actualcannibal: (Killing for sport.)
Superstar Cannibal SHIA LABEOUF ([personal profile] actualcannibal) wrote in [community profile] dear_mun2012-04-29 05:47 pm
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dw psls yo

Did you really think that stabbing my kidney would kill me?

I'm Hollywood Superstar Shia Labeouf. I've been with Optimus Prime and played Indiana Jones' kid.

You are never going to kill Hollywood Superstar Shia Labeouf.
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spicysoursweet: (Default)

[personal profile] spicysoursweet 2012-04-30 08:12 pm (UTC)(link)
Heh...how weird. We were JUST listening to that song yesterday.
actualcannibal: (LURKING)

[personal profile] actualcannibal 2012-04-30 08:14 pm (UTC)(link)
It's cute that you think it's just a song. Just as I planned it.
spicysoursweet: (He's alright.)

[personal profile] spicysoursweet 2012-04-30 08:15 pm (UTC)(link)
How's that comicbook of yours doing?
actualcannibal: (And your phone is dead.)

[personal profile] actualcannibal 2012-04-30 08:16 pm (UTC)(link)
...ugh. Were you talking to that Sam Witwicky running around?

I'll have everyone know it's bad on purpose; it's meant to get a point across.
spicysoursweet: (Psyco vespa girl grin.)

[personal profile] spicysoursweet 2012-04-30 08:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Actually Sam and I had a thing going in my game before he died.

And by thing I mean sex. I rocked his world.

Anyway I don't think everyone knows that superstar~
actualcannibal: (GNAWING OFF YOUR LEG!)

[personal profile] actualcannibal 2012-04-30 08:55 pm (UTC)(link)
[..ew. Blech blugh gross.]

I'm sure you did. He's kind of a virginal asshole. You should have killed him after, that's how big a douchebag he is.

So? Do I give a fuck? It made money and the next series will totally get my postmodernism minimalistic views across.
spicysoursweet: (Default)

[personal profile] spicysoursweet 2012-04-30 09:17 pm (UTC)(link)
Sounds like somebody didn't get hugged enough as a child~

Or maybe he just got everything he wanted too easily.
actualcannibal: (Out of the corner of your eye.)

[personal profile] actualcannibal 2012-04-30 09:24 pm (UTC)(link)
Bullshit. It took me over a month to Megan's pants, and then what? She goes off and marries some dude and like, that is that? It's just..whatever it is, man, I don't know. We had some real chemistry, but, oh no. You go off to play Indiana Jones' kid with Cate Blanchett and you come back and she's all crying and shit and got ten thousand more tattoos, talking about how some asshole called her the next Angelina Jolie and when was she going to have some incest shit going on?

Easy? Fuck that. I was on Holes with Sigourney Weaver and she's all, "when I played Ripley a blah blah bloo let me talk about the GOLDEN AGE of Hollywood" as I'm over there waiting for the camera to fixed in just my underwear, freezing my nutsack off. Yeah, that is so easy.
spicysoursweet: (Money mouth batter girl)

[personal profile] spicysoursweet 2012-04-30 09:28 pm (UTC)(link)
So much anger.

[Has pulled a psychiatrist desk from out of nowhere]

Now tell me about your mother.
actualcannibal: (EATING ALL THE BODIES)

[personal profile] actualcannibal 2012-04-30 09:30 pm (UTC)(link)
[SHARPENING HIS AX]
checkoutthesedecks: (Fuuuck what is this talking horse shit)

[personal profile] checkoutthesedecks 2012-04-30 10:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Fuck dude, why aren't you on Even Stevens anymore?

That shit was legit.
actualcannibal: (And your phone is dead.)

[personal profile] actualcannibal 2012-04-30 10:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Two words, Spryo the Dragon, and one huge heap of shit: Kim Possible.
checkoutthesedecks: (I'm a loveable scamp!)

[personal profile] checkoutthesedecks 2012-04-30 10:30 pm (UTC)(link)
I didn't know you were on there. Were you Ron Weasel?

