canon is grand theft auto

[gotlost]

Hey. Look, sister.

I know you like the kinda guy I am. That's okay, I guess. But I ain't going anywhere without The Lost. I ain't leaving my brothers behind. Billy'd make even more of a wreck of things if I wasn't there anyway.

I don't mind sticking around here for a while, but this isn't gonna be pretty if you cart me off to some weird-ass place. I don't wanna go anywhere. Comprende?

Comments

[adifferentbreed]

The Lost... what? Amulet? Grail? [She looks pointedly at his mustache.] Razor?

[gotlost]

[That actually gets a snort out of him, congrats.]

Motorcycle club.

hi stranger

[aversiontoredlights]

Good luck convincin' 'em. Muns are pretty rigid.

[adifferentbreed]

What kind of crap name for a bike club is that? Hardly threatening, is it?

By the way, these people are crap at listening to what you want.

I KNOW YOU I play thingcalledjoe! Hi again!!

[gotlost]

"Convincin'" people's my strong suit.

[gotlost]

What, you like those fuckin' "Angels of Death" deadbeats, little lady? It's got meaning for us. But the guns aren't for show. [He smirks.] 'Sides, most of my brothers are ugly enough even if they weren't tough sons of bitches.

Fine by me. I'm used to it. I'm good at convincin' people.

[onyourknees]

The stubborn ones are always the most fun to drag away.

[gotlost]

Whatever, man--

[NVM HE IS NOW STARING]

What the FUCK?

[adifferentbreed]

[The look of "bitch please" he gets after she's called a little lady couldn't be more clear.]

Think all the names are kind of shit. It's pretty much just a big wank at the end of the day.

[There's a lot of misplaced hatred here. She can only assume Paladins chose their moniker too.]

Not these people. Vultures, all of 'em.

[gotlost]

[He seems to shrug it off. His "nicknames" for people (the ones he doesn't hate, anyway) don't sound genuinely condescending, at least. They weren't meant to be. Even the "little lady"s. This is a guy who's closest friends lovingly insult each other daily.] Wow. So is there a regular guy who shits in your cereal in the mornin', or is this a special day?

Yeah? How's that?

[spazmatoidstarling]

Fuck me, I totally know how you feel about leaving your family. Can you believe this bitch-ass mun wants me to dump my big sisters? So fucking uncool, right?!

[gotlost]

I hear you, little sister. There's no fucking way I'm bowing out and ditching the Lost.

[spazmatoidstarling]

The Lost? Is that your group name? Shit, that sounds so awesome!

[Mood swing, ahoy!]

Ugh, why the fuck don't we have a group name? This is bullshit!

[gotlost]

... Oookay.

[He'll roll with it.]

The Lost Mototcycle Club, yup.

[adifferentbreed]

That guy comes 'round every morning to try it. I can never get his blood out from under my nails, it's such a damper on my day.

[After that, she gives him a beatific smile.]

They exist to make you uncomfortable at the least and in agony at the worst. I think they get off on it.

[spazmatoidstarling]

[This isn't even half of it. This girl is on all the drugs... Or at least acts like it.]

Fuck me, that is cool! Shit, shit, shit, can I join?! I'm a totally awesome driver!

[NO. NO. ABORT. RUN, MAN, RUN.]

[gotlost]

Whoah, whoah, whoah, whoah, amiga. You ride?

[gotlost]

I like you already, amiga.

[SMIRK hey she's better than their club's president, Billy. John-boy's vice president, so it says on his jacket.]

Sounds like the LC cops.

[adifferentbreed]

Everybody does.

[That is the biggest load of bullshit but Gerry's amused.]

I can almost guarantee the writers are worse. Cops can only make you try to do things, the writers usually succeed.

[gotlost]

I'll agree with you on the cops. I doubt I'm gonna get in that much shit with the writers. This one doesn't really wanna go anywhere right now. Suits me fine.

Man, who knew writers and pigs'd be in the same fuckin' league now. [almost.]

[adifferentbreed]

Doesn't mean she can't make your life hell in the meantime. I can't get into any game because of who I am but mine still tortures me pretty regularly.

Well they're all sadists, so it makes sense.

[gotlost]

I got enough torture to deal with my regular life. Doubt she's gonna make it any different.

I know this because of your icon credits! Plus who else knows GTA round these parts?

[aversiontoredlights]

We got somethin' in common then.

OH COOL <3 Hey again!

[gotlost]

Yeah? What kind of convincing you do? We could probably swap some stories.

<3

[aversiontoredlights]

Let's just say some guy got a bit too up close an' personal with my sister. I "convinced" him to lay off.

[gotlost]

You don't gotta sugarcoat it with a cherry on top, y'know.

[adifferentbreed]

Define torture.

[You have no idea how skeptical she is right now. Except you probably do because Gerry's never mastered the art of poker face.]

[gotlost]

Long story.

[gerry, john-boy don't even give a shit.]

[adifferentbreed]

You were dumped, weren't you?

[gotlost]

[A snort.] No. A long time ago, kinda, but that's not it.

[adifferentbreed]

Hmm. Oh, were you locked up? Have a bit of a... hard time behind bars?

