how could I possibly resist lbr here

[sneakyshoes]

[ <sub>he's very obviously all worked up, body tense, like a vicious jungle cat ready to pounce on the first sorry person to get caught close enough. he keeps walking in tense, straight lines and then hissing out breath between clenched teeth in a gruesome, evil little smile. eventually he'll talk, just. just give him a sec.

when he does, his voice is low and hoarse, his eyes flashing.</sub> ]

Come on then, come here. Every single one of you. Come come come come to Daddy. It's storytime, dearies, but I'm not the one telling it this time. No no no, I want your theories. Go on, then. From realistic to outlandish, I want them all. [ _{oh god and now he's grabbing the nearest thing to him. for the sake of narration, this is a camera, and the screen you're watching is now filled with his face. those psychotic eyes especially. a hissing whisper, because otherwise he'd shout:} ] How'd I do it? How did I come back from the dead?

[ _{daddy's h u n g r y. his pupiles are blown out wide, even if his eyes are almost slits, and he's practically spitting the words out now, much less man and much more animal.} ]

Give me your best shot.

Oh oh oh, [ _{leaning away from the camera now, tapping his forehead. it's as if he wasn't just rabid a half second ago.} ] that's right, that's riiiight, _{however could I forget} aaaaand speaking of- ohh~hh Mary? I'd love to give you my card. Bang-up shooting skills, dearest. Something I could definitely put to a job, even if your fashion sense is deplorable.

Comments

[you_dont_work_alone]

The answer is you didn't come back from the dead. You're still dead. Get used to it because that isn't changing.

And don't you speak to Mary! Even if you were alive, she'd want nothing to do with you.

[sneakyshoes]

[ _singsong: ] Shee~e's alreaa~ady taaa~alking to mee~ee.

[ _{yep. that's it. that's the whole response.} ]

[you_dont_work_alone]

What?

[He rushes right over!]

i legit screamed at the end of the episode no lie

[abeltorun]

[Runner 5 takes a step back and hunches his shoulders up protectively. Hoo boy, the crazy's practically palpable off of Moriarty.]

Face double? Pre-recorded messages? How the hell should I know, mate?

Here, just- just take it easy. Okay?

I wasn't even going to watch it AND THEN I HEARD ABOUT THE MIND PALACE GOOD *LORD*

[sneakyshoes]

[ _{hissssssss. he stops moving suddenly, freezes and oscillates his head like a snake, eyes fixed on Runner 5.} ]

I'm sorry. That wasn't what I wanted to hear.

I only watched it because TWO YEARS WAIT GOOD GRIEF

[abeltorun]

[That... is not good. 5 straightens his shoulders, his voice low and soothing. (Or trying to be soothing; he's a little unnerved.)]

Okay. Okay. Not a face double. A faked suicide, then. One last big trick, hey?

[goodforhim]

[She's going to laugh but it's clear she's not amused]

And I'm supposed to take that as a compliment, am I? Keep dreaming, Moriarty. I'm not interested in having anything to do with you.

[sneakyshoes]

Oh, please. Don't get all high and mighty now, dearest. That syrupy-sweet, dessssperately in love thing doesn't suit you at all.

[goodforhim]

[Her eyes grow a little colder at that]

No? It's a good thing I don't really care what you think then isn't it? And don't pretend like you know anything about me.

[you_dont_work_alone]

Mary! Don't talk to him!

[sneakyshoes]

[ _{GA A A A A A A A ASP.} ]

What's this? Are we jealous, Johnnyboy?

[goodforhim]

John.

[She'll just take his hand and try and calm him down a little]

It's okay. He doesn't scare me.

[thewomanwhocounts]

It's a sick copycat and nothing more. Though why anyone would want to copy you, of all people, is beyond me.

[sneakyshoes]

[ _{heavy duty eyerolls.} ]

Bo~oring. There isn't a man alive who can pretend to be me, kitten. Besides, what timing.

[thewomanwhocounts]

If you think that, you should pay a visit to the psychiatric ward sometime, assuming you haven't already. As for the timing, it could well have been a protege.

pfft haha I DELETED THAT COMMENT ON PURPOSE, YOU

[propergenius]

It doesn't matter how you survived, if in fact you did.

As long as I am alive, I will fight for John and Mary Watson with my last breath. I'll keep my friends from harm.

WHOOPS LMFAO I AM SO EMBARRASS APOLOGIES I didn't even notice until it was too late lmfao

[sneakyshoes]

[ _{snort. oh, but you ARE amusing, Mr. Holmes.} ]

Fat lot of good that particular little promise would have done you on a suicide mission in the middle of nowhere, Sherlock. If it weren't for me, you'd already be a liar, again.

[ _{a long sigh:} ] Besiii~ides. [ _{he doesn't want to fight, Sherly. he just wants to banter about silly things.} ] I'm not asking for likelihoods or some such nonsense. [ _{he rolls his eyes, like that is the most boring thing ever.} ] I'm only asking for a theory, Sherlock. Two, even. If you're still capable of using that brain for anything good.

[glassesbrat]

[ Yawn. ]

It's probably not even you. And I doubt you were too stupid not to put in a few failsafes in case of your demise.

[sneakyshoes]

Would it KILL any ONE OF YOU to have a little CREATIVITY or use your MINDS? [ _{oh, he's shouting. now's not a good time, then.} ] One! Bloody! Theory! I just want one bloody theory.

[notelegrams]

I'm afraid you've already had the best shot, Mr. Moriarty.

[sneakyshoes]

Ohhh, look who's decided to be clever today.

Rusty muse is rusty but I can't help myself-

[aimsthegun]

Asking for a handsome bit from this lot, Boss.

BLESS U also that's exactly what I thought haha

[sneakyshoes]

[ _{snort. oh good, this face doesn't enrage him on the mere sight of it.} ]

You'd think stupid speculation wouldn't be so hard. What do you think?

[clever_boy]

[THE ANGRIEST GROWLING]

[sneakyshoes]

[ _GASP ]

Well, he's letting all the crazies out of his little box, isn't he?