so about those "Darkest Hour" feels

[rustypistons]

Of course I was animated! After all that we've been through, not only on Earth, but in the days before, and they come back and tell me that...?

That was home. And we have lost it. Again. We have lost our base. We have lost each other.

Though I care for him deeply and know that his decisions are right in a high majority of the cases, I am still well within my rights to blame Optimus for the situation we've found ourselves in! All of our cycles upon cycles upon cycles together should grant me at least that much with him.

...If he's even still online.

Comments

[stilettoed]

Hm... Well, Doctor, perhaps you're not as dense as your fellows, seeing where the blame for Cybertron's ultimate fate truly lies.

[stilettoed]

Though my lord Megatron made sure to see that there is hardly any "if" about that last statement.

[neverputincharge]

Ratchet...

[He has so many mixed feelings over that decision.]

[rustypistons]

We're just going to have to keep running. Hiding. Sacrificing all that we have for survival. Every time we seem to get a leg up, we get shot down again somehow!

[rustypistons]

He's Optimus. Coming back from the impossible is hardly new for him, and Megatron's track record isn't exactly spotless. Just as I highly doubt you were able to take down Wheeljack so easily.

[neverputincharge]

I know that. I wanted to see our world revived too.

[rustypistons]

...All of that hope for nothing. We would've been better off never knowing about the keys in the first place.

[neverputincharge]

[He's so conflicted. Getting their world back, versus the Earth and Miko.]

Maybe we were. Not for them, probably none of this woulda happened.

[rustypistons]

It's not that I haven't come to appreciate this world and its inhabitants, Bulkhead. I've even...come to see the children as part of our team. Our family. And even if that wasn't the case, you know that, like Optimus, I would never want to put anyone in harms way because of our war like that.

But it's Earth versus Cybertron. Or even the children versus Cybertron. It's...unfair. Most of all to Optimus and his steadfast morals.

[neverputincharge]

I know, Ratchet. We kept humans out of it for as long as we could. But the cons got them involved.

No, it's not fair. Not fair to anyone. The kids...they were even willin' to give up their lives for Cybertron. [Or at least Miko and Jack were. Raf looked nervous even as he agreed. Maybe June was right, they never should've been involved, allowed to get this close to them.]

[rustypistons]

They were? [It starts as a chuckle but ends as a sigh.] They're remarkable, for humans. They're remarkable, period. We've rubbed off on them a bit too much.

...What of their parents and families? We didn't even tell Agent Fowler what we were doing. Nobody but us knows that we split up across the country, taking the children with their respective guardians. June Darby even called me, asking about Jack-- [His fists ball.] So much for keeping the children hidden from the Decepticons.

[neverputincharge]

Yep, staring Knock Out and Starscream down too. [He might be a little proud of them, though it's tempered by the thought that they could've lost them too.]

Yeah, they didn't get the chance to contact their families, say good bye or nothin'. ...we shoulda been keepin' a better watch on them. I mean, Jack and Raf were both attacked at their homes, after the Cons and MECH found them.

[What kind of guardians are they, when they pretty much leave them to fend for themselves to search for relics.]

[rustypistons]

And Agent Fowler assured us that they would be kept safe and off of the Decepticon radar. Sure, it meant they were around less, but they were, supposedly, safe from harm. I suppose it was only a matter of time before they were rediscovered. As well as Megatron finding the location of the base.

If we're ever able to regroup, we should figure out some way of sending word to them. So they know the children are fine. [He doesn't bring up the fact that he's now alone. Bulkhead, Bumblebee, and Arcee at least have someone by their side. And the idea of Smokescreen being alone out in the world he barely understands is a bit frightening in and of itself. The idea of the loneliness doesn't make him afraid, but even when he's been alone, he's had a team to come back. Or Optimus. (Or even Orion.) Now, when things go wrong--and it is when, not an if--he won't be anywhere near to help.] I suppose we'll all have to moonlight as our respective vehicle modes for the time being.

[neverputincharge]

Yeah, even all the protection of their world could keep them safe.

I know Miko's been wantin' to contact her host parents, but if the 'cons are trackin' us... [He doesn't like the idea of Smokescreen out there on his own either. That kid's too new to this world.] Right now, we're gonna have to find her fue-er, food and sooner or later I'm gonna have to get me some Energon. [Which means possible encounters with 'cons, but it wasn't like there was time to grab any from the stock pile.]

[rustypistons]

I...should have picked up the children from their school. [Whoops here comes that sudden tsunami of guilt that maybe this wouldn't have happened if he had just done that. Maybe the Cons wouldn't have found the kids. And used them as leverage. And forced Optimus to--to--] And when Miss Darby called, saying she hadn't heard from Jack all day, I didn't pay it that much mind. I was keeping track of all of you. Waiting for the word to open the spacebridge. Or waiting for...any word. I couldn't just abandon my post, but I...

[Scrap. Too much is happening at once. And he'll have to sort it out later. When he's alone with his thoughts.] Tell Miko that I'm...sorry, would you?

[neverputincharge]

[Right, the kids had been in school that day. School, the one loose link in the protection. So much got looked over in the determination to get to Cybertron and get this done.]

Why didn't you pick them up? It wouldn't have taken that long. We woulda been fine.

