hollyheights HOPEFULLY; canon is hare + guu

[guarder]

Hello, Miss Mun! It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance.

I understand you plan on sending me to a game. You have time to get used to my 'voice', so to speak, so please do not worry. There are more pressing matters to attend to, after all.

Have you read the rules? The FAQ? Do you know what their laws on gun control are? Is there gun control? Have you done your homework? Have you packed completely for your journey? Are you forgetting anything? Will you buckle your seatbelt? Please, buckle your seatbelt. You never know when you may need to engage in a highspeed getaway. Did you lock the car afterward? No, it doesn't matter to me if grand theft auto is a rare occurrence in your city. Did someone look at you the wrong way in the parking lot? Did someone look at you? Are they approaching you now? What do you mean, you're not 21? Please remember what we discussed, or I will be forced to take things into my own hands.

[...]

—Ah, you're right! That wouldn't work... But like I've said, it is best to be prepared!

Comments

[slushfund]

Gun control? It won't be too hard to get an authentic permit for these kinds of things.

[ There's an insidious cackle and the soft slap of a notebook closing. ]

Fucking mun says that where there's a will, there's a way... for once we agree, kekeke!

[guarder]

Do you think so? I heard I am to arrive without any means of protection whatsoever. Apparently this goes the same for all others.

I will dress exclusively in bulletproof vests for the occasion.

[slushfund]

Multiple vests, huh? I guess people in your line of work can afford to be fucking neurotic!

1/2

[guarder]

[ah





was he really so obvious...]

[guarder]

Please forgive me. It is either that or the alternative!

[slushfund]

Alternative huh.

[ Bubblegum pop. ]






A meat shield?

[guarder]

A meat shield with undesirable consequences, yes.

Though, if that is what it takes in the end...

i can't believe he guessed right wfienjkds

[slushfund]

VICTORY AT ALL COSTS, NO MATTER HOW HIGH THE STAKES. YA-HA~~~!!

adlkja 1/2

[guarder]

[dear god that was startling








good thing this is dear_mun. he will be much more vigilant elsewhere

CONSTANT. VIGILANCE.]

[guarder]

Ah.







Are you a terrorist?

[slushfund]

Hope you're not stupid enough to think a terrorist would actually fucking answer that truthfully.

[ If they were seated right now, his feet would be all up on the desk. ]

I'm just a quarterback.

[guarder]

[he did, actually. eye narrow...]

A likely story.

[slushfund]

You said it, fucking bowl cut! One of the best~

[guarder]

[bowl cut what!!!!!!!!! this guy is loud AND insulting]

Ch—! Unforgivable! If I weren't on a restraining order, you would have been taken care of by now!

[slushfund]

Kekekekekeke~~~!! Restraining order huh?

[guarder]

Yes. It is unofficial, of course, but seeing as she has full control...

I am beginning to see why there is a general resentment towards muns.

[slushfund]

[ Casually kicks shut the door to where Froot is tied up and gagged. ]

Speak for yourself! Fucking mun and I work toward a common goal!

[guarder]

Your behavior is appalling...

[slushfund]

You can and jerk around all day with your vests, but a strong offense is key to winning.

[guarder]

Ah, correct. If you can eliminate the adversary before they even have a chance to go on the offensive...!!

This is preferable, yes.

[slushfund]

That means we're on the same page... [ He seats himself, crossing his legs. ]

Lemme get you straight, bowl cut; you have no redeeming qualities at all, do ya?

Not even an ounce of fucking talent! I'm right, aren't I?

[guarder]

[!!] What an assumption...

I believe any 'talent' can be acquired with enough hard work.

[slushfund]

So you're willing to work your ass off even though it's definitely futile?

[guarder]

It's okay! I know that it is not!

[slushfund]

[ BEAMS A FOOTBALL AT HIM. ]