Director Nick Fury is the best goddamn motivater.

[nostupidassdecision]

We don't have time for this. All you're doing is sitting on your ass, eating crackers, and watching television. Shitty television. You need to get your ass in gear and get back to work. I could give you the right push, but you don't deserve it.

...

Are you still here? Go. Back. To. Work.

Comments

[highflyingbirdofprey]

Hey, don't worry 'bout it too much. I'm pretty sure you're gonna find a way to motivate him, mister...?

[Yeah, Falcon has no damn clue who this Sam Jackson looking guy is.]

[headbitchincharge]

Glad to hear you're back to your old self, sir. ( aka pg-13 doesn't suit you, director. )

[staysangry]

You do a good pep talk, Director.

[nostupidassdecision]

Fury. Director Fury. And I'd motivate him more if he wasn't such a goddamn lazy-assed kid. Fooling around with me is not what needs to be happening right now.

[nostupidassdecision]

[PG-13 doesn't suit anyone. Fuck that shit. In other words, glad to see you.]

Agent Hill. People have more things to worry about then some language problems. In the words of the French, fuck that shit.

[nostupidassdecision]

Whatever gets the job done. I've never been the kind of guy who'll tiptoe around what needs to be said.

[staysangry]

I imagine that's served you well in the past.

[highflyingbirdofprey]

Huh. Last time I talked to a guy named Director Fury he was older and much whiter than you. I'm guessin' you're from another universe than me.

And in case you don't know me, I am Falcon And the bird-

[He points up, and perched nearby is a good sized red falcon]

-is Redwing.

And the muns aren't so bad, so long as they don't do anythin' stupid.

[imfollowinghim]

How's that working out for you?

[hotredhero]

Still giving those great motivational speeches?

[nostupidassdecision]

Not bad. Get's them scared enough to wet themselves, but we have to start somewhere.

[nostupidassdecision]

Worked well the first time.

[imfollowinghim]

I guess that's one way not to take any crap from your mun.

[hotredhero]

Not everyone responds to the whole hard knocks speech, you know.

[nostupidassdecision]

Most of the time. The armed forces don't give a rat's ass if you can purple prose at them.

[nobodysbishie]

...Would it make a difference if it was good TV?

[So much poker-face.]

[nostupidassdecision]

What's your definition of good TV?

[nostupidassdecision]

Not everyone responds to sarcastic remarks.

[nostupidassdecision]

We have a big difference of opinion. The mun thinks we should have fun. I said that some people need to shut up and get back to work.

[hotredhero]

Fine.

You could ask nicely.

[nobodysbishie]

Prob'ly not the same definition as yours. [Hint, hint... though muns tend to have crappy taste anyway.]

Always make sure an' watch Demolition Man if it's on, though. [Because to a time-traveling mutant cop from the future, it's always interesting what people imagine would coming up ahead. Plus, Wesley Snipes put on one hell of a performance.]

[nostupidassdecision]

Do I look old to you? Yes or no question, Falcon and Big Bird. Answer carefully.

[highflyingbirdofprey]

[Here, have a smile. He certainly sounds like the Fury he knows.]

Didn't say you looked older, I was sayin' he looked older than you. And careful what you call Redwing. He's kinda ornery.

[nostupidassdecision]

[Watching rerun episodes of "Don't Be Tardy For The Wedding" is really getting to him.]

Demolition Man. Plenty of stuff blowing up, I take it? Big guns blazing?

[nobodysbishie]

[...Yeah, there is NO excuse for that. At least get some Alton Brown or SOMEthing!]

That would be a pretty fun show, wouldn't it? Wreckin' balls, controlled implosions, almost like a documentary on controlled deconstruction; somebody oughta pitch that.

Made a pretty good 90's action movie too, which is what I was talkin' about.

[imfollowinghim]

You're allowed to take a break every once and a while, Director.

[latrodectism]

Eloquent as always, Sir. [She's always admired that. No really.]

[persuadeyou]

Inspirational.

[nostupidassdecision]

The bird is ornery. Right. I'll keep it in mind. Guess he's not much of a "Polly wants a cracker" kind of bird?

[nostupidassdecision]

You've seen the kind of things we're up against, right? A break just isn't in the scheduling.

[nostupidassdecision]

You're right. I could.

[nostupidassdecision]

I must have missed that one. I'll put it on my Netflix. I'm more of a romantic-comedy kind of guy.

[That is a completely straight face.]

[imfollowinghim]

Hate to be the one breaking this to you, but the decision's kind of out of your hands around here.

[nostupidassdecision]

Some people just don't deserve a big motivational speech. And I've never been invited to Harvard to give the graduation speech, so they're not getting one, now.

[nostupidassdecision]

They should invite me to give Princeton's graduation speech. I'd show those graduates a thing or two.

[persuadeyou]

Why stop there? You should do a college tour.

[highflyingbirdofprey]

Yeah, Redwing is less a "cracker" bird and more a "bad guys asschecks" bird. Plus I do have a handy ability to speak to birds telepathically.

I am having entirely too much fun with this conversation. :3

[nobodysbishie]

Go for the escapism, huh? I can see it.

[On his side, Bishop's mouth nearly twitched. Nearly.]

'S worth taking a look at, in between Meg Ryan flicks somewhere. No need to fiddle with your queue too much, right?

[nostupidassdecision]

Is that something that was handed down, or did you get bit by a bird when you were a kid?

[nostupidassdecision]

What about one of those game things everyone is talking about? I get to make the decision of where I go.

[imfollowinghim]

Then I guess you're luckier than most of us.

Me too! :3

[nostupidassdecision]

I've always been a sucker for a good Meg Ryan flick. I could take some time to watch something else. Expand my horizons. I'm getting too old for this shit.

[nostupidassdecision]

Yale is a bunch of yuppies hoping they can all be big time reporters. I'm not too fond of the press.

[persuadeyou]

And you don't think speaking to them would cut out an entire class ful of Yale reporters?

[highflyingbirdofprey]

None of the above, Fury Two-point-Oh. I was blasted by the Red Skull years ago with the cosmic cube, and it caught Redwing, too. First it was just me and Redwing, but eventually was all birds.

St...I mean, Cap was a huge, help, too. First guy I met of the costumed set and really talked me into being a hero myself

Hah! You just HAD to say it because I wasn't going to

[nobodysbishie]

Can't say I've been a fan. But since I have an expert to ask, what makes for a good Meg Ryan flick? A man ain't never too old to learn something new.