lived.

[camefromearth]

Well now that's not right, every birthday should have at least one gift.

But I get the feeling that they wouldn't want any of yours.

[divineviolinist]

Oh, he'd want the world. He has a way of getting it too, so I don't need to feel too bad.

I also don't feel too bad because I hate him, that helps with the guilt.

[camefromearth]

Doesn't everybody? Not that the world really belongs to anyone in the first place.

But if you dislike them so terribly, then why stay around him?

[divineviolinist]

I don't. I just like to remind him of myself enough for him to hurt over it every now and then.

It's therapeutic.

[camefromearth]

For you, or him?

[divineviolinist]

Me, obviously. Although it might do him some good to be reminded of just why he is hated too, I honestly couldn't care less.

[camefromearth]

It sounds as though both of you have a difficult time of letting go of the other.

[divineviolinist]

That one is mostly on me. He won't ever suffer for long, not as long as there are shiny things in the world.

[camefromearth]

But he'll keep suffering as long as you continue to bother him. And if you continue to bother him, then you'll continue he to harm yourself. Best to leave him with his shiny things.

[divineviolinist]

Oh, I continue to harm myself no matter what, that's really quite unrelated to anything other than my inherent nature. Some things just add fuel. But worry not, I'm leaving him to his ever so overly dramatic ways. Today just felt like a day.