dear_mun | Voice Test

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("Your point about Wizard dominance being FOR THE MUGGLES' OWN GOOD - this, I think, is the crucial point. Yes, we have been given power and yes, that power gives us the right to rule, but it also gives us responsibilities over the ruled. We must stress this point, it will be the foundation stone upon which we build. Where we are opposed, as we surely will be, this must be the basis of all our counterarguments. We seize control FOR THE GREATER GOOD. And from this it follows that where we meet resistance, we must use only the force that is necessary and no more. (This was your mistake at Durmstrang! But I do not complain, because if you had not been expelled, we would never have met.)"

Certain words will always come back to haunt and Albus stares at those he had written not so long ago, his lips curled into a grimace.)

I would set that in the fire if I thought it would do any good. (All he can do is...bury it somewhere. Somehow. And, always, always keep it fresh in his mind so he does not make that mistake again.)

I am not fleeing from it; I accept it, though it brings me no joy.

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You say that like I bought you no joy.

[ A point he'd be happy to argue long into the night, he's half tempted to lean in and give his old lover a kiss on the cheek, though, if the others reaction to that old letter was anything to go by, perhaps it was'nt the best idea.]

Oh you brought me plenty. Too much, I would say, and it blinded me. (His voice cracks and his eyes seem suspiciously bright.) I considered having myself imprisoned for a time.

You could have just stayed the path, you know. [ Don't mind him just reaching out to link his fingers with Albus with a little tilt of his head.] And it would have been a shame to lock up such a brilliant mind like yours.

How could I with what happened - ? (He cannot resist the touch; Gellert knows his weakness and his hand holds those fingers warm and fast.) I used to think the same of you.

Your sister was...unfortunate. But we still had plans. You and me. [ He can't deny that. Even if that had been a trigger for a whole different sort of understanding of power. There's a little smile as his fingers link with the others. It's that same sort of feeling when they'd been together before, even if there was distance this time round.]

I'm not locked up. Not yet.

More than unfortunate. Far more. She depended on me! She had no one else. (But this is indeed a complex situation. Albus cannot simply forget his love; Gellert is his first! His only. Losing him is a different sort of hurt that he fears will never heal.)

You will be...unless you intend to linger here? (He turns against his better judgement, pulling him closer.)

Edited 2016-12-16 07:45 (UTC)

You can't blame yourself for that. Her own magic-... [ But really, what was the point in rehashing such a old fight. There's a soft sigh when the other pulls him closer. A hand reaching out to touch his old lovers hip.]

And you'll be an old man who never gives up his fight. Our future is always there. Does mean we have to accept it. I could linger here. Been a while since you've been so...affectionate. It's tempting.

I know. (He breathes out the word, hissing faintly. Ariana had been a very special and sad case of wild Magic. No one could have taught her to control it in her state and oh how he had thought of her as a burden more than once. Albus feels guilty for potentially killing her and for thinking so poorly of her - as if she could have helped being so broken.)

It could have been my spell that killed her. (Frankly, he assumes it was his spell. Even if the truth is different, does that really matter? The outcome is the same. He is the oldest sibling and she was his responsibility.)

If I am given such a gift as time, I shall not waste it. (His cheeks flush and he looks down and away.) You know how I feel. The years haven't dampened that.

Or is it that much worse a thought that it was mine that killed her? [ Either way the end result was the same thing. Albus wanted or had wanted nothing to do with her the moment she died. The idea of that wild magic had caught Gellert just as much as the need for the elder wand.]

And that means what, exactly? [ Don't mind his head leaning into press a kiss to the others cheek.] That feeling has always been mutual.

(A breath catches, tight and painful, somewhere under his ribs.) We were wrong. I was arrogant and stupid. I mustn't let her fate befall any other child.

(So that sets his sights on Hogwarts; a place where he can do good and reach out to children who need it dearly.)

Gellert... (It's a warning - albeit a soft one; almost pleading. A tear slips down his cheek.) I do not blame you for your nature. I admire it. You are so brilliant.

(Albus places a hand on Gellert's cheek and gives him a gentle kiss on the lips.)

