this post is dumb. moving on. canon is pacific rim

[thecount]

Might I have a word with you please?

Firstly, with all due respect, I do find your decision on the relocation of myself lacking in discretion. It is as if I am some plaything to be toyed with at your will. That I am certainly not. Do be wary of the needs of those who occupy this space of yours. As always I continue to stay on my side of the line, you should see to doing the same as well. I am certain our interactions in the future will go along swimmingly if you heed my suggestion.

Now secondly, I wish to discuss the registered name of this account. For one the mere nature of the title infantlizes myself and what I do. One does not simply become "The Count" for applying themselves to the field of mathematics. It simply does not work in that matter. Please be considerate of the sentiments of your fellow colleagues.

Thirdly this is in regards to-- what? What do you mean I've exhausted my complaint limit? There is no such thing!

Comments

[dgaf]

we're all toys.

[thecount]

Perhaps for you but I certainly do not identify with a childish object.

[kaijurockstar]

Thank god, finally, someone put a cork in your complaining pie hole.

And uh, big flashing newsflash, but... you? You?! You take mathematics too far. I mean, you use math as rule of thumb for things.... things that shouldn't even have numbers applied to them. Like, should NEVER have numbers applied to them. Who the heck even does things like that, who isn't, clearly, some sort of bean counting, 'rithmetic loving robot?

[thecount]

My appreciation for the laws of mathematics simply stretch to its' everyday applications. Which, might I add, is everywhere. The same could be argued about your love for the [his face scrunches to one of disdain] kaiju and the very bits you enjoy ripping apart. You might find the study dull but for myself it is how I live.

[kaijurockstar]

So when you say everywhere, are you finally admitting that you count precise sheets of toilet paper for (air quotes, AIR QUOTES EVERYWHERE) "optimum usage and efficiency" or that you count kernels of popcorn before you pop it or the steps you take to get to the kitchen so you can get there faster and hey-- OH MY GOD. Whoa. I think I just realized why your hair is so... (tossing a two-handed point towards that super lame poindexter 'do) ... so that. Whatever that is.

Jeez. You know, pandora's box was opened for a reason, dude. Doing things by the book, measuring all that crap with formulas and equations, it's. Just. So. Dull.

So dull. So boring. Like thinking about it is making me wanna... (insert a long and drawn out yawn.)

[thecount]

Yes because that is precisely how I conduct my daily routines. You know my life so well from cover to cover.

[Yes, go on now. Judge the bowl-cut. Because those horned-rimmed, hipster eyeglasses make you look any better. Hermann will stand firmly on his own two feet whilst readjusting the grip on his cane.]

This may come off as a surprise but contrary to what you believe to be my livelihood, I conduct myself like any other person within this facility. Perhaps with little time for luxury because I do not skimp on minute, mundane obsessive activities such as counting sheets of toilet paper. Even if that being the matter-- What business do you have making a judgement call? Not everything is considered "cool" in your book however there are some who do find pleasure in their own habits.

[outerspecies]

Uh, yeah, TL;DR. I mean, seriously, do you ever just stop talking?

Also, your username is hilarious. I'm just saying.

_{[ yeah now he's doing the OH OH OH OH OH laugh the count does on sesame street, you're welcome hermann ]}

[thecount]

[Yes. Amusing indeed.]

To express valid concerns? No. I'm afraid not. Someone has to keep order in this perimeter.

Of course. Only you with the mind of a seven year old would find humor in such a juvenile title. I wouldn't be surprised if you've several songs memorized by heart.

[outerspecies]

We're in a nexus, Hermann. There is no order. There are no complaint forms to be filled in here.

_{[ how are you going to survive in the multiverse with no complaint forms??? ]}

Yeah, the only difference between you and the Count is that one of you is made out of felt and the other's made out of chalk dust. No one will ever truly know which is which. Also, this is an incredibly important question, so you better not skimp out on an answer: do you count the spiders on the wall? What about the cobwebs in the hall?

[thecount]

Complaint forms or not it is still in ill-form to disregard the legitimate concerns of particular behaviors. Something in which your sight falls short on.

[Trust and believe he will fair through this ordeal, Newton. If he can fair in his previous affairs for the past ten years (with you especially) then surely he can overcome through all of this with his sanity still in tact.]

As if I have the time to count the insects that occupy the space before me. Unlike yourself my time is utilized for far more pragmatic purposes. Put shortly: No. I do not. Are you quite satisfied now or must we continue on your insipid accusations of me assuming the role of a chalk puppet?