dear_mun | muse needs a hug (and denies this adamantly)

I'm fine. I'm fine.

I wish you would stop worrying about me, honestly. I'm really going to be all right. I'm working, and I'm helping the team, and I'm around, and hell, I got to hold something that Peggy Carter held and I'm still excited about that, and things are getting back to normal.

[Jaw tightening.]

Not everything. I know that. But it's -- there are some things only time can take care of, aren't there? We both know that while I'm not entirely shy about feeling, I'm not the greatest at unloading my feelings without, well, feeling terribly guilty about it, and sure, maybe that's a part of it, maybe I do feel guilty about what I'm feeling and why I'm feeling it and the other things that I can't really talk about, and maybe it wouldn't hurt if I could talk to someone about everything, maybe I wouldn't mind just curling up with a blanket and a cup of tea or, or my head in someone's lap, someone I could get advice from about other someones and somethings, because of all of the ways and things that I might possibly feel, but --

I've gotten by in the past without elaborate hurt/comfort scenarios playing out, or without talking about it, and eventually things feel right again. I get by. I'm fine.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Okay, Jemma, Simon's just going to stare for a second, because from his perspective, you're awfully young.]

Everything all right, Mum---ma'am? Ma'am?

Edited 2014-11-23 02:50 (UTC)

[She blinks, shakes her head very abruptly.]

Yes. The unfortunate thing about rather having to let someone in on what goes through my mind, as I'm sure you know from being in this place, is that she's rather prone to worrying about me, but I'm all right.

[Okay, important note. Do not break the space time continuum. That probably gets Fury to yell at you.]

Well, that's good. I don't know so much that my mun worries about me... He seems to take great delight in putting me in situations that make me nervous.

[Until then, this is just a standard interaction, and Jemma knows how to handle those.]</small. I've noticed that's sort of the trend, yes. My mun says I get enough horrible things elsewhere, she doesn't need to add to it.

Of course, most things, most people, make me sort of nervous, really. I get on much better with machines than people.

[She offers a small smile, then.]

That's all right. Not everyone's much for people. I don't mind them, but sometimes I'd rather just be alone with work. Easier to concentrate that way.

[He smiles a little. Just like she always says.]

I generally don't get out into the field unless I'm doing on the scene investigation after something's gone down... Though Agent Coulson, she's always trying to drag me out of the lab to do more field stuff.

[A tilt of her head.]

You know... but "she's"?

[She's heard about this, alternate dimensions where everyone is opposite themselves one way or another.]

[Ooops.]

Oh, sorry... The, ah, the Coulson, er, one of them anyway, is the daughter of the Coulson you'd be working with.

[Long pause. Oh, so it's one of those things.

She doesn't really know how to handle those things, but she's trying.]

I didn't know Coulson had a daughter.

[See, placing timelines! Seems relevant.]

Well... He probably doesn't in your timeline. Yet. My timeline's somewhat... different. A lot of what happened in most timelines happened, but it happened something like twenty years ago.

Oh! That's... oh.

[A sheepish smile.]

I shouldn't ask you how things turn out, then, or risk breaking something.

[He pulls a sheepish grin of his own.]

Probably for the best. Pretty sure causing temporal disturbances are against regulations.

I can manage a cuppa.

[He's pretty sure that's the only part in all this that she'd want his help with.]

How do you take it?

[After a long and very wary pause.]

Teaspoon of sugar, nonfat milk. It's really not necessary, though.

[He answers on a lopsided dismissive shrug, already moving to make it happen.]

It's no trouble.

[He can't say he's surprised that "happens to be British" fell a bit flat.]

Think they've noticed how posh you are? [Or does it go over their heads?]

[She won't say, but it's oddly appreciated. Because while her mun may think she needs the aforementioned talking-it-out and such, she does not expect it, not a bit. Especially not from someone who's still half a stranger.]

Can't say I've spent much time wondering, really. [Sheepishly smiling all of a sudden.] But noticing unimportant, minute details seems to be a lost skill a lot of the time.

[It's the little inconsequential moments like this that should make him less of a stranger, in time. That's if he doesn't fuck things up completely, as he's wont to do.

He could argue that it's unimportant and minute to her because she's posh, in the way that money's not important to people who already have a lot of it. But he chooses to interpret it, more broadly, as something unimportant in the scheme of the work they're doing and the agency and fighting HYDRA, whatever.]

Lost like Latin. Except you probably speak Latin. A lot of medical stuff is in Latin, isn't it?

Anyway, luckily for us, we know an exception to the rule. Someone who notices just about everything, and puts all those pieces together into something that makes sense.

[She could hope, anyway. She misses the team feeling, is the thing. She misses that easy camaraderie.

And maybe that's so; she's never been vain about such things, which of itself is a kinf of vanity most likely. But it's his interpretation that she means right now, more or less.]

I mean, I don't speak it, nobody speaks Latin really, but I understand a lot of it. Because if the medical stuff, yes.

[Then a pause. She's back to wariness just a bit.]

We do.

[Sometimes there's a cost to doing business that you don't know it until it's paid. It wouldn't be very fair if Simmons felt as though... As though she can't come home again. But Hunter didn't see how things were before, so he can't know how things are supposed to be, what normal looks like.]

That's what I figured. I'll call you if I need help with any mottos or, uh, proverbs. [Audentes fortuna juvat, he'd probably recognize that written down. Not as useful as a medical term, but motivational nonetheless.]

You're fine. You'll be fine. I know. [He confirms her assertion, pretty abruptly.] Sometimes, though, we get more than we need.

[So being fine or "fine" shouldn't preclude a hurt/comfort scenario. Hunter doesn't want tea but he's got two mugs out, gesture of solidarity, just so she won't feel alone. And oh, look, it's the grumpy cat mug.]

[It's not even the business, except for that it is, and maybe the business was an excuse to avoid other things and maybe avoiding other things is what suggested the business and maybe she's just making things harder than they have to be, because there's an easy solution, but it wouldn't be a solution really and especially not after everything and...

Really, she feels like more of this is her official fault than probably is.

She's watching him make the tea and damned if that abruptness doesn't cause a little faltering.]

Maybe more than we even realized was a possibility.

[She tries to smile, like she's just being hypothetical.]

muse needs a hug (and denies this adamantly)

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