dear_mun | (no subject)

How would this ever be a waste of time?

Hey, if I had time, and if I really felt like doing it, I'd give you a list.

How very Jeff Winger of you to think something's a waste of time before it even really happens.

Wow Annie, you've caught me. Finally, I can stop living this lie of shame and ridicule, and fully embrace the joy and wonder that is life.

[If she rolled her eyes more, she'd probably get dizzy.] Would it really hurt that much to drop the sarcasm for a little while? It can't possibly be that bad.

You know what, it probably would hurt, but the thing is, I've never dropped it to test that theory. [Is he being honest or sarcastic? You be the judge.]

You keep trying, though.

Keep trying? Why bother when I'm completely used to your sarcasm by now?

I'm just saying maybe you should give something a chance before completely writing it off for once. Everybody already knows you've mastered the skill of apathy, Jeff. [She shrugs, feigning lack of interest. As if Annie Edison could ever let something go that easily.] It's nothing new or exciting.

Apathy, huh?

Alright, let me let you in on a little secret: it's not a skill you can master. It's a skill you are born with. And you, Annie Edison, are not made to be apathetic. You are made to obsess over every little detail, no matter what crappy situation we're stuck in, because like it or not, you can't live without it. So don't try and put this off as nothing, and while you try to not look for the problems, even though you really want to, I'll do what I do best.

What you do best? What, like pretending – yes, pretending – not to care about what happens around you? I doubt many people actually want to be like that; you can keep that for yourself. And yeah, so maybe I just so happen to obsess a little bit. [A severe understatement, and she knows it.] At least I actually have a heart that functions correctly.

[Let's bring it home with something meant to cut deep but also completely irrelevant, Edison.]

When you finally decide that doing what you do best isn't really working out for you, we'll still be here. I promise not to say 'I told you so.'

Yeah. You've got me quivering with anticipation over here. Or was it fear you were looking for?

Why would I be looking for either? I'm not you, Jeff.

That's right, Annie: You're you. So why don't you go be you somewhere your Disney-eyes can't start sending me on some trip down my conscience. [And out comes the ~~safety net~~ phone.]

Disney-eyes? [Scoff. She does not have Disney-eyes.] My Disney-eyes can only send you on that trip if you already feel guilty. I could walk away right now and your conscious would still eat at you.

[Damn that cellphone and whoever he's constantly texting.]

Right, or you can just stop paying attention. That's an easy way out, too. Classic Winger.

[Scoff back. It's been proven.] 'fraid not. Even though I used it as a figure of speech, my conscious can only consume what's healthy for it. Guilt about you isn't what I call healthy. [Is he going too far with this? He thinks he's going too far with this.]

Or I could just walk away.

[He definitely went too far with that.

It's left her speechless.] ... What is that supposed to mean?

[... Dammit.]

Nothing, Annie. It means nothing, alright?

[Nope. He's not getting away that easily.] If it meant nothing, you wouldn't have said it.

What does it mean, Jeff?

[Those Care Bear eyes are going to slowly kill him, aren't they?] Look, I know from... more experience than I would like to admit, that guilt-trips aren't exactly a walk in the park, and it just so happens to turn out that guilt-tripping about you is pretty much like Snow White kicking Prince Charming in the balls for an intense breach of personal space.

Simply put, upsetting you isn't exactly on the top of my agenda.

[Well, that went better than expected. Talk about a massive weight being lifted off he shoulders. Now this is a different kind of speechless.]

Oh. Well ... it's not at the top of mine, either.

[The smile honestly couldn't be hidden, alright? It's not her fault.]

Annie, the day you could ever upset me will be the day Shirley stops baking, Pierce stops being racist, Troy and Abed stop being nerds, and Britta stops being Britta. [This is nearly sincere for him.] I'm just unupsettable. [Not a real word, and not likely.]

Still ... I shouldn't have said what I did. [Is this just her clearing her conscience? Probably not. She does feel like a small child again, though. Funny how that always seems to happen around him.] It was uncalled for. I'm sorry.

Even if you are unupsettable. [Which she really does not believe in the slightest.]

Eh, it's alright kiddo - [He's inwardly cringing at the flippant use of that word - flippancy is one of his many specialities, afterall.] You didn't know.

[Kiddo. Right. That definitely helps. Her cringe isn't so much inward as it is blatantly outward.]

Yeah. You know me, Jeff. Naïve Annie.

[And things were going so well, too.]

[There's a groan here.] Start with the Disney Face again and I am walking. You know what I meant.

[There's not going to be a Disney Face. She's not giving him the benefit. Annie Edison is stronger than that.]

No, don't worry. Your feet can stay planted. It's fine.

You're sure? Because honestly, I was planning on getting out of here anyway. Don't want to get sucked up into another mess I can barely find bearable.

[Another mess? Oh.]

Yeah! Totally ... sure. It's fine, don't worry. [Too much. Slow down a bit.] I don't want to keep you if you have something better to be doing, anyway.

[He grimaces.] In all honesty, I don't think them working on a personality section for me is something better. [Looks like he's staying.]

A personality section for you shouldn't be that bad, though, right? After all, who loves Jeff Winger more than Jeff Winger?

[She's ~~secretly~~ very glad about this.]

Cute, true, and cruel, Miss Edison.

Cute and cruel should be my middle name. [The smile she wears is perhaps a bit too innocent to be believable.]

So, personality section. Does that mean they're forcing you into somewhere against your will?

It's the road less desired [solely by him] but it's the road I'm travelling.

Funny thing though; they're being positively Annie about it all.

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can i just say your annie is incredible

wow, thank you. :') your jeff is on point, too.

:D

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