asdf;ljasdf;lkj because shenanigans ohgodwhatisthis

[noideawhatimdoing]

[ Scott looks terribly uncomfortable, looking over his shoulder and throwing angry and embarrassed looks at his mun. ]

Okay. Stop, just--

--it's not funny okay.

[ There's a slight whine in his voice before he pouts, flat out and utters a distressed-- ]

Why are there even TWO STILES. I mean. I don't know what I mean anymore.



My head hurts.

Comments

[causticly]

You think YOU'RE confused!? I'm the one with another me running around!

[benchwarming]

[ Here comes one of the Stiles, waving his arms. ]

Dude, dude, I am so sorry, just pretend I never said - that.

[benchwarming]

Face stealer.

[causticly]

Demon spawn.

[benchwarming]

Do you see any black eyes here? No, wait, let me get a flashlight you could be a skinwalker -

[noideawhatimdoing]

Oh... geez. Dude, which--

--which Stiles are you?

[ Poor potato. Werewolves and hunters, yes. But this??? ]

[noideawhatimdoing]

[ Okay that clears things up. ]

Dude. What the hell. Seriously??? Too much information.

[causticly]

[ Just stares because, what. What, are you kidding him? Seriously? ]

Dude, it's ME me. There's only one me. Don't listen to - to whatever that is.

[benchwarming]

It was the only way to prove it was me. Anything else one could reasonably assume, like - like a Sherlockian demon me.

[causticly]

Oh my god I am not a skinwalker. Those things don't even exist!

... they don't exist, right? Because that would kind of suck yet also might explain a few things about some people...

[benchwarming]

I don't know! I thought it was just werewolves, but now we're talking about demons and people that steal my face. Precautions need to be had. Where is the rock salt.

[causticly]

But I'm not a demon! Do I need to drink salty holy water or something, which I will but I will not like it because salt water is nasty, okay. It just is. I don't see how that would help anything.

And how do I know you're not a werewolf! You could be waiting for me to turn my back so you can TEAR MY FACE OFF!

lmao lmao lmao

[benchwarming]

You should drink salty holy water. Unless the salt invalidates the holy, for some reason, I should look into that -

What! I am not a werewolf, I will go get wolfsbane and rub it all over my body, like a - a wolfsbane rub down, and I would pass.

oh goooddddddddddd

[causticly]

I don't think it would, actually, it's still water regardless. Maybe I should just spray you with some BORAX.

Yeah, right, remember the last time we had anything to do with wolfsbane?

[noideawhatimdoing]

[ Aaaand this is Scott staring back. Because. Seriously. ]

Okay, fine--

if

if you're Stiles

[ He's squinting pretty hard trying to figure out if there's anything weird about this Stiles. Because. Reasons. Even if he looks exactly the way Stiles would look. ]

What happened on Halloween when we were ten?

[noideawhatimdoing]

How does that even prove anything? It's not like I knew you--

you...

[ Scott shakes his head like the confused puppy that he is. ]

Dude.

Girl's underwear?!??

[causticly]

Oh my god, seriously? Do you want me to recite our entire past? Okay, fine. Fine. When we were ten I made us dress up as Batman and Robin and I made you be Robin because I'm always Robin and then we went trick or treating and then we saw Lydia and I tried to get her attention but I tripped and fell and tore the tights I was wearing and started crying when she laughed at me. Then you got sick from all the candy you kept eating the whole night.

[ He is sooooooo totally not pleased with having retold that atrocious story he'd really like to forget. ]

scott why

[noideawhatimdoing]

[ Stiiiiiiiiill oddly skeptical. Because okay, maybe an evil twin sent to distract him would be prepared for Scott's queries on their past but Lydia has been Most Important Girl in Stiles' life.

So. Yes.

He leans in with narrowed eyes and murmurs. ]

Okay. So what was Lydia wearing...?

[benchwarming]

I didn't say to prove to you, dumbass -

[ But he feels kind of bad for shouting I WORE WOMEN'S UNDERWEAR when you were around, bestie. ]

It was laundry day! You know how girls have the granny panties they wear on laundry day, they were my granny panties.

Only they were purple and lacey.

[benchwarming]

Maybe we should make you drink bleach.

[ But that phrase makes him pause, then scrub his hands over his face. Okay, that was kind of telling. ]

How about I use the not hallucinating kind, maybe it won't absorb through my pores and do anything weird.

ffffffff

[causticly]

She was some sort of princess thing - I have no idea which one but she was really pretty and everything matched her ginger princess hair and she had this huge crown that seriously how did someone that little wear something like that? But it worked on her, you know? Well, she's Lydia so everything works on her.

[ He heaves a dramatic sigh. ]

Are you done now? I also know you howl monthly at the moon, if it helps.

[causticly]

Drinking bleach would kill anything and I'd like to keep living, thanks.

[ He eyes the other him warily. ]

What other kind? How do you know there's other kinds? Aside from the whole wolfsbane party thing.

[benchwarming]

I'm not sure I want you to, not that I hold any strange homicidal urges towards myself.

[ He eyes him warily in turn. ]

Uh, because there's a kind that kills Derek, and Scott didn't die when he drank the hallucinatory stuff? Also, did research, fuck yeah.

[causticly]

Well good, I don't either. I'm sure you're a good me.

[ Like that helps, even he knows that much. ]

You sound like you're telling the truth. Still don't trust you as far as I can throw you, which honestly isn't really all that far since I don't make it a habit of throwing people - Derek on the other hand.

[burninhale]

[ O hi Peter just dropped in here

to judge all of you

with this face.









All right, sufficient judgment has been passed, peace out. ]