But you...and I...together... We are dangerous. You know I cannot allow you to move forward.

We were right, we had too many nights up talking for us to be wrong about this. Her death was...it happened. But I refuse to stand here and say we were on the wrong path.

[ screw Hogwarts. He'd left Dumstrung for a certain reason, Hogwarts was the same. Don't mind a thumb wiping away that tear on the others face. ] And we're infinitely better together. We always have been. You see things I don't in places I'd never look.

[ He's just going to lean into that kiss lightly before he frowns a little.]

And you know I cannot allow you to stop me. I take it a warm body next to you in bed won't change your mind on this?

Edited 2016-12-16 08:35 (UTC)

We were young. We thought of the world in selfish terms; we forgot that people should always have a choice. The fate of dictators - for that was what we would be - is grim and they do far more harm than good.

(His gaze hardens and he does his absolute best not to react to the gesture.)

In all the places we looked...in all the topics we scoured and contemplated, we forgot empathy. We forgot that we are no better than Muggles. Having a gift doesn't give you or me the right to decide the fate of those who lack it.

(The frown tugs at his heart and his smile is sad.)

Even now you are scheming. (With a sigh, he draws the other Wizard into a tight embrace.) I wish to be quiet with you.

Look at the world and tell me that you really think that is right? Look at America? The punish themselves with insane, inane laws and you think we should let them choose? People need to be nudged in the right direction.

[But he knows it's a heated conversation and he sucked on the inside of his cheek.]

And what about the greater good? We do what we need to because people don't see it as clearly as we do. As you and I do.

[ He's just signing as the other pulls him into that embrace.] I always preferred you loud and moaning in my ear. [ It was a teasing comment but at least it was honest and better than any more...real talk about the two of them.]

Edited 2016-12-16 08:52 (UTC)

I did not say I would sit idle and do nothing. (As if he could ever lead a boring, mundane sort of life.) The trick lies in raising the next generation to be better than the last. That is why I wish to become a Professor at Hogwarts. Perhaps one day I could be the Headmaster too.

From that vantage point, I can influence the Ministry of Magic as well as the children and their parents. I shall never stop building the sort of world I know you - we - imagined. I just must go about it...with a gentle touch.

(He smiles a little more at the passion in Gellert's voice and the tease.) I am surprised the entirety of Godric's Hollow didn't hear us.

(Though he is certain Aberforth did.) You must know... I do not hate you.

Edited 2016-12-16 09:01 (UTC)

Then you become a spoke in the machine of the current system, I'm not saying you wouldn't be a fantastic professor. You'd be stunning. Merlin himself would think you're a great teacher with the way your mind works but I'm talking about utterly changing that system and you know that.

I fear that it requires more than gentle touch or a deft hand on this Albus.

[ Well, at least it has all the trappings of those old talks late at night the two of them had. Gellert's smile was just going to match the others at those next words.] You do have quite the set of lungs on you.

[ Aberforth certainly did. Gellert use to give him...certain looks to make sure he knew what was happening in those next room.]

I don't hate you either. I could never but you're...on the other side of this and...I won't stray.

A noisy spoke; a spoke with much experience and time dedicated to many causes. I will not rest at Hogwarts either. As I said, I will not rest with the time I am given. I will not waste what should have been Ariana's life.

(Does he wish he had perished in that duel? The short answer: yes. But he knows that is selfish too. The dead have no reason to worry over the living unless they choose to do so.)

You would go down in a blaze of glory. I thought once that if such an end was our fate, it would not be so bad.

(But he is trying to mature; trying to become a man who can shoulder the losses, the pain and bring something good into the world. He tilts his head and memorizes that smile - so bright and fierce.)

And you always had a...deft touch. (He nods and gives Gellert a shyer smile.) I understand you...more than I understand myself.

And yet causes, as noble as they are, work against our plans. Against me. I know you loved your sister, truly. I do and you might go on to do a many great things at that school. I loathed my experience at mine because we were apart but you being headmaster? But...is that really the path you've set yourself on?

[ While Gellert never wished to die in that duel and any guilt about what happened-..well, only came from losing Albus. Not about the fact he might have killed his sister. ]

Not bad at all. It's a pity you won't be there holding my hand while we do it together.

