Voice testing; Canon is Warrior U; considering Paradisa

[friendshipismurder]

A game?

Oh! Oh! I love games! Especially games with cutting.

Slashing.

Stabbing nihihihi!

I don't know anyone there but I guess that's good. It'd be great if he was there to, you know, tie loose ends up and all! But I'm sure he'll come there soon right? He has to if we go there! I bet Finn'll follow! He always does!

But sure I'd love to play a game. I don't even need to know what it's about right now! I'll figure it out as I go on. I kinda make my own rules, y'know?

With slashing. And cutting. And stabbing and jabbing and

Comments

[elysiontoabyss]

Twist and turn goes the knife, ahah! Pull it out and oh, what's this? What is this!? B-blood! BloooOOOOOOD!!!

[A masked man yells in a sing-songy voice, running around and fluttering about in his cloak. He stops suddenly and kneels on the ground. Without a moment's notice, his head gives a swift turn to Hevvin.]

... Wear a raincoat when playing, kid.

[angrytadpole]

...You're even worse than I thought.

[friendshipismurder]

A raincoat?!

[Hevvin makes a blech sound, complete with sticking his tongue out. The sad thing is?]

What's that? Some kinda damp coat or something? No thanks! I've got a coat of my own that's 100% unicorn hair.

[Yeah. He doesn't even know what a raincoat is.]

[friendshipismurder]

And you're a jerk!

[Oh he remembers you. You're the great big jerk who called him a twerp of a mount. But you are the twerp! YOU ARE THE TWERP SIR!]

Don't think I forgot about last time! You think you're so great! With your height?!

[cruel_kindness]

And skewering?

[angrytadpole]

What does my height have to do with anything?

[Yeah he hasn't made the connection from "Harv's puny horse" to "the homeless guy that was apparently actually a unicorn."]

[marearcana]

...Let me guess. You're that unicorn trying to kill him, aren't you.

[friendshipismurder]

....You're pretty stupid huh?

[Seriously why haven't you made the connection Darren?

And like he's one to talk.]

[elysiontoabyss]

Unicorn?

[Abyss approaches Hevvin and starts touching his coat and horns.]

Pretty, fanciful, goes "neeeeeiiiigheeeigheeigheeeigh" [he mimicked in a hoarse voice, followed by some light hacking] merrily along the rainbow road?

[friendshipismurder]

Oh! Oh I've never tried skewering before! Well I guess I have but I always associated it with stabbing nihihihi!

And chopping! Oh I forgot chopping!

[friendshipismurder]

Trying and succeeding if Harv had just been nice submissive Harv instead of stupid heroic Harv!

[He stomps on the ground, whinnying a little as small clouds of dirt start spouting up. He's like a child.]

[cruel_kindness]

Oh, come on. You of all people should know that skewering and stabbing are two different things.

[Can we not talk about this?]

[friendshipismurder]

[Hevvin pulls away as Abyss moves to touch him, flailing a little bit. An angry neighing sound escapes his throat.]

Don't touch me! Keep your hands off me, you filthy thing.

[Hevvin gives a small sneer at the next statement. At the patronizing.]

Once upon a time. Sure. Rainbow road's closed now.

[Was there a rainbow road? He doesn't remember one. It's been such a long time since he had even seen other unicorns that he barely remembers what their lives had been like in earnest. As far as he knows maybe the stereotypes the humans apply were true. And he hates them.

Maybe that was part of why he killed them. He hates them so much still. He misses them so much still.]

[friendshipismurder]

Well it kind of is when it's with my horn!

[He points at his horn, as if this makes some kind of point.]

I mean it's generally stabbing but when it goes all the way through you could saaaaay its skewering!

[cruel_kindness]

Hmm... Mind showing me how sharp that thing is? You can use it on that tree.

[She points to a random nearby tree.]

I'd like to see how deep you can make it.

[Um, please?
Don't worry, 'Shy. I've got a plan. He'll just get stuck in the tree, then crisis averted.]

[elysiontoabyss]

[Abyss leaps back and does a spin before nearly pretending to do a pratfall. Ever the dramatic type, the man can never let go of showing off.]

You know, I've always thought what I should do when I ever met a unicorn.

I could take it home for my daughter. She always loved unicorns when I read about them to her. ... or...

1/4

[friendshipismurder]

What, that?

[He points back at the tree with his thumb, smiling.]

No problem! Watch.

[And then his form starts to shift. Goes translucent for a moment as his body seems to move in on itself, forming a blob before starting to restructure itself into a tangible shape.]

[angrytadpole]

I think that would be you, actually.

[Feigning disinterest.]

What's with you and Finn, anyway?

2/4

[friendshipismurder]

[And then a small, white unicorn with pink mane is there instead of a weird, tall teen with a horn and chalky white skin.]

Nihi!

[The sound, as it is, is meant to be a boast. About how it'll be a piece of cake and how he could dig his horn all the way into the tree like this.

Words, in this form, kind of escape Hevvin.]

[friendshipismurder]

[Hevvin kicks one hoof against the ground, getting ready to charge at the tree.

And then he's off, little legs thumping across the ground as he charges that tree as much as hard as he can, whinnying as happily as a psychotic unicorn might as he goes.

He hits the tree with a satisfying thunk, horn burying itself deep into the tree, wood giving way as it's pierced and sap oozing from the wound. Hevvin grits his teeth a bit, surprised (like the dumbass he is) at the force of hitting the tree. But he smiles when he opens his eyes to see just how close to the tree he is. He must have gotten in deep!]

[friendshipismurder]

[He stops smiling when he realizes he can't back up out of the tree. He pulls, and tags, and nothing is working to help him get out of it. He keeps pulling harder, but nothing is working. And it kind of hurts.]

Nihi!

[That? Is a sound of aggravation. And surprise. And hurt. Why you gotta be this way tree.]

[marearcana]

I ask this with full understanding that I may not receive a meaningful answer, but why? Why are you so intent on killing Finn?

[cruel_kindness]

[Fluttercruel smirks. Her plan worked, and the obviously homicidal... thing is going to be stuck there for a very long time.]

Have fun.

[She walks away, smacking the pink ponything in the ass as she passes by.]

[friendshipismurder]

Sure! You can take me home to your daughter! We'll have lots of fun.

Lots of fun stabbing holes in her nihihihi

[A part of him thinks about how he meant to think that last part, not say it. Hevvin's confused for a moment about whether he said it out loud or not, or if the stupid human will notice. But he brushes it off due to his curiosity about what the man is leaving out.]

Or..or what? Or what?!

[friendshipismurder]

[The unicorn grunts and whinny's a little more before Hevvin turns back to his human form, pressing his hands against the tree for extra force. He can't turn around to face Fluttershy as she leaves, but he sure can scream.]

Hey!

HEY!

Where do you think you're going?! Get back here! This is an oak! You haven't seen me try it on a fern yet!

[Don't leave him. Oh god don't leave him he NEEDS company.]