dear_mun | On the move

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On the move

Ok, fine. You waited until the move. Now that that's over, will you please either get to posting or shut York up? His constant muttering is actually starting to get annoying, dude. And I'm getting bored up in here.

So just... destress or whatever you call it. And then get back to us, alright?

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My, uh, "Mundane", is that right? Said something about you knowing another agent from the FBI.
Do you know what department he works with?

Well... yeah, kind of. His name is Francis York Morgan, but tells everybody to call him York for some reason.

What department? I dunno, just some FBI Special Agent. Never gave any specifics.

Oh, I only ask because I also happen to be a special agent. Nelson Tethers, Puzzle Research Division.
I thought he might be someone I know. But I don't think I'm familiar with anyone by the name of Francis Morgan, or York. He must be with one of the higher departments...

... Puzzle Research Division? I can't say I've ever heard of you within the FBI...

Yeah, that's... not the the first time I've heard that from one of the higher-ups. They tend to forget about us a lot. According to my director the President wasn't even aware of the West Wing's eraser shortage I was recently sent to handle.

Oh, you must be Mr. Morgan? Which division are you with, by the way?

Eraser shortage. [A wry chuckle.] That's certainly a new one.

[He nods, pulling out his FBI badge.] FBI Special Agent Francis York Morgan. Please, call me York. It's what everyone calls me. [Pockets the badge back into his coat.] As for division, I mainly work with Investigation and Homicide.

[A little nervously] Y-Yes, the factory that supplies the White House with all of it's erasers shut down. It was my first field assignment in years.

Um, nice to meet you, York! Wow, all the way up in Homicide Investigation? We don't even get invited to mixers with you guys...

Certainly a case worthy of a Special Agent, then.

Pleasure to meet you as well, Agent Tethers. [He nods... then turns around, putting his fingers to his temple and... talking to himself.] Zach... something tells me that this guy might be a fake. I mean seriously, Puzzle Research Division?

[Nelson picks up on York's mumbling, but couldn't exactly hear what he said]

Um, I'm sorry, what was that? I didn't quite catch that.

Hm? Oh, nothing. Don't worry about it. [And... lights up a cigarette. I'm so sorry, Nelson.]

So... Puzzle Research, you say? What exactly is it you do there?

Oh, well we mostly solve crimes, issues, and problems relating to puzzles... or anything that could be considered one. That's why I was sent to Scoggins to investigate the Eraser Factory. Whenever the Bureau made an inquiry into the situation, that's all we ever got back; bizarre puzzles.

[Takes a drag, blows smoke out.] Huh. Figured it'd only be a matter of time before the higher-ups decide to make just any old department.

Maybe they could use a Vegetable Crimes unit if Attack of the Killer Tomatoes ever happens... [Big-ass grin at that.]

[Nelson coughs and backs away slightly from the smoke, fanning it away]

We, uh, do have a Vegetable Crimes unit. I've got a friend there. [Well, more like an acquaintance. But they both like puzzles!] He says being with Roots and Tubers is pretty boring, but the guys in Leafy Greens are always busy.

[Aaaand flatfaces.] You're kidding. I was kidding.

... you're serious, aren't you? May I, uh... see your badge, if you don't mind?

Well, they haven't had a real case since the Taro Murders back in '76.

Um, sure? Hold on...

[He gets out his badge from the inside of his suit pocket, under his coat, and hands it to York. Sure enough, it says "FBI Special Agent Nelson Tethers: Department of Puzzle Research", and has a jigsaw motif]

Have you ever shown them Attack of the Killer Tomatoes? I'm sure they'd love it there.

[Inspecting, inspecting... turning it around to look at watermarks, squinting a bit...] Wow. This is legitimate. I'm honestly surprised. Um... sorry for doubting you, then, Agent Tethers. [He hands it back.]

I'll... have to ask Jim Ingraham next time I see him.

[He takes it back]
You didn't think I was a real agent?
[Siiiigh. He can't say he's too surprised though]

Mm. It's very.... well, almost the epitome of a bad B-grade horror film. Premiered in 1978, stared a cast of unknowns, and enjoys a certain cult status right now.

... I'm sorry, Nelson, but your claim was a bit dubious.

Yeah, I really don't get out to the movies much. Though the Puzzle Division's secretary did recently send me this animated film from Japan she thought I'd enjoy. I actually forget the title... something about a Professor and a Diva? I sadly haven't gotten around to watching it yet.

It's... okay, I understand. Considering the assignments we get, it's no wonder you'd never heard of us.

Sounds... interesting, though I can't say I've heard of anything along those lines. I'll have to look it up.

What kind of assignments do you normally get, besides the eraser shortage?

I'll let you know if it's any good when I get to see it.

Well, crosswords are pretty common, and I've gone through I don't know how many issues of Puzzle Sensei magazine. Got a whole box full of them.
But I'd say I like Rubix Cubes the most.

Maybe I'll give it a look... though animation isn't really my thing. Especially not recent animation.

... You get assigned crosswords and puzzle magazines? Are you sure somebody higher up isn't just pulling your leg? [Hey, it's plausible.]

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

On the move

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Welp, now he's awake.

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I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE

:D

oh you