Because he just won't shut up about this

[dealsinshipping]

See? I told ya I'm not a villain! [Evidently Varrick has either been watching the wrong series or he's just plain in denial.] So how 'bout that season finale, eh? That sure was 'intense', as you youngsters call it. Why, that giant spirit... vine... thing almost poked a hole in my noggin'. And did you see that Nuktuk choreography? I couldn't be more proud! Here's to Book Three: Varrick!

[Hang on, incoming message from his mun. He turns away to listen, but his face sours by the second.]

...Huh? ... Uhuh. ... What do you mean, that's not what the third book's going to be called?! Of course it is! What else would you name a season that's going to be all about me?!

[He shakes his head in a frustrated manner, then calms down again. Steady breaths, now.]

So anyway, I've been going over that application you have so far and I've got a few notes. Minor additions, if you will. Very little things. For example, strengths. Where's the mention of my dashing good looks and generous nature? My great sense of humor? You have got to pay attention during my scenes, mun! Heck, you know what? I'll just have Zhu Li compile a list of edits you'll want to consider. [He rolls his eyes, then casts an idle glance to the side.] ...By the way, there is nothing funny about Operation Winged Freedom being followed up by that little wing game of yours.

Comments

[sketchingideals]

I know it's not my place to say, but I don't think overwhelming her would be a really good idea...

[Also mun, he knows that look. Please don't. He doesn't mind having CR with this man if he shows up, but no amount of eccentric would ever replace Oswald. :c]

[dealsinshipping]

Who's overwhelming her? I'm giving her the honor of trying to portray me. That's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, right there.

[sketchingideals]

Well... it might be better to give her these details a little bit at a time. That's all!

[dealsinshipping]

That's why I'm having a list compiled, kid. With only two weeks left, we've gotta set these things in motion! This application's gonna be huge.

[And by "huge", he means... ...He doesn't even know what he means. Something impressive.]

[sketchingideals]

Well, I guess that makes sense! Your mun doesn't want to be like my mun and wait until she's panicking...

[Jeb, I both resent and resemble that remark. >:T]

[dealsinshipping]

You know what they say, never put off 'till tomorrow what can get you ahead in life today!

[Actually, nobody but Varrick says that, and he only said it just now. It still sounds pretty deep, though.]

[sketchingideals]

Oh, really? I can't say I've ever heard it worded like that before...

[dealsinshipping]

Please, kid, I didn't get where I am today by spouting nonsense. [Yes he did. He totally did. But hey, have a topic change!]

So you're in that wing place, right? Gimme the scoop, what's it all about?

[markofthewise]

You're just lucky you didn't blow up my statue when you were trying to start the war.

1/2

[dealsinshipping]

[His hands sure are flying up fast in a defensive manner, there.] Hey! Hey hey hey, hey. Whoah now. I didn't start any wars. Unalaq did. Besides-

2/2

[dealsinshipping]

[He breaks off abruptly, lowering his hands again. Then he leans closer to Sokka, his eyes narrowing. Could it be? Is that a realization he's having?

Naahhh. There's no way he's looking at what he thinks he's looking at. That's crazy.]

You know, you look familiar...

[markofthewise]

[God these young'ns don't recognize anyone, do they?]

Sokka. I helped save the world.

[dealsinshipping]

[Cultural heritage? What cultural heritage? You mean the one that Varrick blew up a few weeks ago? At least he knows about Sokka from a more political context. Which just ends up making him confused, because he's pretty sure Councilman Sokka was an older gentleman who died.

He'd argue it's a different Sokka, but he did just run into Avatar Aang a couple weeks ago in this place. And Avatar Wan. And Tarrlok, that one sure was supposed to be dead too.]

So that was, what, fifty years ago? Ninety?

[markofthewise]

I dunno. All of your... stuff hasn't happened yet. Because... time travel. Things. I dunno. It's really confusing.

[dealsinshipping]

[No kidding it's confusing. How many more of these young old people is Varrick going to end up running into?]

Yes. I mean, no. All right. Just so we're clear that you are who I think you are and not who I don't think you are.

[markofthewise]

[About as many as these old young people, probably.]

I am who I think you think I am, unless you think I'm not me, then I'm not who you think I am. I think.

[dealsinshipping]

You're right! [A quick finger snap.] But knowing my impeccable instincts, I do think you are who you really are, so I know you are who I think you are.

[markofthewise]

Well, that does make things easier! Buuuut I have no idea who you are. Are you the guy who played me in the play? You kind of have the chin for it.

[dealsinshipping]

[What. No. What?]

You're looking at the one and only Varrick, owner of Varrick Global Industries! We're the biggest shipping enterprise in the world, but we've also produced a few technological innovations that'll make your head spin! [He slams a hand down on Sokka's shoulder, grinning.] But don't you worry, I won't blame you for not having heard of me, considering I haven't been born yet. In my time? Why, I'm only a little bit more famous than you.

[markofthewise]

[Sokka glances warily at the hand on his shoulder. Okay. You can stay. For now.]

... what kind of technological innovations?

[You are speaking his language now, Mr. New Mechanist.]

[dealsinshipping]

[Good, good. Don't mind Varrick as he gets a little carried away, here.]

Speedboats, customized ships and yachts, snowmobiles, inflatable snowsuits, hairdye products... You name it! My latest venture? Moving pictures, also known as movers. You haven't seen action until you've seen it in a mover!

[markofthewise]

Wow, you're introducing all of that? That's great! Why weren't you around seventy years ago?

[dealsinshipping]

You'd have to ask my parents, kid!

[markofthewise]

... maybe they could be convinced to have you earlier.

[That's how it works, of course.]

[dealsinshipping]

Who knows? No time like the present and no better moment for revolutionary development than yesterday!

[markofthewise]

Exactly. I don't want to die before I get to see the first Mover.

[dealsinshipping]

No kidding, it's a doozy! [He pauses for a second, looking like he's considering something, then kind of mutters to himself for a bit.] Well, the first real mover is, anyway. The ostrich horse thing was just a test run. [And back to being overly excited!] But then came Nuktuk, the Hero of the South!

[fantasticfireferret]

..."little wing game"?

[Hi, Varrick! Have the cop who put you in the slammer.]

[dealsinshipping]

[Hey Mako! Come to see the billionaire who put you in the slammer, eh? Don't worry, no hard feelings, Varrick will be his usual charismatic self.]

You got it! That's where my mun's going to be shipping me off to! [Get it? Shipping? And he owns a shipping business? Yeahhh.] Apparently, everyone gets a pair of wings and they're in need of brilliant entrepreneurs like myself.

[Unbeknownst to Varrick, there's also experiments and a war that his mun hasn't had the heart to tell him about.]