[ There's a cheeky chuckle at those dirty memories, his eyes dancing into the others making it clear just what he was recalling.] Those sounds you made are among my greatest accomplishments. [ A hand moves to cup the other's neck lightly, a hand running along his jawline.] You're really never coming to join me. Are you?

In the United Kingdom... (His throat is too dry and he knows, no matter how charming Gellert can be, he must be firm about this.) Should you set your sights elsewhere, our paths would not cross for some time.

(Which is delaying the inevitable. No one can stand a chance against Grindelwald. Except for him.)

I have made my decision. (He meets Gellert's gaze as he says that, using all of his Gryffindor courage to do so.) We will...stand against each other...

We may fight. (Again. Even so, the color on his face rises and he closes his eyes, holding onto those secretive, wonderful memories.) I seem to recall coaxing some sounds from you too.

Yet I was often too loud to hear much, I admit. (He tries to chuckle, but the sound is grating to his ears and quickly silenced.) No. I love you and I must do this.

You want me to go to America? [ He's not dumb enough to not get what he other was saying. He could alway terrorize another part of the world for a bit.] But they will cross again.

[ Even Gellert knows Albus is the only one who could ever get close enough to actually take him out. Not that he thought the other would.]

You choose the path that hurts us both. You know that. [ There's a little-annoyed tone at that. Why couldn't the other just see what he was trying to do?]

You may win a bet on a quidditch match. We will fight. There's no if here. [ Gellert just gives another sigh of frustration at the others words before he meets his eyes.] We could...

[ But he just looks away, he wasn't about to change the others mind on that.] Well you have that talented little secret thing where you roll your tongue-...

Loud enough to make your brother wonder if I was hurting you instead of fucking. [ His hand drops away with a little press of his lips.] I love you too but I understand.

You wish to see changes there, do you not? (He hates himself for sending such a storm to America, but maybe...maybe...Gellert can do some good? Albus might be kidding himself. Grief and love are good at blinding.) Yes.

(Swallowing, he steels himself.) I can say I never intended to hurt you; I could give you many a sad word of farewell, but we both know those words would ring hollow. You have known your mind since you could walk, I imagine, and I do not wholly regret knowing you. I do not regret loving you.

(But this is how it must be.) I must prepare myself to be worth your effort. (Yet he will never cast a Killing Curse at anyone again.) I think we shall give the Wizarding world a sight to behold on that day.

(His eyebrows rise and he smirks.) You did seem to like that. (The mischief softens into genuine love - something Gellert will always have from him.)

I have hope for you. I truly keep very little for myself. Enough to live, yes; enough to do some good in righting what our society has gotten so wrong. I would support you if you achieved success - true success - but I worry...

I do not think it is possible with your methods.

That's rather not the point. [ Because you're sending him away to do god knows what. But the little drop of his eyes easily betrays the fact he'll go.] American Witches do have a lot to learn.

[ Who knows? He might drag a few into his cause over there. ]

You do not regret loving me but you'll easily push that aside for your perceived...better way. [ He's only a little bitter about it.] You're always be worth my effort Albus, though at least it'll still be a meeting of equals. [ He doesn't share that reluctance to use that same spell.] Far be it for us to let anyone down.

[ It's hard, even now, not to enjoy that smirk on the others face.] I did. Rather...hard not too.

And I don't think it's all that possible with yours. It would have been done already, if it was.

You could teach them much. (Part of him wishes he was going too. Said longing is not absent from his voice.) We discussed them at length once we saw to the issues in the United Kingdom and Bulgaria.

(Their homes respectively.)

I cannot be selfish; not for you. Not for anyone. (He hesitates and reaches for Gellert's hands, bending to kiss his palms.) I would give you no less.

(Albus is aware that in duels, Gellert is absolutely ruthless. He must seek to incapacitate him, which will be no small feat!)

Ah but no one has ever really known me. Not as you do. (His eyes flash and he lifts his chin.) There have been great Professors, great Headmasters and beloved Ministry employees, but there has never been one who has tied both spheres together as I intend to.

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