(no subject)

[teen_human]

All I'm saying is if I have to be one of like a hundred of me why can't I be from some amazing alternate universe where I'm a total badass? I could be a hunter! I really cool hunter who turns on my hunting buddies when I see the light about not being a douche. Or I could be a vampire. I heard girls are into those. I could do that, you know. Secretly a hundred years old- wait no that's creepy, scratch that. Oh, or a ninja. That's an oldie but a goodie. Are aliens still a thing? Will they be a thing after that movie comes out? Though that's more like body snatcher demon possession when you get right down to it, not that I've read those or anything. Oh, wait, no, I call demigod. Yes.

The point is, I could be different. Something not normal Stiles, because there's something wrong when even being you becomes being one of a Greek chorus. Though I guess if we don't have to fight like Jet Li it probably doesn't really matter.

It'd still be cool.

Comments

whooooops

[boyisamonster]

Dude, you really don't want to be a vampire. Trust me.

[teen_human]

I dunno it might not be all bad - strength, speed, never needing to do your hair one way or another - except there's no real good answer to the 'how do you have sex' thing, and that's kind of important to me.

[boyisamonster]

The one question I never needed to hear... I don't know, you just end up looking pretty, well, dead. Smelling like it too, probably.

[Well, there's no "probably" about it for him, but shh.]

[teen_human]

Well sure if you're Count Orlok or more on the traditional bent but lately they're portrayed more as male underwear models who just happened to have been spending a lot of time in Norway during Artic Winter so they haven't gotten a lot of sun. I could do that.

[boyisamonster]

Trust me, they just look like that on film...if you can even see them on film. Whatever, anyway, it's gross in person. Like, really gross. If all girls looked like that...

Whatever, just trust me.

[teen_human]

Two words, my friend: Kate Beckinsale.

Though all the movies that have vampires and werewolves in them lately are doing that whole rivalry thing, and that'd be a little complicated. Bros before ... I can't think of a word for vampires that rhymes with hos.

[boyisamonster]

Yeah, but she's not... [Real.]

I've always just stuck with "bloodsucking fiend from beyond the grave" but that doesn't actually rhyme with much.

[teen_human]

Tom Cruise works too if you can get him before the crazy set in.

You need to work on your alliteration, good sir.

[boyisamonster]

They're more like Brad Pitt. Except worse. I don't know how you could get worse, but they do. It's like watching a Hallmark period drama of one of those boring classics they make you read, like...god, she's always talking about it, the one with the guy who's a total brooding dick and that chick that's all Maury Povich for him and swooning, and there might have been fainting couches?

Anyway, it doesn't really matter what you call them, it's not something you really want. It just kind of makes you a moody tool. With stupid hair.