wow caesar tell us how you really feel

[thesignofthebull]

This is your idea of a joke, right? Where do you get off, thinking you can control me like I'm another one of your little puppets? Get it through your thick skull: nobody commands me but me. One cockamamie thing passes your lips and I'll rip your tongue out and feed it to the dogs.

Face it. You fucked up, big time.

Do something about all this noise, while you're at it.

Now get out of my sight. Vale.

Comments

[legateship]

[one (1) legate not offering to help. this one's not his job. at least, unless you make it.]

How's that working for you?

[thesignofthebull]

[Holy fuck it's a ghost.]

You're fucking with me, aren't you?

[Last he saw you... weren't you kind of... on fire....]

[legateship]

[Boo.]

Last I checked that was a terrible idea.

[So, no.]

[thesignofthebull]

When's the last time you checked?

[Just. Gotta make sure this isn't some. Bizarre dream sequence or some shit.]

[legateship]

[Well. Caesar's obviously concerned about something. Caesar's obviously a few years older than he is by Joshua's count. Not sure what's up, yet, so have a suspicious look and an imaginary date.]

October 2258. [Someone got killed just the other day for asking stupid questions, but he can't remember which day that was exactly. He figures this'll do.]

Is there something I should know about?

[thesignofthebull]

[It was a day that ends in Y, knowing our bro Caesar. But that's-- alright, that's not great, but it's nice to know he's not... hallucinating. Or meeting a ghost. Or. Whatever nonsense.]

Nah. You'll probably figure it out on your own, anyway. [Well. In more ways than one.]

[legateship]

[That doesn't actually put him at ease, but he doesn't think it's supposed to. So he just lets it go.]

Fine. [Well, as "just" as his letting go gets.]

So, is she actually listening to you?

[thesignofthebull]

She's trying, I'll give her that. Not sure how much good it'll do, or if that effort's gonna be enough. But we'll see soon enough.

[legateship]

Any plans for this place yet?

[thesignofthebull]

I'm not even sure this place is worth it.

[legateship]

Not from what I've seen of it.

[But he isn't the brains of the operation here, and he knows that.]

[thesignofthebull]

Finally, we agree. [And if he sounds a little... bitter about that, chalk it up to old age. Well. Older, anyway.]

[legateship]

[Yeah sorry, he still wants to know what's going on.]

Has that become less common?

[thesignofthebull]

What do you think?

[A little exasperated. C'mon, bro. Catch a clue.]

[legateship]

[and he does catch a clue. the only thing that comes to mind in response is expletives though. uhm. give him a moment because it just doesn't compute that things could go that wrong. in the meantime, he shakes his head, incredulous.]

No way. No fucking way.

[thesignofthebull]

My sentiments exactly. [It's still so infuriating that he can't even directly talk about it.]

[legateship]

Shit.

[... still got nothing. there's that urge to insist he wouldn't, he would never but apparently he will, and if anything's worse than failure and betrayal, it's lying about it. and he can't fix this. rattles him more than anything he can remember. (a very quiet part of him suggests that maybe it's for the better. he ignores that, like he's ignored that part of him for years.)]

How long do I have?

[thesignofthebull]

Don't fuck it up this time and maybe you'll live longer. [Although the Dam was more of an... excuse than anything. There's no reason he needs to know that, though, does he? Sometimes you repeat a myth so often...

Well. He's not wrong.]

[legateship]

[it's not like he's got any real idea of what's going to happen. he'd believe all sorts of things.]

Of course. [the only thing to do.]

[justnumbers]

[Oh look, it's one of the Courier's most hated enemies! ...Goody.]

...You're not in charge here.

[thesignofthebull]

[Oh look you're... that package delivery person. Hooray?]

Not yet. In time, who knows. Don't see much reason to try and conquer this place, either. It's full of nothing but aimless wanderers with nowhere better to go, so they're stuck conglomerating here. What a useless bunch!

[justnumbers]

[That package delivery person who does not appreciate being stalked by frumentarii all over the Mojave.]

That's a rude thing to call us, Caesar. But then, you've never been big on manners. Nipton was proof enough of that.

[thesignofthebull]

[...Is she serious? She-- okay, Caesar, let's try not to laugh too much here.]

What was I thinking? Next time I strategically butcher a town, I'll make sure to knock on the door first. That should solve that little politeness problem for you.

[justnumbers]

[Curse you, Good Karma! Therese merely makes a sour face at Caesar.]

How about you leave the Mojave alone, and maybe you'll get to live a long life. -Well, longer, anyway.

[thesignofthebull]

[Neutral Karma is cruise control for cool!]

Why don't you tell the NCR to retreat and save yourself some time? Way more fucking likely, too.

[justnumbers]

[The devs must've been smoking that day. Neutral Karma...]

The NCR... doesn't take orders from me. And I don't want them running things any more than I want it to be you or Mr. House.

[thesignofthebull]

[#Bethesda.]

What you want is immaterial, and it's not gonna change what will be happening. Follow along with me or get out of my way, or you'll be getting sent to another grave.

[justnumbers]

[Okay, now it's her laughing at Caesar.]

Benny shot me twice and it didn't take. Trust me, Caesar, I'm hard to kill. Joshua has nothing on me.

[thesignofthebull]

Say that name again and you'll be in so many pieces they won't be able to find a coffin. [And, hopefully before she gets the bright idea to say JOSHUA JOSHUA JOSHUA like beetlejuice, he'll change the subject. Or try to.] Now. I also doubt that New Vegas slime is a measure of quality in your assassins, and more of a blemish.

[justnumbers]

J- [Wait, no, not without power armor and/or Boone in tow.] I dunno. I barely had more than a pistol on me. Most people don't survive two to the head.

[thesignofthebull]

Then your would be assassin fucked it all up, didn't he?

[justnumbers]

Sure. Let's go with that. [Benny's out of the picture anyway, so it doesn't matter.]

Seems to be a running theme, though, doesn't it?

[thesignofthebull]

You're a regular comedian with that act. Drop it. [so pissed joshua ain't dead. cannot talk about joshua not being dead. this is why you don't set people on fire and throw them off canyons, kids.]

[justnumbers]

[This is why you blow off heads with shotguns, kids. Chunky Salsa Rule holds even in the Mojave.]

What? [Beat.] Oh! No, no, I wasn't- I meant other people. Not...

[thesignofthebull]

That's what I thought. [~we may see murder yet~]

[justnumbers]

[Ain't no rule about glaring, so here comes a glare. Glare glare glare.]

...hmph.

[thumbsdown]

Better be some kinda joke.

[He's not sure there could be a worse person to show up uninvited. Especially when he can't just solve the problem with his rifle.]

[thesignofthebull]

The feeling's mutual. Unbelievable though it may seem.

[Ugh, NCR. can't you just. not suck?]

[thumbsdown]

Yeah, well. Guess I'll just have to hope you don't stick around for too long.

[He's not completely free of the Legion here, but at least he didn't have to deal with the likes of Caesar.]

[thesignofthebull]

Take it up with this scriba, because all of this, you can blame on them.

[bloomstwice]

Talking to your mun with such vulgar language is disrespectful!

Why do you act so crude when they seem to like you so much?