on potential loss of close CR

[dicey]

We should get warnings when people are going to leave the city. It's really not fair that we don't. I know, I know, you have no control over this stuff and you wouldn't really care to change things if you did; we have already esta8lished that I'm too "fictional" for you to give that much of a shit a8out! So I'm not even going to 8other to ask you to fix it. Whatever. I'm just saying.

There are things I'd say and do if I knew something like that was coming up, that's all. Like "You understand me 8etter than anyone else does" and "I'm not going to forget that you were the one who came and got me when I was hiding away in that a8andoned 8uilding", and other stuff that's too sappy to say under normal circumstances. May8e even the "l-word", who knows. If you say that to someone who's leaving you'll have the satisfaction of getting it out there, and they won't have too long to grum8le and call you a fool. Win-win.

Or lose-lose, because of the leaving thing.





I'm not going to let anyone else move into his house.

Comments

[samantha_grey]

Really? You'd think by now someone like you would be used to losing things, at home or in these little pockets of reality. Since you don't have any control over it, why live like you're always going to have them? What in the hell was holding the great Vriska Serkets back?

Please, god, don't tell me you're afraid of your own feelings.

[dicey]

I'm not. I always knew it was a possibility. Maybe even an inevitability in this case!

... Who are you, anyway?

[samantha_grey]

So, if you knew it was an inevitability, why didn't you do it? Why let yourself wallow in regret after the fact? [The sound of someone lighting up.]

I've met a few of you. Aradia said something about doomed timelines once. We can go with that. Name's Sam.

[dicey]

Because there's a biiiiig difference between saying stuff someone might not like and having them stick around and not like it for a long time, and saying stuff someone might not like and having them leave and forget it all right away.

Doomed timelines don't exist here.

[samantha_grey]

Hmmm, then we've met, but it's the usual 'I don't know who the hell you are' horseshit you get in these places. You were in the Holy City three times at least while I was there. At this point, I'm sort of getting used to explaining things over and over again to people I've met before.

And, really? You actually cared that much about what anyone besides Tavros thought of you? How'd he manage that feat? You're not exactly Ms. Emotionally Accessible, you know.

[dicey]

It was a different me. There are different timelines all over the place, just not doomed ones. Not outside of that game.

... Tavros? Are you serious?

[samantha_grey]

Fine. And yeah, dead serious. The first one of you got milky-white dead eyes and was lovey-dovey with horn boy. It was sort of funny to watch for about five minutes. Got sickening after a while, though he'd apparently developed a spine somewhere along the way.

It was weird.

[dicey]

Man, I would have loved that when I was thirteen. You don't even want to know how long I spent trying to get him to even begin to sprout one.

[samantha_grey]

See, he and I have nothing in common, and he didn't like talking to me, so I have no clue what put the spine in in the first place. You were damned tired that time around, tired of pretty much everything.

You sound tired now. Chasing your own tail so much must really get exhausting.

[dicey]

I'm not chasing my tail.

[samantha_grey]

Heh, you say that a lot, Vris. Tell me, then. If you aren't chasing your tail, and you're not avoiding your feelings, what are you really doing with all of this? [She took a long drag off of something.] Cause if you ask me, it sure as hell sounds like a hamster running in place when the wheel just seized up.

[dicey]

That doesn't even make sense.

I know how I feel. There's just nothing I can do about any of it, and that sucks.

[samantha_grey]

[She sighed and shrugged.]

There's never anything you can do about it when it's done and they're gone. No forgiveness, no salvation, no kisses and hugs when tehy come back. They don't know your face, and it's like they're another person.

Take some advice. Next time don't wait. You feel something, don't care whether or not they take it badly. Fucking tell them, or you'll be stuck here again.

[dicey]

No shit. I've been around for more than two years; I know the drill.

This situation is totally different from most. If it wasn't, I would have said it ages ago.

[samantha_grey]

How is it different? Really? How could it possibly be different? If you know the drill, I don't get why this is so different, Vris.

[speakveryclearly]

[Vriska you never change always get the last word]

Leaving behind letters for the event of your own departure is too much easier logistically than the reverse. You could make them keep a letter on their person and promise not to open it until then, but that presumes they'll both get to take it with them and respect your privacy until then.

[dicey]

The leaving's not different. The telling is. And it's different because it's a different person.

[dicey]

And remember.

Which he won't.

[speakveryclearly]

So the Animus did figure it out for sure, that nothing changes when you go back.

[samantha_grey]

No shit. I sort of assumed it was something about them. Stop hedging this, Vris. It's not like you and I are even going to remember this conversation tomorrow. Poof out of one random timeline and back into our own. You're seriously dancing around these feelings of yours, and it's weird.

I mean, you're in love with them, aren't you? Were they not in love with you?

[dicey]

The Animus? No, dumbshit, the Animus didn't figure out anything. It was obvious from the beginning; people who leave and come back and then get their memories back say they didn't remember anything when they were gone.

[dicey]

I'm not hedging. It's true.

Humans don't say "in love" for non-romantic love, right?

[she doesn't understand non-romantic love very well; non-sexual is one thing, but even the non-sexual troll romances are still romance to her]

[samantha_grey]

Oh... was this closer to what you guys call moirails?

[dicey]

No. I already have a moirail, and that's romantic love.

It feels like it might be as strong as romance but it isn't. It's weird.

[samantha_grey]

Ok, see, this is where you trolls always get confused, and I'm not the best person to help you. I'm not human, and romance gets muddled into a lot of my relationships.

If it was like a moirail, but you weren't romantic, then you'd probably call him your best friend.