Remember the one with the nachos and the thing?

Shit.

I could go for some nachos.

You got nachos?
actualcannibal: (EATING ALL THE BODIES)

[personal profile] actualcannibal 2012-04-30 10:33 pm (UTC)(link)
No, but that bitch who played my sister in Even Stevens was the voice of Kim. Then she started singing and failed spectacularly and I got a movie career and she just...probably doing coke now, fuck if we talk anymore.

No, and if I did, I wouldn't share. Why don't you go headbutt a sheep and make it turn into a butterfly, little guy?
checkoutthesedecks: (Smooth move)

[personal profile] checkoutthesedecks 2012-04-30 11:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Pfffthahahahaha.

Butterflies don't have sheepbutts. Man, you are one funny fucking...not horse thing.
actualcannibal: (You can see there's blood on his face.)

http://nicochu.tumblr.com/post/22150915062 there is a remix omg i have to share

[personal profile] actualcannibal 2012-04-30 11:05 pm (UTC)(link)
Are you totally unaware that you look like a video game character?

How high are you right now, on a scale of one to acid.
checkoutthesedecks: (Bad vibes dude)

aww yeah this shit's my jam.

[personal profile] checkoutthesedecks 2012-04-30 11:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Bob Marley.
actualcannibal: (My dogs gnaw on human feet.)

i bet michael bay did the remix with the transformer additions.

[personal profile] actualcannibal 2012-04-30 11:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Jesus.

...we need to get you to a hospital, man, you are going to die.
checkoutthesedecks: (Yeah call me when you stop the bronytalk)

needs moar explosions

[personal profile] checkoutthesedecks 2012-05-01 01:24 am (UTC)(link)
I think I'm pretty fine dude.

Check out these fucking motor skills.

[Falls over face-first.]
actualcannibal: (Out of the corner of your eye.)

he could only get 27mil on such short notice. sigh.

[personal profile] actualcannibal 2012-05-01 01:33 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, okay, come on, little guy...let's get you up...

[hollywood superstar shia labeouf
he's coming
he's got his hands under your belly
feeling your tummy rumble
shia labeouf

he's never had dragon meat before
but now he feels a new power
of taking the life of a mythological fucked up dragon
huh huh]

Come on, I have a cabin not far from here. You can crash there.

[and die there
at shia labeouf's]
checkoutthesedecks: (Fuuuck what is this talking horse shit)

[personal profile] checkoutthesedecks 2012-05-01 01:40 am (UTC)(link)
[That's some sweet beats, brackets. You're totally cool enough to follow blindly.]

Does the cabin have weed?
actualcannibal: (Out of the corner of your eye.)

[personal profile] actualcannibal 2012-05-01 01:44 am (UTC)(link)
It's...it's stocked well enough. Vacationing in the woods, trying to write my first screenplay. Wanna do that Ben Affleck slash Matt Damon thing, make it a big one. Just without the burning out with shitty movies thing.

[he doesn't walk silently to his own cabin
he knows what awaits there
inside there are bear traps hanging from the wall
the lampshades all seem to have been stitched together out of something leathery
there is a fire in the small place for fires (fireplace)
next to it is a sharpened ax
there is a low cot with a bear skin for a blanket]

Go on, man, I'll see what I have.

[fetching you your last meal
hollywood superstar shia labeouf]
checkoutthesedecks: (Ba ba ba ba ba)

[personal profile] checkoutthesedecks 2012-05-01 02:11 am (UTC)(link)
You write slash fic? Weird, dude.

...awww shit. This place is...awesome. Yeah, I'm totally gonna crash here.
actualcannibal: (GNAWING OFF YOUR LEG!)

[personal profile] actualcannibal 2012-05-01 02:14 am (UTC)(link)
[He turns, shuffling about the kitchen as though he's getting something ready
a drink, perhaps

but he's not
and deep down, he really craves dragon meat

something is coming
AHH THROUGH THE AIR!!!
a set of kitchen knives

headed right at spyro]
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