Unamused Dragonborn is Unamused

[drehnifusbahi]

Well, at least you waited to pull this until after Alduin had been dealt with.

And I suppose I should be thankful that you didn't go with "nerdvahkiin" for a username after all. Though I'm still not entirely sure about this one...

Comments

[godofschemes]

You've done well, stopping Akatosh's spawn from taking away that which is rightfully mine.

[destruir]

[YOU AGAIN. Alduin is still so furious with you for perverting dragonkind with your foulness that he can't help but thread-jack jump in here and... threaten and growl at him some more.] Silence your tongue, bein ulfah, or I will remove it for you.

[drehnifusbahi]

[... Right. He's just going to back slowly away and leave the two of you to it. And maybe later he'll get to reflect on the oddity of being thankful for Alduin's intervention.]

[destruir]

[Sorry-- after who was dealt with, now?]

Dealt with, am I? Dii dinok los ni reistig, Dovahkiin. You cannot destroy me.

[drehnifusbahi]

[He's been through this song and dance so many times now that he's more irritated than frightened at the sight of Alduin.]

That might be more intimidating if I hadn't heard it twice before. [Still, one hand curls around the hilt of Dragonbane, ready to draw the moment Alduin moves, a frost spell beginning to form in his other hand.]

[destruir]

[Who can blame him? Alduin has a penchant for being a broken record.]

Such arrogance for one who could not manage to absorb my rii. My soul. [But the World Eater can afford him some begrudging respect for being so resilient and never failing to stand up to him when others will not. Unfortunately, that just makes him want to destroy the Dovahkiin even more. He refrains of monologuing this time, at least, and snaps open his jaws to cry:] Yol!

[Fire. Fire everywhere to counter that frost he spied tingling at the Dovahkiin's fingertips.]

[drehnifusbahi]

[He dives to one side with a curse, exchanging the frost spell for a Steadfast Ward, which just manages to hold until the flames die down. It's not enough to stop him from taking some damage, but it at least keeps him from being roasted where he stands.

He shakes it off as best he can, and shouts right back once he can see to aim again:] Joor Zah Frul!

[shoutingmatch]

I'll trade you.

[Fellow Dragonborn unamused by her own username.]

[drehnifusbahi]

[Ooh, that is unfortunate. He suddenly finds himself profoundly grateful that "nerdvahkiin" was the worst his mundane could think of.]

Changing it at this point would require her to spend money. [Which, judging by his tone, is about as likely as General Tullius and Ulfric Stormcloak becoming drinking buddies.]

[shoutingmatch]

Perish the thought.

[She definitely knows the feeling.]

Frankly, this whole name thing is insulting. Just who do they think they are?

[drehnifusbahi]

People who are as far removed from us as the Divines themselves, and about as vulnerable to attack?

[It's offered up wryly, with only a touch of bitterness. He's well aware he could have had far worse, as far as names and as far as where he's to be sent.]

[milkdrinker]

This one thinks you should do well to be thankful for such a name, for you could have easily suffered far worse. [ after a pause and a sigh, ears flicking back, ] Too easily.

[ what kind of khajiit doesn't appreciate a good pun???? this one, apparently. woe. ]

[drehnifusbahi]

[Milk drinker? And he's a khajiit? That's rough.]

I am definitely thankful she didn't decide on "nerdvahkiin." Or "magpieborn."

[worldeater]

[This is a sneer. A sneer from a decidedly very human man, though there may be something eerily familiar about it.

Of course, he need only open his mouth and the mystery practically solves itself.]

Mey, that you should dare complain about something so insignificant as names.

[When there are far more terrible fates to be subjected to. Like being stuck in a human body, for one.

Did he just come here to complain and glare at you? Maybe silently trying to figure out if he can strangle you somehow with these weak human hands? Yeah, probably.]

[drehnifusbahi]

[Yes, the voice gives it away. His brows go up, but he knows better than to let his amusement show.]

Think what you like. [He's never particularly cared what his enemies think of him, after all.]

[And if Alduin does work up the nerve to attack, he'll find it more difficult than expected to throttle the Dragonborn.]

[worldeater]

[Likely so. But Alduin has had the misfortune of being in this particular situation a tad longer than he would like; as a result, he may or may not have learned not to attack things blindly out of anger when in a rather squishy human form.

...probably. The Dovahkiin is always an exception to the rule, when it concerns irritating matters.]

I do. As will I speak as I please.

[Example:] Truly, I hope that you have found yourself at the mercy of a "mundane" who will be more than willing to humiliate you in very imaginative ways. Niid aaz.

[drehnifusbahi]

[He looks less than impressed with Alduin's words. And not particularly intimidated, with the World- Eater brought down to his own level.]

Whereas I have no need to hope, given what yours has already subjected you to.

[worldeater]

[There's that sneer again, that twist of the lip that almost seems more serpentine than human. Smarmy Dovahkiin.]

From dovah to man; my fate only reveals the potential for yours. If we are to follow the trend, you may spend the rest of your days as a-- [oh what's the word?] --skeever. It is not too far removed from your current self.

[drehnifusbahi]

[Of course he is, he's an Imperial. If you were hoping for insults that would quickly give way to wordless battlecries, you should have picked a Nord.]

Except, of course, that such a thing would hold no entertainment for my mundane. And if it does not entertain them, then they see no point. [He flashes a bright, patently false smile.] Still, far be it from me to keep a man from dreaming.

