[Oh, it is so very, very human. It frustrates Castiel to no end, but no matter how much he tries to push it aside, there is a tiny bud of fondness for all this somewhere in him. After all, all this has given him a strange, bizarre sort of home with Dean and Samandriel.]
For what it's worth, I hope you are being treated well.
[ Anna almost looks surprised for a moment, like out of all the things he could have said— Well. He was always a little more human than the rest of the Family. ]
[Castiel rarely wastes time with regrets. He has a mission to accomplish, charges to keep safe. But Anna...
Anna.
If he has one regret in all of this...]
I do.
[He was wrong to turn her in, and he knows it. It's done and he can't take it back, but his slow fall to humanity is also bringing the slow fall into having feelings of his own.
She deserved better. He understand that now. Too late, but he does.]
[ She looks at him for a little while. Maybe looks through him, like she'll be able to reach in and touch his Grace and know he's being honest. It's a human thought and despite everything, Anna understands Castiel better than most. Humanity has a steep learning curve. (And death, well; maybe it's not so permanent after all, especially in strange places like this.)
She reaches out to curl a hand at his elbow. (Again: a human action.) ]
[Castiel isn't big on physical affection, but... the gesture is strangely comforting. He's not the one who needs comfort - no really, he isn't. Absolutely not. He's still a soldier, regardless of circumstances.
Yes.]
I have... rebelled.
[The implication isn't all that subtle. He's hunted, exiled, cut off, falling. But fighting for what he believes in, Anna. It took too long, but you helped him get there.]
[ That had been, at some point, what she'd wanted for him. For him to realize, for Castiel to know for himself what it all meant, but she knows the price that comes with it. Her hand falls back down to her side; she doesn't look sympathetic or pitying, just plain. ]
[Good. Castiel wouldn't know what to do with pity. He's still a soldier. Emotional pain and hardship is still new to him, but he can't let them drag him down. As long as he is doing the right thing, he can march on. And so he does.
He nods, just slightly. He understands so much more now, Anna. And while he is not in the habit of looking back, the price you paid because of him will never be forgotten. One day, he hopes you will be free again. Little does he know.]
[ In the end, Anna will make her own choices: for better or for worse. Maybe they're not the right ones — maybe her time with the angels, back home, will make her remember that doubt has no place in an angel's heart, especially one like Anna — one who used to command.
But for now, Castiel stands in-front of her, weathered and worn but standing, and the smile she gives him is small. ]
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[No really.]
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That's some small comfort, at least.
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For what it's worth, I hope you are being treated well.
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Do you, Castiel? [ Wish me well? ]
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Anna.
If he has one regret in all of this...]
I do.
[He was wrong to turn her in, and he knows it. It's done and he can't take it back, but his slow fall to humanity is also bringing the slow fall into having feelings of his own.
She deserved better. He understand that now. Too late, but he does.]
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She reaches out to curl a hand at his elbow. (Again: a human action.) ]
You look more tired than I remember.
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Yes.]
I have... rebelled.
[The implication isn't all that subtle. He's hunted, exiled, cut off, falling. But fighting for what he believes in, Anna. It took too long, but you helped him get there.]
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It's not an easy path.
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[Good. Castiel wouldn't know what to do with pity. He's still a soldier. Emotional pain and hardship is still new to him, but he can't let them drag him down. As long as he is doing the right thing, he can march on. And so he does.
He nods, just slightly. He understands so much more now, Anna. And while he is not in the habit of looking back, the price you paid because of him will never be forgotten. One day, he hopes you will be free again. Little does he know.]
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But for now, Castiel stands in-front of her, weathered and worn but standing, and the smile she gives him is small. ]
Yes. It is.
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