Ancient fandom/Muse is displeased with trailers for new movie

[hothead_turtle]

What the shell?! Why are we eight feet tall giants? What's with the cheesy lines? Why does Don look like Urkel? Why is Leo wearing thin bamboo armor? What's with the loincloth? Could they have miscast April any worse?

Eric Sachs?!

This is gonna be the dumbest movie ever. Even Mikey could direct something better.

Comments

[purpleninja]

It's horrible, isn't it? My mun thinks we look like Shrek and The Incredible Hulk had babies.

Even worse, it's coming out on her birthday.

[hothead_turtle]

I ain't surprised we're gettin' the whole 'brain-dead popcorn flick' treatment, but shell, there are standards.

My mun's been a fan since the old 80's cartoon. He enjoys most incarnations of us, but says this is pretty much like a slap in the face. More like a sucker punch if you ask me.

[purpleninja]

I think Godzilla looks better in his new movie.

What a shame, they could have done so much with us, what with all the new technology. Honestly, we don't even look like teenagers.

[hothead_turtle]

Yeah, looks like they know how ta respect the source material. My mun thinks it's a pretty solid movie at least. Fits in with the tone of a lotta the others.

You're tellin' me. I'm surprised they didn't give me stubble to go with the 'roided up body.

[purpleninja]

I'm surprised about the missing stubble, too. Or maybe a cigar.

I don't even recognize myself.

[gunnerbrat]

Has your mun seen the anime version?

[hothead_turtle]

Nah, but he knows of it. Transformations an' giant robots, right?

[gunnerbrat]

Aye.

The mun says something about combining mechs! She doesn't think any depiction can be as ridiculous.

[hothead_turtle]

Sounds like your generic Japanese cartoon ta me. Then again, I'm not the expert on those.

[thenextlife]

My mun's deeply disturbed by the... turtle lips. I have to say, so am I. And I've met my share of talking anthropomorphic animals.

[hothead_turtle]

Yeah well you guys ain't the only ones.

[losingdeadweight]

Could be worse.

Though, with the human they say's involved with this, don't think you can get worse either.

[hothead_turtle]

[Woah. Did Stockman do some kind of experiment mixing turtle and triceraton DNA or something? Is that's what's going on?]

Uh, yeah. No kiddin'.

[losingdeadweight]

[SOMETHING LIKE THAT. Cept not at all.]

Though I have to say, I appreciate any Raph I see.

[hothead_turtle]

Feelin's mutual, I'm sure.

[goddamnbatsman]

Ya know, I didn't think it was possible, but they somehow managed to make ya look even uglier.

[hothead_turtle]

Didn't realize you've been takin' comedy lessons from Mikey.

[toadytolansky]

[All the hero worship from a small and smelly kid.]

Wow, you guys are cool. You got your own movie too, huh?

Mun over here says they're afraid to even look at your movie, yo.

[hothead_turtle]

[Don't worry, Raph's smelled worse. He lives in the sewer after all. That and he seems to get covered in garbage a lot, for some reason.]

It's our fifth movie, actually. This one's supposed ta be one of them reboots, though.

An' I don't blame 'em. Neither does my mun.

[toadytolansky]

S'cool there's mutant movie stars where you're from. [He hops closer.]

So you just hang around here? My mun keeps threatening to send me to summer camp, but it aint' happened so far. Wish it would- free food, bugs, a lake...

[hothead_turtle]

Bugs...

[insertmoviereferencehere]

Really Raphie? I never knew you thought so highly of me.

[hothead_turtle]

Aw crap.

[insertmoviereferencehere]

I feel so warm and tingly inside now. Thank you Raphie.

[hothead_turtle]

Keep it up, Mikey, and the only thing you'll be feelin' is pain.