Spoilers for Assault on Arkham!

[earbite]

Munny, you're not still mad at me, are ya?

[...]

C'mon, what was I supposed to do?! I'm a gal in love! He might smack me around sometimes, but he's a real nice guy deep down! You just don't know him like I do.

[...Harley. No.]

Ah geez, you're not gonna get over this one. Y'know, it's not very healthy to cling to stuff like that. You should do some yoga, or somethin', to get all that bad energy out.

Comments

[neverendingbattle]

...Young lady, it sounds as if you're the one clinging to something unhealthy.

[Listen to the hundred year old Superman, Harley.]

[earbite]

Whatcha talkin' about, pal? I'm healthy as a horse!

[And let this manic laughter convince you of that.]

[neverendingbattle]

[Good job, he's utterly convin- no. No, he's not.]

Is that so...? How about applying some horse sense and realising being smacked around is bad for that health.

[sickjoke]

No.

No no no no no no.

No. No.

[ Don't mind Red Hood here he's always upset at the idea of anyone with his Earth Prime (or any variation thereof) double. ]

[earbite]

Yes!

[Pause. Wait.]

What're we arguin' about, again?

[sickjoke]

Nothing. We're arguing about nothing.

I'm just bemoaning the fact that he manages to find lovers and I fight crime and am in a long-term relationship with justice.

[hardluckcat]

I will never understand the appeal.

[earbite]

That's 'cause you got no taste.

[hardluckcat]

Cheshire may have been a piece of work, but at least she didn't try to kill me until circumstances forced the issue.

One day he's going to kill you. You do understand this, right?

[notadamnfurball]

[Messages will all be typed on a tablet, as she is currently a strange creature strongly resembling a black leopard.]

Sometimes love knows no boundaries.

My mundane thinks you're adorable, by the way.

[earbite]

[Kitty! Harley loves kitties-- wait this really isn't the time.]

That's right! Nice that someone 'round here gets it.

Haha, aw shucks! I bet your mun's a real cutie, too!

[notadamnfurball]

She has her moments.

And she loves that you call him "Puddin'". I would never get away with such terms of endearment with Jonathan.

[walkingmeltdown]

Sounds as if you have a very interesting standard for what you consider "healthy". [All the irony in his tone, here.]

[earbite]

Interestin' is my middle name! [Yeeah, she doesn't pick up on it.]

[walkingmeltdown]

Somehow, I had a feeling.

But it's not much of a surprise. Think they tend to hand that out with the citizenship papers, in Gotham.

All the not!Jokers are coming in apparently

[jokester_not_joker]

Oh come on Harley I know you're smarter than this.

It sounds like a pretty typical abusive relationship to me. You deserve better for yourself.

You deserve to be among people who care about you. Really care about you.

Will Harley ever find her Puddin'? (god I hope not)

[earbite]

Puddin'! The real, honest-to-goodness Puddin'!

[Not listening to a word you say here, not!Pudding. Harley's desperate enough for approval at this point she's about to make that friendly cat her new Mr. J.]

You got a real great sense a'humour, Mr. J! It's so... charming.

[Just casually gonna curl up at his side, sighing contentedly. She missed him so much.]

'N don't worry, I'm not gonna listen to all those people up there. I know you care about me more than anyone else in the whole wide world.

Not to mention this particular Joker has feelings about the Harley of his universe

[jokester_not_joker]

Oh dear you're not listening.

[He's getting prepared for a poor reaction on her part.]

I'm not The Joker. The name's Jackie or Jokester if you like. I'm from a different universe.

[It was really tempting just to lie, but he wasn't going to do that to her.]

In my universe I was a big-name comedian once upon a time and you Harley, you were my talent agent. You were good at your job too. Problem was I made my living making fun of a big brute in an Owl suit and as much as you think Batsie can't take a joke this guy is worse.

Long story short I ended up with minus one Harley and plus two big scars on my face.

[He hoped that the explanation would at least earn her being civil although he doubted she would listen to him about Joker.]

combo breaker!

[freefell]

Harley-girl, you wouldn't happen to be talking about little old me, would you?

[earbite]

'Course I am, Puddin'! You know you're my dream guy.

[Even if she did sleep with Deadshot. More than once.]

[darknessiknow]

Mayhaps you should consider taking that advice for yourself.

[Don't worry, just because the voice sounds like it's coming from within your ears, and you can't see him, doesn't mean he isn't there.]

[earbite]

Waah!!

[Harley covers her ears and shakes her head. Sorry, pal, but this is weird even for her.]

I ain't crazy! You get outta my head, ya jerk!

[darknessiknow]

[Oh Harley baby you so funny and adorable. So much so that he is letting out a deep, dark laugh that would make the Devil piss himself in fear.]

Hahaha~..... Oh I already knew what evil lurked within your craven heart long before I entered your mind, fool woman. Hehe....

Yet I am not here to carry out your punishment. But to grant you advise.

[columblind]

Bullshit. If someone loves you, they should never hurt you.

[yes, let the psychopathic dead boy talk about healthy relationships]

[earbite]

Ain't you the guy in the gimp suit?

[Mun may be canonblind, but she knows about the suit. And now Harley does, too.]