[As for the insult... it rolls right off his back. Really, he's been called far worse than 'skeever' by far better men than Alduin.]

[worldeater]

[But you should be proud that he hasn't resorted to threats of tearing off your head just yet. Look at this restraint!]

Fun zey, tell me what passes for entertainment for your mundane.

[Something terrible hopefully.]

[drehnifusbahi]

[Well, at least Alduin is broadening his horizons. The last few times, it was all very repetitive. "I am immortal" this and "You are a pitiful powerless joor" that.]

Knowing her? She'll want to change me into a woman or regress me to a child. Or possibly induce me to rut with anything that moves. [As if he doesn't do that already. And he doesn't seem terribly concerned by the other possibilities, either.]

[worldeater]

[Oh, all of that is constantly churning in the back of his mind, don't you worry. It's nearly a prerequisite; but at this point, even Alduin tires of repeating the same thing to every mortal he comes across. Even all of these Dovahkiin. And since he's found himself pitifully at the mercy of his mundane, such happens more often than not.

He makes something of a "tch" sound with his teeth. He certainly has no comment to his latter statement.]

And yet I do not hear apprehension in your voice, Dovahkiin. You do not fear the change?

[drehnifusbahi]

[If he does fear the prospect at all, he does a very good job hiding it.]

What would be the point? She may decide tomorrow to simply send me back to my adventures; even if she does not, she may never grow bored enough to try any of those things. [That, and he feels relatively certain she won't do anything too nasty while there's still that business of the cultists on Solstheim to take care of.]

[worldeater]

[And now Alduin scoffs.]

Meyus joor. [Well that didn't take long, did it?] I find it difficult to believe that you are so apathetic to not care about becoming someone's toy. A plaything.

[Because he hates it, if you haven't figured it out by now.]

[drehnifusbahi]

[And there it is; he was almost waiting for it. He'd have started to doubt this was truly Alduin if the phrase "foolish mortal" didn't get tossed around eventually.]

I see no point in worrying about things I cannot change. [Or in rising to Alduin's bait, apparently.] If it happens, I'll adapt. If it doesn't, I'll count myself fortunate.

[worldeater]

["Foolish mortal" will forever and always be an old favorite.]

If only you had been so complacent in Tamriel.

[drehnifusbahi]

[He blinks and cocks his head as if genuinely confused.]

Ah, but the presence of dragons on Tamriel is something I could change, and have, without undue difficulty. [And by "the presence of dragons" he of course means Alduin's presence.]

[worldeater]

Without undue difficulty? [He just had to go there. Alduin's temper flares by a measurable amount, if his expression and tone means anything.]

Do not dare insult me, mortal, speaking as if the task was of little consequence to you. In the end, all you did was delay what is inevitable, and you cannot say that you were not afraid of what may come if you failed.

[drehnifusbahi]

[Well of course he was afraid, he's not a fool. And he's wary still, despite them being on more even footing this time around.]

Perhaps you're right, and there will come a day when the Divines permit your return to Tamriel. I doubt that day will come during my lifetime, but if it does... [His hand drifts to the hilt of Dragonbane. That he still carries it, despite the Dragon Crisis ostensibily being over, speaks volumes.

[If Alduin does return within his lifetime, if there is another Dragon Crisis... he'll be ready.]

[worldeater]

I know I am right. [Of this, he is certain.] I will return, and if you still live, Dovahkiin--

[He eyes Dragonbane, not looking particularly threatened, despite his deep frown, and despite in his current form, being rather unarmed himself. ]

--I shall make it my priority to ensure your swift death. Zu'u vaat nii.

[drehnifusbahi]

[No matter. Dragonbane and Dragonrend are far from the only tricks he has up his metaphorical sleeve.]

You may try.

[If nothing else, Alduin will find a world much better equipped to face the dragon threat. A united Skyrim and a new order of Blades, for a start.]

[dovahkitty]

[Have yet another dragonborn, folding his arms, tail lashing in annoyance. They need to start some sort of guild, clearly.]

I think our mundanes are incapable of names that aren't awful.

[drehnifusbahi]

[By the Nines, and he thought "milk drinker" for a khajiit was bad.]

I'm beginning to suspect you're right.

[dovahkitty]

[Player logic is strange. Racial slurs are hideous things if they're one of Earth's but Nirn's are apparently hilarious. He's been trying not to think of it too much because it's not as if he runs around Skyrim calling himself "Dovahkitty" and that's where it actually counts.

But now that it's actually been brought up, well...]

Everything's a game to them. [That was not a meta joke. Not intentionally, anyway.] Well, it really is, what they do with these journals, but that doesn't make it right.

[drehnifusbahi]

[And this is where he realizes exactly how much worse it could've been - but luckily, she didn't think of calling him a milk-drinker or a "damned Imperial fop" until it was too late. The worst she'd come up with before settling on this was "magpieborn." Which would suit a thief far better than a mage, Mundane--]

No, it does not. [Even if his doesn't have anything especially harmful or humiliating planned for the foreseeable future, he can agree with that on general principal.] Although, most of the games -at least, those my mundane has looked at- don't appear to accept characters like us. [He makes an all-encompassing gesture at all the Dragonborns in their general vicinity to clarify what he means.] That at least puts some sort of limiit on the things they can do.