[Yes, she is uncouth enough to go there.]

[gotlost]

Whoah, hey. Terry and Clay are the homosexuals, not me.

Let's just say I got a lotta shit between the cops, politicians, mafia assholes, and a psycho for a club president. Most of it's courtesy CUZ of el presidente.

[adifferentbreed]

Oh. That sounds... not like torture at all.

[To be fair, she's been on both the giving and receiving ends of torture that would make Tarantino cover his eyes.]

If your president is such an asshole, why be in the club?

[gotlost]

Sister, you don't know half of it. That's the part that'd take all night. [He shrugs.] But I ain't complaining about anything that doesn't involve our president's shit.

[GRAND THEFT AUTO MISSIONS ARE PRETTY FUCKING NUTS THERE'S THAT ONE WHERE YOU JUMP FROM A PLANE TO ANOTHER PLANE TO BEAT UP SOME GUYS BEFORE THEY LAND johnny doesn't do that BUT THAT HAPPENED IN ONE GAME]

'Cause I don't leave the Lost hanging. Not their fault. Billy's the problem.

[adifferentbreed]

[GERRY COULD DO THAT WITH HER HANDS TIED BEHIND HER BACK but she can also teleport, so she's kind of a cheater.]

Like I said, not torture. But if he's that bad, then why don't you just kill him? You're number two, yeah? [She points at his jacket.] If you don't like how the show's being run, then run it.

[She shrugs. Because the politics behind motorcycle gangs can be simplified to that, right?]

[gotlost]

[WELL EXCUSE YOUR SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE ASSCHEEKS. Also to be completely honest the part where one of his best friends got actually tortured by the mafia counts. The rest of Johnny's experiences weren't torture, though. Just super shitty. "Torture" and "shitty" go hand-in-hand for him in his vocabulary. That and he's a big tough biker dude asking big and tough whoah watch out!!]

Hmm.

[It's just a grunt, but it's got something behind it. It's not like it's something he hasn't considered. But that's the part of the story that he wrestles with a little bit. He's got yet to hit the moment where his decision is absolutely concrete.]

[adifferentbreed]

[Pffft. Her best friend, her parents, her caregivers, BASICALLY ANYONE SHE HAS EVER REMOTELY LIKED has been turned against her, tortured, and/or killed. Some of them in front of her. So yeah, when she says torture, she means... torture.

But she's also a total asshole about it.]

Hm what? Is he bigger than you or something?

[gotlost]

[Yeah no that's legit torture, his is just shitty. He's had to deal with the deaths of several people he considered family, or at least used to. It was a lot of bullet-riddled bodies. A lot of them were by his own hands. And with that the ideals he held onto since he was younger died right with it. Most of it was thanks to the messy, bloody problems instigated by their president, a man Johnny used to friends with too. Half of this isn't until later, though.]

No. It's just complicated, man. With Billy, you don't do something like that without a lot of bodies getting involved. [Not that bodies that bother him. Johnny was a lot more level-headed than most of the Lost but he could still put a bullet in someone who deserved it. It's the fact that a lot of those bodies could be people he gave a shit about.] Like I said. Complicated. Long story short, I don't wanna get into the gory details on everything about my life, but whatever you wanna call my life... I ain't pussying out of whatever my mun's gonna throw at me.

[adifferentbreed]

[She could empathize with a lot of that, actually. She's never technically murdered her loved ones, but they died for her so the guilt's always going to crush down on her shoulders. There's also a third party to blame too. This fact heavily influences what she's about to say, although it's delivered carelessly.]

Sounds like bodies follow this guy around either way. You could be doing the world a favor.

You say that now. Wait until she's stuck you in a room with your worst nightmares. Or have you doing things you never thought you would. Or has you turned into an animal or a girl.

[gotlost]

Maybe, but the bodies of people I give a shit about is another thing.

Huh?

[adifferentbreed]

If he's a threat to them, then all the more reason to kill him off.

Yeah, that happens.

[gotlost]

That's why I said complicated, not impossible. [He's hesitant to overthrow Billy in the first place, though.]

... Uh-huh.

[adifferentbreed]

What's complicated? Kill him, then kill the bastards who try and off the people you give a shit about. It's the simplest answer there is.

[Yeah, Gerry's answer to most problems in life is "kill it."]

[gotlost]

Now you sound like Billy.

[Note: Billy is a fucking sadist when it comes to murder Johnny can barely talk.]

[adifferentbreed]

Sounds like at least he isn't a chickenshit.

[The whole "he who hunts monsters" thing is a big issue with her that she tends to miss on most days.]

[gotlost]

[On the plus side, Johnny isn't a good guy but compared to Billy he's an angel. Also, he huffs something of a laugh.]

No, that's our ass-kissing club secretary.

[At this point in his canon Johnny's still trying to reason with their president anyway. He doesn't seriously want to kill him yet, even if he thinks about it in the non-literal way sometimes.]

[adifferentbreed]

See, way too many politics with this club thing. You're better off flying solo, but I already know you won't listen because you're a prat.

[gotlost]

Why, thank you.

[He knows that was an insult but he actually has no idea what it means. Also obviously he is being sarcastic as shit.]