[thelastprime]

...


My apologies, old friend. You are well within your rights to be angry with me.

[rustypistons]

Fine? Do you have any idea what it's like for me to have to be glued to the comm links and to that monitor every time all of you go out on a mission? Do you realize how often these missions don't go well? And given the grave situation, the importance of it, and how easily it can and did go wrong...

[It just makes his anger flare up again, but he's not sure for a moment if it's at the well-deserved blame or at himself.

Oh yeah. Definitely himself. But he can let himself be angry at whoever else he likes in the process.]

That doesn't excuse the carelessness with which I handled the situation. But also understand why I didn't find it conceivable to leave.

[rustypistons]

Too right I am! Smokescreen had better learn his place one of these days, lecturing me on battlefield decisions and how you make them.

[But it's not an anger he can keep up. Of course he's still angry; of course he's still hurt. But it's also Optimus. Who decided to risk sacrificing himself in order to keep the rest of them safe. Who gave up the ghost of the dream of restoring home in order to keep an entire other sentient race safe from harm and having a fate like Cybertron.

He's torn in all directions at the moment, understandably so, when it comes to Optimus.]

You should have gone as well. The Decepticons were going to destroy the base; they had to. The bridge data would have been gone with the rest of it. They wouldn't have had anything to track us down with.

[thelastprime]

Smokescreen will grow in time, Ratchet. You must be patient, and instruct him. You are his guidance now.

[Those eyes sadden. The last thing he wanted was to see you hurt, Ratchet. He completely takes the responsibility of destroying the only chance Cybertron had, but...this is different now. Earth had become ensnared in a war by chance, and thus, wrongfully doomed.

He would not let that happen. Not again.

Those baby blues dart away for a second.]

I could not take that risk.

[And then they turn back.]

Perhaps it is...not as it appears.

[rustypistons]

[That's very comforting. Being Smokescreen's guidance.

Being, in fact, the de facto leader of the Autobots on Earth.

When they're separated from each other by hundreds if not thousands of miles. With no other instructions other than 'get back together when there's an actual workable plan to fight'.

He can't wipe the look of dawning horror off his face this time.]

Optimus, you should have come with me! It didn't have to end this way! If you're gone...really and truly gone this time...if Megatron has actually outlived you, I...

[He shakes his head.] Even if it isn't all as it appears, this is still the situation we're in. Who knows what's happened to you, and what's going to happen to the rest of us. We each have to manage on our own, for possibly quite a long time. And in all that time, not only will Megatron be hunting us, he'll be attempting to take over the entire planet with his forces.

My thoughts on what you did with the Omega Lock mean nothing in light of this. We need you, now more than ever.

[thelastprime]

[That look of horror is only met with a small...almost minuscule smile. Not one of joy, because you can sense the pain behind it, the pain of his spark that is continuously aching. The Matrix which fuels it...fuels everything that makes him Prime. How often he wished he could just cry out, to do what Ratchet had done in the base. To give a moment's desperation.

But no, all he could do was...be Optimus Prime. The beacon of the Autobots. And that's what he would be for Ratchet now, no matter how much it hurt.]

Ratchet, you know as well as I do that Megatron would be searching for me. He has turned our war, as pointless as it is, into a personal vendetta towards myself. He is not doing anything for Cybertron any longer.

I would not succumb you to that on my spark.

[Those ear pieces swivel, as if thinking while he avoids Ratchet's gaze again.]

It may have been our darkest hour, but there is always light, old friend.

[wheeljackofalltrades]

...Hey Doc.

I guess I missed out on a lot again, huh.

[rustypistons]

[For as long as he's known Optimus, even back in his Orion Pax days, Ratchet has always been the far more emotional of the two. Though he prefers being a bot of science and logic, knowing sometimes he has to push what he feels aside, he's hardly been one to keep his outbursts to himself. In a way, he reacts enough for the both of them. He understands very well the kind of position that Optimus is in, the responsibility and the power, and what that can do--he's seen it happen himself, to his dear old friend.

He can read Prime's emotions better than the rest of the team, certainly, but it's when those emotions are outright shown that strikes Ratchet the most. Rare moments. And even that much hurts.]

We could certainly use some of that light right about now. It was bad enough when all Megatron had was his ship. Now he has that massive base of operations. In Jasper. Our home far, far away from home.

We've let him destroy both of our homes.

[He sighs, a short, frustrated noise, as he shuts his eyes, not concealing the pain on his face. Optimus wants him to keep the faith, but Ratchet isn't sure he wants to hear one of those pep talks right now. He can't just not be deeply upset (an understatement to be certain), and he isn't entirely certain there's anything Optimus can say to him that can make him feel any better. He needs time first. Time to work everything out on his own. Away from...his closest friend and leader.]

I am tired of this war. I'm tired of running and hiding. Always being a few steps behind, low on supplies and luck. It's a miracle we've all lasted as long as we have. I don't know how you do it. How you've always been able to keep this up. Perhaps it's a gift of the Matrix, but...that's always been a gift of yours, I think.

I'm not like that. None of us are.

[rustypistons]

You certainly did. And you only showed up long enough to get yourself blasted out of the sky. [That tone has more bite to it than he intends.] I can't even patch you up. At least you enjoy being out on your own.